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Old 04-11-2013, 11:27 AM   #1
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Honest answers needed

We move next summer and we make our dream sheet of places we'd like to be sent this Fall. Researching homeschooling in those states or schools in those cities will be a big part of our decision making. I'm really, really struggling with my ability to homeschool. It's really hard because I've wanted to since before we had kids. We have good reasons to do it. But I'm lacking confidence in myself. If you struggled with wondering if you were a good fit to homeschool your kids, could you tell me your reasons and how you overcame them?

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Old 04-11-2013, 12:08 PM   #2
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I have never met a homeschooling mom that didn't at some point question their ability to homeschool. I think we are so ingrained with the idea that someone else would be a better teacher for our kids that the thought of taking on that responsibility is scary. In my experience though, I know that no teacher in a PS will EVER know or love my children the way I do. And because I truly have my children's best interests at heart (not a salary or meeting guidelines or making a quota), I know that I can teach them in a way no stranger ever could. I'm not bashing teachers here, please don't get me wrong. You have to really love kids to want to be a teacher! But they can never know a child as intimately as a parent does.

So don't be afraid! The beauty of homeschooling is the ability to tailor it to your family's needs. If you are uncomfortable starting out, I found that a good step by step curriculum (with lesson plans already done!) goes a long way in boosting confidence.
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Old 04-11-2013, 12:31 PM   #3
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Re: Honest answers needed

HSing was never on my radar until our oldest son was born with some health issues. I was still working full time and my coworkers knew his issues and asked me what we were going to do about school. I hadn't really thought about it but I just said I guess we could homeschool if we had to From then on the idea stuck with me and as his health didn't improve it became more of a reality.

My struggles with homeschool are that I never even pictured myself as a stay at home mom, much less a homeschooling mom. I like to spend time with other adults or time by myself quietly. This is terrible but I don't feel like I'm really gifted at working with kids. I never babysat or was one of those people to get excited about others having babies. I hadn't even really planned to get pregnant with DS1. DH and I had been married for 6 years and most people assumed we didn't want children. I get REALLY frustrated by the constant questions and need for attention, the lack of alone time, the health issues, and feeling of always having something to do. I want to be one of those people with a spotless house but it never seems to happen. I want to be one of those people that doesn't get frustrated when they're trying to take a minute to themselves but can't seem to get one...but I'm not. I want to be one of those creative moms that can go with the flow but I'm not a very laid back person. I want to have my husband come home to dinner and children quietly reading books (yeah right!). There are A LOT of things that I don't love about homeschooling...hey, you asked for honesty! But, I figure this is a short blip on the radar of my life and right now this is what I'm called to. It's my ministry...even though I feel like a failure a lot of times God will give me a glimmer here and there that lifts my spirits and encourages me. I think He's teaching me through HSing just as much as I'm teaching my kids. It's slowly making me into the person He wants me to be...very slowly! I wish I could snap my fingers and be this perfect 50's housewife but right now I'm sitting in my PJ's letting my little one watch Barney...I should be working but I'm goofing off online...and we'll probably rummage through the house and eat leftovers tonight.

Homeschooling is tough but I know it's the right decision for our family. My kids will be better for it and hopefully I'll keep my sanity in the process!

Last edited by 7mom7; 04-11-2013 at 12:35 PM.
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Old 04-11-2013, 12:45 PM   #4
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I did at first.


It's not an easy job. Constantly getting questioned by people about what and when my kids are learning, as if they are trying to prove a point that district schools are better. (Which is not true, lol)

Most of my kids are ahead, but I have one that is struggling. The great thing is that she isn't being judged here at home. If she were in school it would be a huge issue.

The more and more we get into homeschooling I am confident in my choice. I see the way other kids behave and what they learn at school and realize that we have made the right choice for our family.

And you know what gets me over the hump on bad days? The fact that I am watching my kids grow up in my home, with my values and no one else's. I see them and how smart they are, what areas they excel In and what areas they need help. I cannot imagine my kids being gone for 7 hours a day, then coming home to do homework, dinner and bedtime. It seems like such a waste of a childhood to me. My kids spend the morning do school work (before privileges) then the rest of the day playing in the yard, reading books, playing dress up, running around being kids. It is so worth it. . I know in 18 years it will really pay off.
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Old 04-11-2013, 01:00 PM   #5
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Re: Honest answers needed

I'll be honest, I don't LOVE homeschooling. I'm disorganized, I am lazy, I'd rather clean my house than sit and read a book, I am seriously lacking in the patience department....

But, the truth is that when I look at public schools, I just don't want my kids there. I don't want them exposed to that kind of stuff. I realize it makes me sound judgmental. Call it whatever you will. But I just don't want my kids to learn to learn all of the GARBAGE (and it is pure garbage) that I see in the social structure of Public Schools.

Besides that, I think I hear about some new scandal in a public school once a month, if not more. A teacher smacking a student, a student beating up a teacher, cops being called b/c a 6 y/o is uncontrollable, teachers having sex with students, students having sex on school property, teen pregnancies, abortions, gang violence, drugs being done/sold on campus,, guns being brought to schools, bomb threats, shootings.....

No thank you. Not for my kids.

