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Old 02-05-2013, 07:26 AM   #1
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Location: Chase, MI
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Shy kids

I am not really sure what to do. DD is really shy. She has always been timid, but her first year she spent in pain and very clingy to me. We always assumed her timidity stems from that. She has been doing fine in kindergarten. She didn't sing during her class Christmas performance which is pretty typical of her. DH talked to her about it but I told him to let it go that she is shy and lecturing her wasn't going to help. He does not understand shyness at all. Anyway she has always been timid and refuses to try a lot of things. Won't climb monkey bars, refused to go down a slide for the longest time, wouldn't do the rock wall at the last b-day party she went to. That kind of thing. She cries and says she is scared. At recess her and her friends chase each other and she tries to play tag with 2 year old ds. Yesterday as class exercise they played tag. Not sure if has a different name or not but its the one where everyone the gets tagged stays in and continues tagging until every is "it". DD did not participate. She told her teacher she was scared then sat and watched. DD told me before we left for school this morning that she didn't want to play it because there were too many people running around. Her teacher stopped me this morning to make sure I was aware and that she told her she was scared. She is a lot like me in that she can be outgoing in small groups but is usually quiet. And wants to disappear in large groups.

i have got to do something about this. It sucks being that shy person all the time. Being left out and not participating because of shyness. I don't want her to live like that but i am not sure I can do anything about it. I didn't come out of my shell until my 20's. I don't want her to feel like she has missed out on things like I do. I understand the feelings- I wouldn't even go to class the 1st day of classes in college because I was terrified to stand up and do the stupid first day of class introductions. Even in elementary school I hated being called on and always froze in school when I was. I just don't know how to help or if I even can. She tests (verbal) as not knowing things that I know she knows because we do them at home. but she won't speak up at school when asked.

I need to sit down with her and find out exactly what the issue is- whether she is being shy and timid or if she is embarrassed because she can't quite keep up. If its the keeping up I might be able to help her with that. She had significant gross motor delays from her milk intolerance not being diagnosed until 1. She had PT for 2 years. She is still borderline gross motor delay and we have the option of PT if we want it. The doc and PT said that as long as she is participating in gross motor stuff in her peer group she can stay out of PT. But if she doesn't then we need to put her back in PT or she is going to drop again. At least if its that i can do something.

how to help a shy and timid kid? She is confident. And we do have her order her food and talk to cashiers and such. One on one or in small groups she is not shy, but larger groups she is. And the more active things are the worse she gets- same way I always was.
SAHM to LR 7/26/07 and IHM 10/6/10, wife to a self proclaimed genius, ex-navy guy. Going places and doing things that I always dreamed of, but never imagined I would.

Last edited by jbug_4; 02-05-2013 at 07:29 AM.
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