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Old 08-11-2006, 04:53 AM   #11
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Re: Aunt says feed him "real food" now????

I guess we're all defensive about the way we do things; by your 8th time, it's not about understanding the facts. My mom, who has 8 grandchildren, has only recently dropped the "you're starving them" line about no solids before 6 months.

On the other hand, I'm not willing to go along with everything my pediatrician says about starting vitamins at birth, never cosleeping, etc. either!


Linda -- proud mom of Rachel (20), Joshua (15), Elisheva (7), and Moshe (3), and 2 wonderful grown stepdaughters.
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Old 08-11-2006, 06:12 AM   #12
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Re: Aunt says feed him "real food" now????

Although I wouldn't do this to someone I love (like a relative), I have a whole repertoire of sweet, smart-aleck comments to give the total strangers who approach me in the grocery store with unsolicited advice.

One time someone gave me the line, "Oh, we fed OUR babies cow's milk and real food at 3 months and THEY were fine!" and I just gasped and said, "Oh, your poor babies! Aren't you so glad that with the newer technology and more understanding about babies these days we can do so much better?"

He,he. [I always say things like that sweetly, so it usually takes people a minute or two to realize I'm being rude.]

One thing I have actually taken quite a bit of flack for has been . . . car seats! As in, buckling them EVERY TIME, even for a 1/2 mile drive down the street. Had to tell my (normally WONDERFUL) MIL that if she didn't have time to buckle them, then they didn't have time to visit.
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Old 08-11-2006, 06:45 AM   #13
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Re: Aunt says feed him "real food" now????

I usually just say things like, "You did what worked for you, we do what works for us." Sometimes I even try to smile while I am saying it, sometimes I'm just too irritated. You are probably right though, the questions were probably prompted by her being uncomfortable.

The carseat thing is crazy. You usually don't get much argument about those; but my mom did ask the other day if ds could ride with just a seatbelt yet, I just replied, "no, not until he's 80 pounds". I couldn't remember what the law says, but she got the point that there was no wiggle room on that issue with me.

Oh, and my mom did try to give my dd sweet tea when she was 7 months old. I promptly removed her from her arms and didn't let her hold her for the rest of the day. She said, "Well she wanted a drink." And my dd is allergic to dairy and soy and probably a whole host of other things. I think they just don't think sometimes.
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Old 08-11-2006, 07:33 AM   #14
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Re: Aunt says feed him "real food" now????

Alivia is getting reay to turn 5 months on the 19th...sniff, sniff.....and my new comment to everyone is
"if you put that in her mouth it is on!!!!!"
and they know I mean it too!
Even DH wants to give her solids, only because he wants to be ably to feed her too. But they aren't trying to give her something natural and good for her kinda stuff. We are talking ice cream and pudding and stuff like that. Absolutely not, no way!!
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Old 08-11-2006, 07:39 AM   #15
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Re: Aunt says feed him "real food" now????

I've stopped with the "Dr says..." line and I don't say how long I'll EBF or when I'll add cereal or whatever. They offer advice and question because they care and because they are trying to make conversation with you about parenting since they know thats what your life IS right now. They ruffle our feathers, bit not intentionally. Most good moms, from every generation, know this: babies do things when they are ready and babies will tell you what they need. So I say "really? its amazing how different babies can be isn't it? Each of my kids has done things in their own way in their own time, did you notice that with your kids?" and then they will tell you about Tommy who walked at 9 months and never crawled, and Sally who wouldn't take a step before 15 months, remember little Angie? she toilet trained herself at a year! But Robby wet the bed until he was 9... Mostly they just want to chat baby talk. If it comes back to food I'll say "my mother fed us cereal in our bottles the day we came home from the hospital and we drank it right up" (this is true and while I don't con done it it makes the other person feel better and takes away their defensiveness) then I'll say "but little Joe just isn't ready for that, I'll respect his time tables and feed him as soon as he is ready" it says, in effect, "I know you did your best and no one was harmed. I do care about my child and am respecting his growth" and thats usually all they need to hear. She's old enough that she's not likely to be parenting a baby soon, therefore there's really no need to "educate" her IMO.
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