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Old 12-09-2012, 02:59 PM   #21
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I bet it would stop if they got a few rude comments right back. How about this one ....... "Since the kids we have don't outwardly express any of your genetics we'd be thrilled for more."
Haha! Yes!

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Old 12-10-2012, 06:29 PM   #22
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Re: Super Nosey Family Members

My mom is very vocal about DH needing to "get fixed". We were taking my DS #4 to a follow up appointment when he was 3 DAYS old and she basically cornered and grilled me about it in the waiting room. I eventually told her, "Mom, they are OUR reproductive choices, not yours! Drop it!" She eventually apologized, but I know she's going to flip out when/if we get pregnant with #5. I get what she is saying, I really do. We are very busy people. So I understand what she's saying. But my argument is (and I told her this!)- My children are the only things I'm going to leave behind on this earth. They are my legacy. To me, they are the most important thing I've ever been a part of and we take parenting very seriously. She just doesn't get it.
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Old 12-10-2012, 08:59 PM   #23
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My mom is very vocal about DH needing to "get fixed". We were taking my DS #4 to a follow up appointment when he was 3 DAYS old and she basically cornered and grilled me about it in the waiting room. I eventually told her, "Mom, they are OUR reproductive choices, not yours! Drop it!" She eventually apologized, but I know she's going to flip out when/if we get pregnant with #5. I get what she is saying, I really do. We are very busy people. So I understand what she's saying. But my argument is (and I told her this!)- My children are the only things I'm going to leave behind on this earth. They are my legacy. To me, they are the most important thing I've ever been a part of and we take parenting very seriously. She just doesn't get it.
I just don't understand why our parents think its any of their business. It's like they're sending the message that we can't handle it and or that we were so difficult to handle that they are trying to save us the misery....great feeling

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Old 12-10-2012, 09:17 PM   #24
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Re: Super Nosey Family Members

We only have 3 bio - 2 are adopted. When I was pregnant with #3, DH's aunt asked him, "You know what causes that, right?" DH replied, "Yes, and we enjoy it." She is a more prim and proper person, so she got all red and flustered. Her DH fell over laughing, and said, "Well, you asked!"
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Old 12-10-2012, 09:45 PM   #25
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Re: Super Nosey Family Members

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We only have 3 bio - 2 are adopted. When I was pregnant with #3, DH's aunt asked him, "You know what causes that, right?" DH replied, "Yes, and we enjoy it." She is a more prim and proper person, so she got all red and flustered. Her DH fell over laughing, and said, "Well, you asked!"
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Old 12-16-2012, 12:21 AM   #26
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Re: Super Nosey Family Members

people love to rain on your parade and I think also that they don't realize how rude they're coming off at the time. It's best to smile and be the bigger person and enjoy your blessings.
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Old 12-16-2012, 12:44 AM   #27
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Re: Super Nosey Family Members

My aunt is like that, but she's not complaining when I was pregnant with my daughter. She complains that her daughter-in-law is not using protection so she's pregnant now with her 4th. Her husband (my cousin) is working hard to put food on their table and to save some for his wife's 4th DD and DIL is just a SAHM to her three sons.

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Old 12-16-2012, 10:41 AM   #28
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Re: Super Nosey Family Members

We get it the opposite. My MIL wants a grandson. She had two boys so she wanted her first grand child to be a girl but then after that she was disappointed that the next three were all girls. When my BIL called to tell her their second was a girl she actually said that's too bad it wasn't a boy!

We had our children late and because of her constant comments we just told her that we were not having children. She kept making comments to my SIL that she "hoped I would give her son children, he would be a wonderful father" Like I was the reason we didn't have children. It was both of our decision to wait until we were ready (we started when I was 34). It took 2 years for us to have our girls. And again the comments about how it was a shame that we didn't have boys. She has 4 heathy and gorgeous granddaughters.

After the last thoughtless comment she said to her husband something like "don't look at me I gave you sons" I said well since it is the man who decides the sex of the baby I guess you should blame yourself for creating sons who don't create sons! I was just so mad.