I'll give them my best attempt at making them educated, well-rounded, KIND, people. And for all my failings and short-comings, I still think I will do better by them than I would be by putting them in PS.

My kids are ahead academically so far, and are LIGHT years ahead of other kids the same age for maturity level.

Dislike it as I may, it's the best thing for my kids and our family, so I'll do it!

Last edited by Kiliki; 04-11-2013 at 01:03 PM.
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Old 04-11-2013, 01:14 PM   #6
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Re: Honest answers needed

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kiliki View Post
I'll be honest, I don't LOVE homeschooling. I'm disorganized, I am lazy, I'd rather clean my house than sit and read a book, I am seriously lacking in the patience department....

But, the truth is that when I look at public schools, I just don't want my kids there. I don't want them exposed to that kind of stuff. I realize it makes me sound judgmental. Call it whatever you will. But I just don't want my kids to learn to learn all of the GARBAGE (and it is pure garbage) that I see in the social structure of Public Schools.

Besides that, I think I hear about some new scandal in a public school once a month, if not more. A teacher smacking a student, a student beating up a teacher, cops being called b/c a 6 y/o is uncontrollable, teachers having sex with students, students having sex on school property, teen pregnancies, abortions, gang violence, drugs being done/sold on campus,, guns being brought to schools, bomb threats, shootings.....

No thank you. Not for my kids.

I'll give them my best attempt at making them educated, well-rounded, KIND, people. And for all my failings and short-comings, I still think I will do better by them than I would be by putting them in PS.

My kids are ahead academically so far, and are LIGHT years ahead of other kids the same age for maturity level.

Dislike it as I may, it's the best thing for my kids and our family, so I'll do it!
Love your honesty, glad I'm not alone
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Old 04-11-2013, 03:46 PM   #7
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Re: Honest answers needed

I didn't actually originally make the decision to homeschool. DH was homeschooled and he said we would do the same. I was a bit nervous at first, but then someone pointed out to me that as a mom I had already been "schooling" my kids. I (and DH, of course) had taught them how to dress themselves, what healthy foods were, how to ride a bike, climb a tree, correctly handle books, how to do a kazillion other things, including their colors and letters just through living. Yes, I asked advice from other people, but there is no reason you can't do that with homeschooling.

As to why we stuck with it, there are a lot of reasons. One of the big ones is the fact that we are military. I moved a lot as a child and had many gaps in my education as a result of different schools doing things in different orders. I didn't want my kids to have that.

Now, do I always love homeschooling? No, but I never dislike it. I love that we don't have a strict schedule because I don't do well on schedules. Thrive on routine, but absolutely detest schedules. I run out of patience with my kids and some days I don't teach well and they don't learn well. If they were in public school and I was helping them with homework, We would have the same problem. But, by having them at home, we can work through that however we need to, we can adjust things, work with their learning styles, and if we need to, we take a break.
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Old 04-11-2013, 03:58 PM   #8
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Re: Honest answers needed

I have wanted to homeschool since I first found out it was an option on diaperswappers. I was pregnant with ds and I never knew people still homeschooled their children.

As the time got closer to when he was supposed to start school I felt SO overwhelmed. There are SO many choices! I didn't know what curriculum we would choose, what approach I would be taking (unschooling, classical, etc)... It was a lot.

Finally I told myself that I could either send him to school, which I felt was the absolute wrong choice for our family, or I could buy a couple of workbooks, find some websites I liked for free printables, and teach him myself. I had already taught him to walk, talk, use the bathroom, colors, number, alphabet, etc. so why should anything else be harder?

Since I already knew nothing but homeschooling was an option for me, I set to work figuring out what we would do. Fortunately ds was already above kindy level when he started kindergarten, so I was able to figure out what would work and what wouldn't without having him fall behind.

When I set my mind on something I take the approach that it has to be done, and since I can not fail, how can I make sure I succeed?

There are plenty of times when I wonder if I am cut out for this. But I know I am making the right choice for my children, so we keep plugging along!
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Old 04-12-2013, 05:55 AM   #9
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Thanks everyone. This helps.

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Old 04-12-2013, 10:40 AM   #10
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I am def on the same boat, feel u mamma!

I am struggling with my 9yr old and 4 yr old. I also have a 10mo old, all boys! We struggle on a daily basis. My oldest especially, he is super smart, but has no drive, or care about anything these days. It is really rubbing off on my 4 yr old, who is awesome with his school and super ahead for his age. My hubs gets a taste of it on Fridays bc he is off and says I am a saint and doesn't know if he could do it! Yes, today is Friday and it has been rough!!
For any others, how do u get ur gets to want to learn?? I try to incorporate things they are interested in, but we never get to the fun stuff bc they refuse to do the very small amount of stuff that I make mandatory everyday. It's like a page of math, 30 min of reading and a writing assignment for the oldest, math, reading to me and together for the younger, and writing a few words/spelling. I don't think that is asking too much. It should only take maybe 2 hours, but ends up taking until almost 3pm!! And I always tell them and they know as soon as their work is done they get to go outside and play or go to playground, etc. but it's not motivating enough I guess.
Oh well sorry for my rant. And I as well as these other mothers understand ur worries and struggles!
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