Diaper Swappers

AprilluvsCali · 08-19-2007, 12:11 AM

ha. Funny title, I know. But my Father is visiting this weekend, and we don't see each other often. And he has always been very embarrassed since I started growing breasts.
So I have been EBF baby, she's 10 weeks old. And spending the weekend with my dad and 9 y/o half-sister, I'm not gonna stop! My father was very embarrassed, even though i use a two-tank-top method for coverage (it's too hot in texas for a cover, Sorry!) And my half sister started asking questions, "What is she doing?" And my dad said- "oh well it's more convenient than a bottle, since you always have it there", as though BF is a second choice!
So basically I'm just trying to vent a bit, since i don't have any friends with kids, and also maybe get any opinions or advice. I'm spending the next two days with them (and adding my 22 yo brother to the mix), and I know it will only get more awkward to explain my unconditional BF on demand.
thanx guys

Sweet_Fantasy_Fox · 08-19-2007, 12:55 AM

just continue bf that baby, don't think about it mama, just do what comes naturally.
i bf my dd for 16 months and at first it felt awkward to bf in front of anyone, as time passed, i was able to just continue my conversation while i got the baby ready to eat..lol
my dad and brother were used to it and wouldnt even stop talking like they had in the beginning as i know they felt awkward, i also got my mil and sil conformtable with me bf in front of them both, ido cover up and they dont see anything but i think for some people that fact a baby is latched on in front of them makes them feel weird, the way i see it, they aren't embarrassed to eat in front of me or my baby so why should we be embarrassed to eat and feed in front of any of them

you really don't need to explain anything, if your half sister asks questions, be honest and tell her this is the best form of food to give your child and you ove the fact that your body makes the perfect babyfood. it can end up staying in her head and get her to become a BF mama one day

miguelsmama · 08-19-2007, 01:02 AM

I think your doing great! Keep up the nursing and don't feel you need to hide it. I've found the more I've done it (NIP or in front of those who take issue with it) the more it normalizes it. Which frankly sounds ridiculous to me because it is normal. If your comfortable with it I think that sends a message that they can be comfortable with it too. And if your feeling really bold tell your half sister that if she has any questions about BF'ing you would be happy to fill her in. (of course only if you really want to.

FWIW, I also have a 22 yr old brother and for a while he was uncomfortable with my nursing in front of him. He'd make comments in a joking manner and some that I didn't find funny but we had an open dialog about it and he may not be a card carrying Lactavist but he's supportive and respectful.

I know it's hard sometimes but sounds like your doing wonderfully. I hope your able to have a nice visit with your dad and siblings.

Kate

zosiasmama · 08-19-2007, 01:03 AM

I totally agree! Do your best to explain it to your sister, it ma be the only time that she has seen that and is just curious! It is a great lesson for her from her big sister! Danni

AlexandZoesmom · 08-19-2007, 11:21 AM

My little guy (1o weeks also!) is also EBF and I've found it more comfortable for me and others to leave the room to get him latched on then return with him already eating. Then I am not as woried about "exposing" myself

as my little guy isn;t always fast to latch on. That said, I am lucky that my inlaws (who are our closest by family) are very relaxed about it and even my three nephews (14,10, and 7) were very relaxed about it because my sister talked with them about it before they came to visit.

Don;t know how much that helps - but know that you aren;t the only one out there learning to balance what is best for your baby with dealing with others' ideas on the subject!

Hope your visit goes smoothly from here on in

Beth

apmommatnt · 08-19-2007, 12:07 PM

Oh mama! Don't worry about what they think, you are doing what is truly #1 for your little one (and for you). Educate. That is the best and strongest thing we have when teaching people about the importance and beauty of breastfeeding. The more you do it in front of them, the less it will "bother" or affect them...it will essentially, become the norm. This is to everyone really, make sure you are breastfeeding whenever the baby is hungry, public nursing has for so long been frowned upon, and it has made many of us feel like we have to cover up. You are doing a great thing for you and your family by nursing your babe, keep it up!

Coady_Chaos · 08-19-2007, 12:12 PM

ITA with Danni, explain it to your sister, it may be something she is unfamiliar with and your explanation, and exposure to breastfeeding, might be a positive decision for her, for down the road. I never knew anything about breastfeeding, my mother had a baby when I was 15 years old and she breastfed him (she didn't breastfeed me or my other brother, a year younger than I.) I learned to completely accept it, and realized it was the way to go when I was having my first child. Now, 9 children later, I have over 10 years personal brastfeeding experience. I am currently nursing our 5 month old, am an advocate for breastfeeding, volunteering at a breastfeeding support group AND working towards earning my IBCLC. All this from witnessing my mother breastfeeding.

You keep going, and don't worry about ANYTHING!

AprilluvsCali · 08-20-2007, 12:08 AM

Thanks everybody!
Thank you for all the advice and support

cm.thomas · 08-20-2007, 11:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Coady_Chaos

ITA with Danni, explain it to your sister, it may be something she is unfamiliar with and your explanation, and exposure to breastfeeding, might be a positive decision for her, for down the road. I never knew anything about breastfeeding, my mother had a baby when I was 15 years old and she breastfed him (she didn't breastfeed me or my other brother, a year younger than I.) I learned to completely accept it, and realized it was the way to go when I was having my first child. Now, 9 children later, I have over 10 years personal brastfeeding experience. I am currently nursing our 5 month old, am an advocate for breastfeeding, volunteering at a breastfeeding support group AND working towards earning my IBCLC. All this from witnessing my mother breastfeeding.

