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Old 01-24-2013, 01:58 PM   #1
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Vent/Rant No, it's not twins. Yes I am sure. Thanks for playing.

(this is meant to be funny AND serious )



I want to wear a shirt that says:

I am pregnant and I am carrying mace. Please think before you speak.

Seriously, on what planet is it ever okay to tell a pregnant lady she's huge? EVER? The word "huge" should NEVER come out of your mouth when you are speaking to a pregnant lady. Ever. I don't care if you literally see the Kool-Aid man running full speed towards you. It's just never okay. Ever.

HUGE is not a pretty word. It doesn't evoke thoughts of dainty, lady-like, attractive people. It doesn't make me think of a calm beach or a peaceful river. It doesn't make me think of the beautiful baby I am working hard to grow, or the yummy newborn I'll soon be holding. It doesn't make me feel comfortable in my own skin....

"HUGE" makes me think of Godzilla smashing buildings and eating New Yorkers. HUGE makes me think of the Nutty Professor eating dinner with his family. HUGE makes me think of Mimi Bobeck off the Drew Carey Show. HUGE conjures up images of Homer Simpson drunk off doughnuts passed out on the console board at the nuclear plant.... drooling....

What would possess a person to EVER use that word to describe a very pregnant woman? Who is already hormonal? Who already has trouble smashing her growing waist like a sausage into the maternity pants that seem to be shrinking everytime she washes them? The preggo lady who has never been overweight her whole life and suddenly has rolls on her back? Why? Why would you select the word "HUGE" to describe her? Is there a lack of adjectives? Do you suffer from a limited vocabulary in addition to your apparent lack of common sense?

Somehow, though, the ghastly offense of calling a very pregnant lady "huge" just pales in comparison to asking her if she is "ABSOLUTELY SURE" she is not having twins.

Really? You honestly think I made it to 33 weeks pregnant, having already birthed 3 other kids, and NOT realized I am carrying twins? Honestly?

It's as if people are expecting THIS response:

"Are you SURE it isn't twins?" ...... Hmmmm *gasp* *look of horror* "OH MY GOSH! YES! YES IT IS! THAT must be why I am so gigantic! THANK YOU! I couldn't figure it out!"

No, people. NO I am not having twins. YES I am COMPLETELY sure. Apparently I'm just larger than life. Don't worry, I won't eat you. I'm not craving idiot.


I'm pregnant. I have hips. I have a big ole booty. I'm spreading wider by the second. And now, I have a big round belly. If you can't avoid commenting on my weight, please turn around, and walk the other direction.

(BTW, I've only gained about 30 lbs, and this entire post is meant to be funny AND serious. And yes, these are real conversations that I have had more than a handful of times with people. Don't get too worked up over it, I was having fun. Sometimes we don't think before we speak, do we? I am so guilty of this, and hope I forever remember not to comment on a pregnant lady's weight. )

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Last edited by Kiliki; 01-24-2013 at 06:11 PM.
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Old 01-24-2013, 02:14 PM   #2
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Re: Vent/Rant No, it's not twins. Yes I am sure. Thanks for playing.

I hate that!! We lost DD1's twin at 31 weeks so it's kind of a painful question for me, though in all fairness most people wouldn't know that, but still. Yes, after 3 ultrasounds I feel confident I am only carrying one baby. Sheesh.
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Old 01-24-2013, 02:19 PM   #3
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Re: Vent/Rant No, it's not twins. Yes I am sure. Thanks for playing.

Quote:
Originally Posted by mibarra View Post
I hate that!! We lost DD1's twin at 31 weeks so it's kind of a painful question for me, though in all fairness most people wouldn't know that, but still. Yes, after 3 ultrasounds I feel confident I am only carrying one baby. Sheesh.
oh no. I am so very sorry.

That thought did not even cross my mind when I posted.
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Old 01-24-2013, 02:38 PM   #4
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Re: Vent/Rant No, it's not twins. Yes I am sure. Thanks for playing.

I think people just feel the need to say something about your pregnancy and can't think of anything better to say. And most people just don't know what "normal" pregnancy looks like or how much variation there is.

When I was 4 or 5 months pregnant and beginning to show, I was asked if I was pregnant with twins (since I'd gotten "so big so fast") and was also asked if I was 2 months pregnant (yeah, cause most people show at 2 months) since I "was so small".

Later, most people commented that I was small (I did measure 2 weeks small most of the pregnancy), but some even implied something must be wrong. I was actually asked by a nurse if I had IUGR since my belly was "so small" at 39 weeks. I gained over 40 pounds, so no, I really wasn't that small, but I'm an average build and my DH isn't a big guy. Our DS was 6#12oz and 19.5 inches and born at 40w2d.

It didn't stop once I delivered. My mother HAS to tell EVERYONE over and over again that my DS is the smallest baby she's ever seen (and then ramble on about how huge her babies were - we were all between 8 and 9 pounds). It drives me nuts because I don't think 8 1/2 pounds is that big and I don't think 6 pounds 12 ounces is exceptionally small. There is a "normal range" after all, and both are in it. And I've been asked by 2 different people (one a stranger in the grocery store) if DS was a preemie. Holy crap people, he's not that small!

Again, people just feel the need to say something. And if they don't have something better to say, they say something stupid!
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Old 01-24-2013, 02:39 PM   #5
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Re: Vent/Rant No, it's not twins. Yes I am sure. Thanks for playing.

Your post cracked me up. You have to be able to just laugh stuff off cuz people are idiots
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Old 01-24-2013, 02:44 PM   #6
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Re: Vent/Rant No, it's not twins. Yes I am sure. Thanks for playing.

I feel EXACTLY the same way!! I have been asked probably 10 times already and I am only 30 weeks!!! The last time was by a nurse in the ER yesterday. I have gained 40 pounds but I only weigh 145!! My BP is already almost 40 points higher than normal and I might snap the next time someone asks me My mom actually got crappy the other day when we went shopping cause someone asked me
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Old 01-24-2013, 02:46 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kiliki

No, people. NO I am not having twins. YES I am COMPLETELY sure. Apparently I'm just larger than life. Don't worry, I won't eat you. I'm not craving idiot.
)
Awesome.
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Old 01-24-2013, 02:58 PM   #8
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Bahahaha! I get the twins comment every.time. I don't mind that one, but "huge" would really sting. Generally, as long as the comment is directed at my belly, and not my thighs, butt, or swollen face, I'm not offended.

I often get "when are you due", followed by "really? You have that long to go?" (Heard as, "you're huge!") I do round out really early with my short torso, flat chest, and big babies. But I am a little insecure this round since my body was a bit softer from the beginning, and I'm gaining at super speed. (I think getting close to 40, ugh). Super tight maternity shirts are not flattering this time.
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Old 01-24-2013, 03:00 PM   #9
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Re: Vent/Rant No, it's not twins. Yes I am sure. Thanks for playing.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kiliki View Post
Don't worry, I won't eat you. I'm not craving idiot.

You are hilarious! I want that on a t-shirt!
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Old 01-24-2013, 03:07 PM   #10
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When I was seven months pregnant with #3 I walked into a Best Buy and the greeter (young guy) made some comment about me having the baby any minute now. I told him I still had two more months and the only thing you should ever say to a pregnant lady is how good she looks. Seriously people just don't say anything!
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