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Old 09-17-2007, 01:48 PM   #11
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Re: Anyone have family really upset about having another baby??

My Grandmother will be ticked so I am not calling to tell her~

She'll figure it out when I send pictures

I am sorry they are being mean to you!!!

When it comes out just go WAYYYY overboard talking about how excited you all are and how blessed you feel you are.

Also,I'd try my hardest to get your sis paid off as quick as you can (probably to the point of even taking out a small loan at the bank depending on how much is owed)

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Old 09-17-2007, 02:01 PM   #12
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Re: Anyone have family really upset about having another baby??

So sorry to hear this. My family totally freaks out whenever we announce a new baby is coming (they have done this since #5). We actually didn't tell my Dad about #6 until I was about 7 mo along. He had congestive heart failure and we didn't want to give him a heart attack and be blamed for it . He passed away when she was about 6 weeks old.

Personally I think it is no ones business but yours and your dh's. I would politely (or not) tell them that it is your decision and not theirs.

to you.
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Old 09-17-2007, 02:49 PM   #13
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Re: Anyone have family really upset about having another baby??

Sorry to hear that you have people being jerks. I've found that in general with number 4 is when people tend to hear the most numerous rude, insulting, hateful comments about pregnancies. for some reason, people seem to think maybe they can reason with you or makes you come to your senses or something. Just wanted to say I'm sorry you had to deal with idiotic comments and congratulations on your newest blessing.
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Old 09-17-2007, 02:57 PM   #14
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Re: Anyone have family really upset about having another baby??

my family isnt "upset" perse-- they are more like

get your tubes tied already! (well i dont find it funny, but sometimes i do)

I have alot of problems with my pregnancies and i think they are just worried and dont want me to keep having problems. I have said this is the last baby and even talked to my OB about getting my tubes tied- but yet in the back of my mind as i get closer- im like " im not quite done yet". Of course, would i walk up to my family and say that? heck no. DHs family doesnt really talk to us for other reasons but his grandparents are just like "ok whatever" although this weekend Grandma in law did ask if i was getting my tubes tied.- i try to avoid her bantering.

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I only have 1 brother--- he has 1 daughter and 1 son.
DH is the ONLY child by his mom- so no other kids there.

so my parents have (so far) 3 granddaughters, 2 grandsons. DHs mom has 2 granddaughters and 1 step-grandson.

my moms side of the family is HUGE, my dads side is small and so is DHs.... i feel like setting a new "trend" LOL (im kidding)

Last edited by Birdof1985; 09-17-2007 at 06:29 PM.
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Old 09-17-2007, 03:11 PM   #15
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Re: Anyone have family really upset about having another baby??

DH's family has never been excited about ANY of the 5 pregnancies (with #1 my MIL said omg you're pregnant- we were married btw)- actually they found out about #3 at the same time as they were told I had m/c.
My Mom is always excited- so at least we have that.
The little bean that I'm 13 weeks along with wasn't planned- we pretty much had just decided that we would like to have #4 and were discussing what would be a good time- as in waiting at LEAST a few months and bam I'm pg! It was easier to tell that way because at least we didn't plan it this way- it softens the blow- I think. I know it's wrong to feel that way but dh didn't even want to tell his family at all! My SIL said- are you crazy? when she found out about this one.
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Old 09-17-2007, 03:22 PM   #16
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Re: Anyone have family really upset about having another baby??

We have found telling my family it was an accident or we were on bc. condoms and tubes cut tied and burnt the only way they don't overreact. My mom constantly throws it is my face that she had 1 kid for a reason...(she couldn't find a sperm donor for #2 is the truth behind it). My aunt just doesn't like my name choices. I now don't tell them anything until I get my 'ohh ****' lie straightened out.

DHs family bugged us since DD#3 was about 5 months old when we were going to have #4. At that time we weren't sure if there was going to be a #4. They were excited to hear he was on his way.

And so help me god if I hear "you're done now right??" I'm going to punch them in the face with my non swollen, boney, mens size glove 11 hands!!!!!
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Old 09-17-2007, 04:24 PM   #17
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Re: Anyone have family really upset about having another baby??

