Tantrums in the grocery store

[Erinne]

Originally Posted by firststella Does this exist? (my question is 100% serious!) it does not in Europe, and it might be a pretty good idea!

Haha, yes, this does exist! It's not common, but sometimes I go out of my way to go to a farther away store just for it, and I'm sure others do too. You are allowed to leave 2-6yo for an hour and they color or play, or watch tv. My dd loves it and I do too.

[RainandRedemption]

Originally Posted by firstimemommy44 I would give him one chance to walk, holding into the cart unless you ask him to grab something. Involve him in the shopping. But if he runs off etc he goes right in the cart no questions asked no negotiation and has to stay there until you're done.

Yep, this.

[MommyZ of 2]

I agree with distractions! Ds2, 26 months, never wants to sit in the cart anymore, but I try to schedule my bank trips before going to the grocery store. This way, he has a lollipop-and that gives me about 20 mins if he doesn't bite it!

[abunchoflemons]

at 21 months he should just be told to sit in the cart and be quiet in a firm and straight tone without fussing. We have been talking about this type of stuff in church. But reward should maybe be another idea or walking by helping get/mark off stuff/push cart (like my little one does some) or if you babywear try that.


although it is hard if the tantrum is at end like my oldest did when she saw the toys at the check out and wanted it.... I just wanted to get out of there and not go back but it was a clothing store not grocery though.

[bobbyjk]

Don't forget the positive reinforcement when he does sit well in the seat, too. My DD is 26 months and I try to have her help me "find the bananas" "check the eggs" "put things in the cart (from the seat) and she holds the bags while and counts how many apples I put in, etc. I just continually talk to her about what we are doing to distract her. I don't like to use food to make her sit still, but if she is really squirmy, I do. Right now we point out all the Christmas decorations in the store too.

[DottieHarley]

Originally Posted by Erinne Haha, yes, this does exist! It's not common, but sometimes I go out of my way to go to a farther away store just for it, and I'm sure others do too. You are allowed to leave 2-6yo for an hour and they color or play, or watch tv. My dd loves it and I do too.

OMG this sounds fabulous... daydreaming right now...
DD is almost 2 and has been fighting the grocery cart for about 6 mos.

I make sure she has a snack right before we go. I also bring a snack (usually raisins, a big treat for her) in a zippered snack bag. She looooves the zippered bags and they have magical "keep her in the seat" properties.

If she asks *nicely* to get down, she gets ONE SHOT. No more. While down, she generally wants to help push the cart, standing in front of me/between me and the cart KWIM?) This means lots of non-parents don't see her, only see me saying sweetly "Thank you sweetie, you are a big helper, thank you" seemingly to myself

Bringing along a small bag for her to carry, and maybe put something sturdy in (box of crackers, head of cabbage etc) is sometimes fun.

Mostly, I just make sure I have a super specific list which is in order of the aisles, so that I can zip up and down just the ones I need! The shorter the better.

[itiswhatitis1984]

My advise is going to be a hassle and inconvenient but I used it on two kids (2 & 4) and it worked wonders!! We only went through this process about 3 times before it "clicked" that they weren't going to get away with their behavior. Here it is: when I park the car I turn around and go over the rules (I only really cover problem areas) and tell them they will get one reminder. If I remind them and they continue we will leave the store and they will go home & sit in timeout. Then I'd ask if they understood. Finally I would follow through with it if needed. When I would give them the reminder about what they were doing that was unacceptable I would tell them again if you continue we will go home and you will sit in timeout. That way there were no surprises for them. I don't believe in just leaving a store when a child throws a fit because they are getting their way that's why we go straight home and they sit in timeout. This worked wonders for me and shopping trips quickly became a lot less stressful. My experience was with two boys and both were strong willed! They quickly learned the cause and effect relationship to misbehavior in a store!

[jen_batten]

At that age my kids get the option of walking while holding the cart, or riding in the cart. If they will not hold the cart, then they give up their right to choose and are in the cart for the rest of the store. They learn quick, and they'll walk nicely beside the cart if they want to walk.

[PinkDenial]

This is the OP. You wonderful ladies have so many great suggestions! Today I had to go the store for a few things, and I let him walk so long as he held the cart. He did great and loved it for about 5 minutes. Then he let go and took a step back, giving me a look out of the corner of his eye. So I scooped him up and put him in the cart, and he was fine about it.

I also love the idea of a toddler shopping list. In restaurants, I have given him my phone before. But in the grocery store, I'm too worried that he'll throw it. Also, wearing him is not an option...he is too heavy, and I am pregnant.

I am also daydreaming about a grocery store with childcare!