Single Mommy Woes

[EmnJJsMom]

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[Okiemunchkinsmom]

Do you feel she is confused because she thinks all men in leather jackets are her dad? I'm sorry, I'm not sure what you mean by her confusion, and I'm not trying to be a jerk, I just can't think of a way to ask that doesn't read like that to me.

It sounds to me as if it's time to start talking about her dad. Even if he isn't a participating member of her life he will forever be her dad. Pretending as if he doesn't exist is setting her up for more confusion, imo. I'm not in the same situation exactly, but I do have children who have "other" parents who are not involved in their lives. We talk about things matter of factly, and age appropriately. Some of these "other" parents were/are not good people and nobody I'd want my children around. BUT, I do think it's good to show my children that I respect that part of them. After all, if I talk badly, or not at all about the "others" when those "others" are a part of my children it could make them feel bad about themselves.

I'm sorry your in this position, I know it must be tough.

[EmnJJsMom]

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[bethkay]

I was a single mom with my oldest daughter and remarried when she was about 18months. She has no contact with her biological dad.

I just tell my oldest that her biological father helped me created her and then he had to go on to do other things. She is 8 years old now and has been fine with that explanation for now.

If it was me, I would not let her have contact or visites with him, just because he sounds like he had an abusive personality. I'd say he gave you some great kids and that now he had to move on.

Hope it all works out.

Beth