OMG, I feel the same way. I'm not even pregnant yet and I'm getting crap from my sister and my mom. My dad thinks it would be great to have another grandchild. If he could decide I think he would want me to have a dozen, thankfully he doesn't get to make that decision. My sister tells me when I talk about having #3 that 3 is like having a litter (like I'm a dog.) WHATEVER!!! She says I won't be able to give the 2 I already have the life they need. Material things aren't everything. She's single and in college so I can't really relate to where she's coming from. How can you not want more than 2? I've always wanted 4 so will see how that one goes over. It really gets on my nerves, I have nicely and not nicely told her to Back the H**L off and she's not the one who has to raise then anyway. My mom thinks that because she only had 2 that I should only have 2. I guess that's my rant.
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Old 09-17-2007, 04:34 PM   #18
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Re: Anyone have family really upset about having another baby??

HEHEHE We are "The Clan"!!!

SIL #1 has 5
SIL #2 has 2
BIL #1 has 1 (so far)
BIL #2 has 2 (so far)
DH has almost 4
BIL #3 is in the seminary
SIL #3 is down Syndrome
BIL #4 is just out of HS
BIL #5 is down Syndrome

Niece #1 just had her first today...

my MIL and FIL now have almost 14 grandchildren and 1 GGranddaughter...they still have 4 of their own children having kids and now the grandchildren are starting.
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Old 09-17-2007, 04:44 PM   #19
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Re: Anyone have family really upset about having another baby??

Thanks everyone!

First thing - The only reason my dad told me is because he said he knew my sister would probably be calling me in a couple of days trying to make me feel bad so he wanted to give me a heads up to prepare if I needed. I'm really glad he told me because at least I know how she feels.

My husband just had to go take something over to my moms that we had for her and they treated him like a delivery boy and didn't even talk to him. Just took the package and said bye I just don't understand how people can be so upset about a little baby. DH and I are finally on our way out of our bad financial situation and my sister will be paid back fully by the end of the year. DH works for an awesome company right now and the pay is really good, by next year we will be completely out of debt and in a really good place. Of course my sister is very material and and I"m not, I don't care if we can't go to Disney World every year or if my kids are wearing designer clothes all I care about is that they are happy and healthy and they are!
I don't know if I'll ever be able to get over this, even if they come around the hurt from the way they are treating me right now stings more than I could imagine. I just can't even fathom 10 yrs from now when my then son or daugther ask why we don't see Ma-maw or Aunt Jenny and I have to come up with a lie so I don't have to tell them "its because they didn't want me to have you"

It just sucks all the way around
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Old 09-17-2007, 05:09 PM   #20
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Re: Anyone have family really upset about having another baby??

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Originally Posted by TwinKristi View Post
There are always people who are trying to steal your happiness, you just need to ignore it!! I know it's easier said (or typed ) than done, but you have to in order to keep your happiness alive!! Who cares what they think, it's YOUR family and YOUR baby!! You are doing the right thing in paying back the money they loaned you, but jeeze, it's not like you have to have your ovaries submitted as collateral when you get a loan from anyone else?? Why would they get to chose what you can and cannot do now?? It's not like you're living on the streets and can't afford to even pay them back. They just need to HUSH UP!! I'm sure there are a few family members who wouldn't be so happy if we have #6, but I don't care!! We will love that baby just like our other 5 and if they have something to say about it than they can say it to someone else and live with the consequences.
I agree wholeheartedly and once people realize that you don't care what they say, they will usually shut up. I agree with a T-shirt idea people know right away that you don't care what they say, you love this baby dearly. For ages when people have asked how many we are gonna have dh has said "a dozen" it really throws people off. We got quite a few comments with #3, we had a boy and girl. With #4 we had had an ectopic pregnancy that ruptured so people let us off the hook like we were trying to replace that one. With this one I think they gave up hope of convincing us of anything and just think we have lost it~ we do get funny looks but not much more for comments. We also prepare people that we are hoping for another way ahead of time.
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