I got a text from my SIL the other day. My neices were staying at my IL's house during Hurricane sandy (they had no power and heat) and she told my SIL that to thank her for watching the girls she could give them a grandson by Christmas. Right in front of my nieces. I felt so bad for them that they should think that they are not good enough because they don't have a penis. It's just crazy to me she cant be happy with 4 beautiful healthy girls. Her sister has 4 boys and NONE of them had children so she has NO grandchildren. So ungrateful for the blessings in her life.
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Old 12-16-2012, 07:04 PM   #29
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We get it the opposite. My MIL wants a grandson. She had two boys so she wanted her first grand child to be a girl but then after that she was disappointed that the next three were all girls. When my BIL called to tell her their second was a girl she actually said that's too bad it wasn't a boy!

We had our children late and because of her constant comments we just told her that we were not having children. She kept making comments to my SIL that she "hoped I would give her son children, he would be a wonderful father" Like I was the reason we didn't have children. It was both of our decision to wait until we were ready (we started when I was 34). It took 2 years for us to have our girls. And again the comments about how it was a shame that we didn't have boys. She has 4 heathy and gorgeous granddaughters.

After the last thoughtless comment she said to her husband something like "don't look at me I gave you sons" I said well since it is the man who decides the sex of the baby I guess you should blame yourself for creating sons who don't create sons! I was just so mad.

I got a text from my SIL the other day. My neices were staying at my IL's house during Hurricane sandy (they had no power and heat) and she told my SIL that to thank her for watching the girls she could give them a grandson by Christmas. Right in front of my nieces. I felt so bad for them that they should think that they are not good enough because they don't have a penis. It's just crazy to me she cant be happy with 4 beautiful healthy girls. Her sister has 4 boys and NONE of them had children so she has NO grandchildren. So ungrateful for the blessings in her life.
That is the most unbelievable and ungrateful thing I've ever read! Gasp!!! So sorry she has done that to y'all.

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Old 12-16-2012, 07:25 PM   #30
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Re: Super Nosey Family Members

I could give you a really long laundry list of dumb things my MIL has said. She is not the smartest woman in the world and she is an old fashioned bigot so at this point I really just find her amusing and good fuel for conversation.

My favorite other story about her...
My SIL had to have her watch her newborn while they went to a wedding. In my MIL's day they used to put babies on their stomachs. Now they have learned that being on their back is best. There are STUDIES to prove this. They have put oxygen monitors on babies that prove their oxygen level drops and that the sleep longer because they are deprived of oxygen. There are studies that say there are 40% less incidents of sids because of back sleeping.

My SIL told her REPEATEDLY to put her on her back to sleep. Even going as far to say for her to at MINIMUM if you remember to do nothing else (on the list they gave her) at least put her on her back to sleep. They go to pick my niece up and she walks in the room and of course she is on her stomach. My SIL and BIL go ballistic! When they ask her why she did that. She said "well she's alive isn't she?" that was her response.

When my twins were born she came to the hospital to see them. In the NICU they put babies on their stomachs after feedings because its easier on digestion. They are wearing monitors so they know if they are in distress. She comes in and sees this and points it out and recounts the story about my SIL and my niece. Like she was now vindicated. I had asked the nurses about that very thing and knew it was for digestion and only because they were premies and premies have less developed digestion and that they did it because they were on oxygen monitors. In addition to that there is always a nurse in the room 24 hours a day.

I tried to explain to her what the nurse told me and she still argued how her sons slept on their stomachs so it was fine to do. But you know what? No matter what she was TOLD from the newborn's PARENTS that the baby is to be put on her back. Bottom line.

I have never met such a stubborn and ignorant woman in my life. Because her sons didn't die of SIDs then it must be better her way. And it's always something like that. She had her son's 40+ years ago. Things have changed! She also used to hit them with an extension cord and a red shoe. She denies it of course. Then she points out how wonderful her sons are so she must be a great parent.

When my daughters started saying the word "no" I sent my ILs a video. They were a little over 12 months. She tells me... now that she knows the word no, hit her on her hand and say "no" so she knows that she is doing something wrong. I just shook my head and said "no, I'm not hitting my ONE YEAR OLD BABIES and teaching them to hit each other".

Im sorry I just hijacked this thread. I have some unresolved issues with my IL's, can you tell? LOL

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