Pregnancy After Loss (November)

[carlycurry]

Deanna, do you own a doppler? In the next couple of weeks you should be able to hear the heartbeat at home with a doppler... maybe if you got one it would ease your mind. I know it's helping me feel a LOT better now that I can find it at home with a little patience and trying... (bean still is hard to find and moves away, lol)

[leviandgarettsmom]

Originally Posted by carlycurry Deanna, do you own a doppler? In the next couple of weeks you should be able to hear the heartbeat at home with a doppler... maybe if you got one it would ease your mind. I know it's helping me feel a LOT better now that I can find it at home with a little patience and trying... (bean still is hard to find and moves away, lol)

I got one just like your's. it should be here any day now.

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[canadianbakers]

Originally Posted by leviandgarettsmom And that is exactly where I am now...which is such a let down after my high of actually seeing a good heartbeat. Now I try to distract myself from dwelling on whether or not it will still be there when I go back next time. It is such a vicious cycle!

All you can do is tell yourself that you have right now, you have today, with this bean. Enjoy it, try to put the worry aside, and deal with tomorrow when it comes.
That is much easier said than done, I know, but sometimes it's all you can do. One step in front of the other.

I bet having the doppler will help you. it arrives quickly and you have early luck with it!

This is a lot of why I didn't bother going to the Dr earlier on - if I really, truly felt something was wrong and dangerous to me, I would have gone, but just for normal check ups or whatnot, no thanks. Hearing Hiccup's hb wouldn't have brought me any comfort. I needed to have the u/s and see a moving baby measuring correctly - and I needed to wait it out until the right time for it.

[3 ladybugs]

Thank you for the warm welcome!

Originally Posted by canadianbakers Jennifer - Congrats on your new bean! for many months to come and a healthy sticky bean in there! I can't imagine going through an ordeal like you have had I hope that things carry on normally for the next little bit and then you can relax somewhat and have a more "normal" pregnancy.

We all go through things. My things are just easier to see then others. One thing I know for certain, is this pregnancy will be a lot of things, but "normal" it will not be. I just hope I don't accidentally double book a doctor somewhere along the way.

Originally Posted by carlycurry Welcome, Jennifer!! I hope and pray you have a wonderful 9 months ahead of you! I, too, am a Lymphoma survivor. I'll be 4 years in remission in February.

Did you have H or NH? I was both but got treated with R-CHOP so it was NH treatment. I see more people that are younger have H and are able to keep some of their fertility. I go to the Lymphoma board from time to time. Good luck to you!

Originally Posted by leviandgarettsmom And that is exactly where I am now...which is such a let down after my high of actually seeing a good heartbeat. Now I try to distract myself from dwelling on whether or not it will still be there when I go back next time. It is such a vicious cycle! Welcome Jennifer! for all you have been through mama, but soooo happy you are here with us now. Sent from my iPad using DS Forum

If it makes you feel any better I am in the same boat. I didn't get a doppler with my son, but my OB (after I got released at 12 weeks) said I could come in every other week for doppler checks till I felt kicks. With DS I felt kicks shortly after 16 weeks and I had a ultrasound at 16 weeks. So I only went in once for the doppler check (14 weeks).

I am trying to relax with this pregnancy like I said, but it seems that everything is putting me on edge. Is this really morning sickness? Is it worse then yesterday? Do by boobs feel tender still? Are they bigger? Do I feel stretching in my uterus? or is that just my scar tissue on my bladder from the radiation? Sometimes I just wish that I could be hit over the head with a baseball bat till DH's birthday! (February 25)

Then since I am sure you can all understand this. I was in church this morning and it is the start of Advent. Well I opened the hymnal and just started crying! I felt like my DD JUST died and I remember when I brought a hymnal into her bedside and sang all the christmas songs I knew to her from it. She died on January 5, 2007. All these songs just reminded me of how I was determined to giver her the best life I could even if she couldn't come home.

[Harmony96]

Originally Posted by 3 ladybugs Then since I am sure you can all understand this. I was in church this morning and it is the start of Advent. Well I opened the hymnal and just started crying! I felt like my DD JUST died and I remember when I brought a hymnal into her bedside and sang all the christmas songs I knew to her from it. She died on January 5, 2007. All these songs just reminded me of how I was determined to giver her the best life I could even if she couldn't come home.

I remember at church during one of the first services after Jonathan died, the song leader came up to me afterwards and said that when he was picking out which hymns to lead, he was trying to choose between one of two songs (and he also told me what song he did not lead), and thought that the one he chose wouldn't be as hard on me. I told him that either one of them would have been equally hard, b/c they were both the ones that I sang to Jonathan while he was in the NICU.

[leviandgarettsmom]

For the past 5-6 days I've had nausea most of the day. Not exactly a great feeling, but soooo reassuring. Today...NOTHING! Not one single wave of nauseousness. I should be thankful for good-feeling days like today, but I'm not. I hate them. They are terrifying & make me crazy. I just want to fast-forward through the next few weeks & get past all these days that make it difficult to just enjoy being pregnant. I know I could choose to not let these things bother me, but right now I'm just not strong enough to do that.

[newcdmommy29]

Originally Posted by leviandgarettsmom For the past 5-6 days I've had nausea most of the day. Not exactly a great feeling, but soooo reassuring. Today...NOTHING! Not one single wave of nauseousness. I should be thankful for good-feeling days like today, but I'm not. I hate them. They are terrifying & make me crazy. I just want to fast-forward through the next few weeks & get past all these days that make it difficult to just enjoy being pregnant. I know I could choose to not let these things bother me, but right now I'm just not strong enough to do that.

"easy days" are so tough after a loss. I'm sorry you are feeling so good and pray for a wave a nausea very soon to ease your mind. (even though that sounds horrible) praying for you!!

[TS8213]

Reading along and thinking of you all. I'll get a new thread up as soon as I get on a real computer. The DS app keeps crashing every time I try and log on.

Welcome to the newcomers!

Yay for HBs and good appts!

AFM: Haven't been feeling the greatest physically for the last week or so. My pelvis, hips and lower back are barely making it through the day. Little miss is so low that I'm sure that's not helping matters any. I've been getting down on all 4s at night to try and stretch out the muscles but it only helps for a little while. I'm not feeling like I'll make it to March at this rate. Heck, 38w (when I delivered my other 2), is looking slim.

[quicksilverNHS]

Wiggles ALL day today. And feet in my cervix, haha. I'm gonna do head-stands to get this kid up outta there

I love this wonderful feeling---this kid is a wild child already!

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[finleyjudemommy]

Totally off topic but does anyone know any mamas on here that make felt food sets or crochet them or anything for a reasonable price?

Thanks!