You keep going, and don't worry about ANYTHING!

Will you come help me bf?!? J/k, I had a really hard time bfing DH#1 and I'm determined to make it at least a year with this lo coming.

Sorry to hijack! To the OP, my dad is the exact same way. Just this weekend, he walked by when my mom and I were swapping pants in the hall and say 'OH'. I told him after two daughters, I have no idea why he's STILL not used to girls in the house! lol! When I was bfing DS #1, I remember he made a comment towards the effect of 'I don't want to hear about my daughter's breastmilk'!

I don't have many words of wisdom, but I just wanted to offer

and let you know, I know exactly how you feel! Keep up the good work mama!

08-19-2007, 12:55 AM	#2
Sweet_Fantasy_Fox *Administrator* ~Proud mommy of 4~ Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: ~West Coast~ USA Posts: 59,435 Ratings: 610 Feedback: 100% My Mood:	Re: Nursing Under Scrutiny just continue bf that baby, don't think about it mama, just do what comes naturally. i bf my dd for 16 months and at first it felt awkward to bf in front of anyone, as time passed, i was able to just continue my conversation while i got the baby ready to eat..lol my dad and brother were used to it and wouldnt even stop talking like they had in the beginning as i know they felt awkward, i also got my mil and sil conformtable with me bf in front of them both, ido cover up and they dont see anything but i think for some people that fact a baby is latched on in front of them makes them feel weird, the way i see it, they aren't embarrassed to eat in front of me or my baby so why should we be embarrassed to eat and feed in front of any of them you really don't need to explain anything, if your half sister asks questions, be honest and tell her this is the best form of food to give your child and you ove the fact that your body makes the perfect babyfood. it can end up staying in her head and get her to become a BF mama one day __________________ Sally, wife to D, mama to D, D, N, & A Join Swagbucks~I've earned $410!! ~My sweet Danae is a Cancer Survivor, 6 years!!~ Last edited by Sweet_Fantasy_Fox; 08-19-2007 at 12:56 AM.

08-19-2007, 01:02 AM	#3
miguelsmama Registered Users Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 219 Ratings: 19 Feedback: 100% My Mood:	Re: Nursing Under Scrutiny I think your doing great! Keep up the nursing and don't feel you need to hide it. I've found the more I've done it (NIP or in front of those who take issue with it) the more it normalizes it. Which frankly sounds ridiculous to me because it is normal. If your comfortable with it I think that sends a message that they can be comfortable with it too. And if your feeling really bold tell your half sister that if she has any questions about BF'ing you would be happy to fill her in. (of course only if you really want to. FWIW, I also have a 22 yr old brother and for a while he was uncomfortable with my nursing in front of him. He'd make comments in a joking manner and some that I didn't find funny but we had an open dialog about it and he may not be a card carrying Lactavist but he's supportive and respectful. I know it's hard sometimes but sounds like your doing wonderfully. I hope your able to have a nice visit with your dad and siblings. Kate __________________ Kate- mama to Miguel 12/04 and Liliana 1/07 Joaquin 9/09

08-19-2007, 01:03 AM	#4
zosiasmama Registered Users Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Lomza, Poland by way of MI Posts: 6,074 Ratings: 48 Feedback: 100% My Mood:	Re: Nursing Under Scrutiny I totally agree! Do your best to explain it to your sister, it ma be the only time that she has seen that and is just curious! It is a great lesson for her from her big sister! Danni __________________ banned for excessive strikes Want to know about making money with ChaCha? Ask me! I made $350 last month!Hits4Pay Want some Moola?

08-19-2007, 11:21 AM	#5
AlexandZoesmom Registered Users Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Adirondack Mountains Posts: 1,848 Ratings: 123 Feedback: 100% My Mood:	Re: Nursing Under Scrutiny My little guy (1o weeks also!) is also EBF and I've found it more comfortable for me and others to leave the room to get him latched on then return with him already eating. Then I am not as woried about "exposing" myself as my little guy isn;t always fast to latch on. That said, I am lucky that my inlaws (who are our closest by family) are very relaxed about it and even my three nephews (14,10, and 7) were very relaxed about it because my sister talked with them about it before they came to visit. Don;t know how much that helps - but know that you aren;t the only one out there learning to balance what is best for your baby with dealing with others' ideas on the subject! Hope your visit goes smoothly from here on in Beth __________________ Wife to David Mom to Alex (6/07) and Aidan (10/09) dogmom to Zoe Dragonfly Gifts: Gift baskets, baby blankets, cloth napkins, and more! Use code DSMAMA for 10% off!

08-19-2007, 12:07 PM	#6
apmommatnt Registered Users Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: In HOT and SUNNY Arizona! Posts: 565 Ratings: 51 Feedback: 100% My Mood:	Re: Nursing Under Scrutiny Oh mama! Don't worry about what they think, you are doing what is truly #1 for your little one (and for you). Educate. That is the best and strongest thing we have when teaching people about the importance and beauty of breastfeeding. The more you do it in front of them, the less it will "bother" or affect them...it will essentially, become the norm. This is to everyone really, make sure you are breastfeeding whenever the baby is hungry, public nursing has for so long been frowned upon, and it has made many of us feel like we have to cover up. You are doing a great thing for you and your family by nursing your babe, keep it up!