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Old 03-28-2013, 09:48 PM   #121
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Re: How mad would you be?

I wouldn't be mad about a name. I would, however, be mad that someone close to me went out of their way to assure me not to worry about using "my" name, and then they did it anyway. THAT is what would peeve me to no end. Sometimes names just click with people, totally fine. I get that. There are a million other Williams and Benjamins in the world. But if my SIL made it a point to reassure me of something, and then just went on ahead and was all LOLJK TOTES DOIN DIS! I'd be very angry, for a very long time.

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Old 03-28-2013, 11:26 PM   #122
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It wouldn't bother me at all. I don't believe anyone has rights to a claim a name. As a matter of fact, we don't discuss names with anyone... Not our parents or friends... It's top secret around here. Your issue is one of the many reasons that we choose to keep just between us. Heck, we don't even tell them it's a boy or girl; we introduce the family members to Baby (insert name) when they get to the hospital... Lots of suspense!

As far as your issue, maybe they looked at their sweet baby girl and said "Hmm, I don't think she looks like a Julie. Yeah, she's definitely a Lauren!" Or maybe, they didn't know how to break the news to you the were going to use the name. I mean, if you were that concerned/adamant you didn't want them to use the name that you brought it up 3 or 4 times while they were pregnant, maybe they just didn't know what to say.

I'm sure it was not intentional, in the sense it wasn't done to hurt/spite you, but quite possibly they didn't feel like challenging you on the issue, KWIM.
Let me put it this way, if it were me and you, I would have listened to you address it the first time and then answered, "ya I don't know, that's a nice name, we haven't decided."

Since it happened with "Jack", I probably would have said, "Oh, can I name this baby too?" When baby #3 comes along, I wouldn't be able to bite my tongue! Seriously, you're like the baby name generator!!

At best, you can be thrilled you have a healthy niece who you planted the seed to name. At worst, frustrated and hurt. I hope you find peace with the situation.
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Old 03-29-2013, 01:39 AM   #123
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I would still name my dd Lauren.
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Old 03-29-2013, 01:43 AM   #124
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And yes it would bother me. If I told people I was naming dd Nevermore and sil decided to use it I probably would disown her
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Old 03-29-2013, 01:51 AM   #125
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Old 03-29-2013, 02:02 AM   #126
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Re: How mad would you be?

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Originally Posted by Hillargh View Post
I wouldn't be mad about a name. I would, however, be mad that someone close to me went out of their way to assure me not to worry about using "my" name, and then they did it anyway. THAT is what would peeve me to no end. Sometimes names just click with people, totally fine. I get that. There are a million other Williams and Benjamins in the world. But if my SIL made it a point to reassure me of something, and then just went on ahead and was all LOLJK TOTES DOIN DIS! I'd be very angry, for a very long time.
Yeah...
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Old 03-29-2013, 06:56 AM   #127
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And yes it would bother me. If I told people I was naming dd Nevermore and sil decided to use it I probably would disown her
IMO this is totally different. Your dds name is incredibly unique, and nearly unheard of. If you shared it with those close to you and someone then used it, I would be FUMING mad.

Lauren is SO common though. And it's a beautiful name! I think it's absurd to feel you can put claim on a name at all. Is it tacky that thy used it knowing it was the name you'd chosen for possible future children? YES!! And I get that your disappointed. But honestly, you don't know what the future holds and I'd let it go and move on.
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Old 03-29-2013, 08:08 AM   #128
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Old 03-29-2013, 08:53 AM   #129
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I don't get why you told her any names in the first place. I mean, that just sounds like planting the seed, maybe she would have never even thought of that name.
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Old 03-29-2013, 10:15 AM   #130
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I can totally see it being a last minute decision for them. My cousin has had her kids names picked out forever. I don't like them for my kids so no big deal. Anyway we were having trouble with middle names and she told us to use Grace even though she was going to use Gracie if she ever had a girl (her mom, my aunts middle name is Grace). I thought about it but wasn't thrilled with how it played out with her first and last name. I hadn't planned on using it and was going to pick one from our original list.

Fast forward...I'm in the hospital and had DD the day before. The lady calls up to say that she will be up to pick up our birth cert paper soon. So I hobbled my newly c-sectioned self to the bathroom since my ex was in the shower. I told him we needed a middle name NOW. He just looked at me for a few seconds with a blank face. I said "Grace?" and he instantly got this huge grin. I sighed and walked back and put her name down as Hailey Grace. I had absolutely no plan to use that name.

My cousin is pregnant with her second child, gender unknown. If its a girl she has decided on Lanie Grace calling her Lanie instead of Gracie. Lanie Grace...Hailey Grace...who cares? We don't. I have always loved the name Elaina and I would still use it and even call her Lainie. My cousin wouldn't care. Also her first born is William called Will and we have a cousin named William Spencer called Spencer. One named after a grandfather, one named after a father who was named after the grandfather. Anyway, just to say its not a huge deal and they totally could have decided last minute.

Eta: I know my DD will be so thrilled to share a middle name with her cousin. I hope my cousin has a girl so they can share the name.
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