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Old 09-26-2006, 11:34 PM   #1
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How to end the cosleeping relationship?

DD#1 is 3.5 y/o - she's still part-time cosleeping (she starts the night in her room and then comes to ours) and I'm ready for it to be over. We have a king size bed and DH, myself and DD#2 (15 mos) We've been telling her for a long time (at least 6 mos) that she's to stay in her bed until "the sun wakes up" and, without fail, she's in our room every night. It wasnt' bad when she wasn't showing up until 5 am or so, but now she's barely lasting an hour or two in her own bed. The problem is that she's constantly tossing and turning, keeping us fromsleeping well, and she's always thrashing on poor DD#2, who is then awake and screaming, and then I'm awake, and then DH is awake. DH was supposed to be putting her back in her bed every night since I have to deal with DD#2s night wakings, but he's since slacked off in that department. We tried giving her a bed in our room to sleep in so that she doesn't disturb us, but that didn't work - she refused to sleep in it. DH is a big softy and thinks that putting up the baby gate is cruel (which I SORT-OF do too, but our bedroom and her room are directly across from each other, so if she woke up upset we'd hear her and go comfort her) I thought about putting an alarm in her room and setting it to a quiet station and telling her she can't come in our room until the music is on - but I'm pretty sure she'd just ignore it (as she has ignored the "sun wakes up" rule) I'm thinking that the consensus is going to be that we need to let her keep sleeping with us - and if it's really the best thing we can do for her, so be it. I REALLY REALLY want some space back in my bed though.... HELP MEEEEEEEEEE

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Old 09-26-2006, 11:36 PM   #2
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Re: How to end the cosleeping relationship?

My sister did not stop sleeping with my mom and step-dad until a year ago...she is 12! lol That won't be you. Try making her bed something all her own....let her pick out a comforter or pillow case...something like that. Also, a cute night light too!
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Old 09-27-2006, 01:06 PM   #3
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Re: How to end the cosleeping relationship?

Is the old enough to do a chart where she gets a sticker on it every time she stays in bed until the sun wakes up? If she gets so many stickers, she could get a special treat - kind of like you do with a potty chart?
My SIL gives her 3 yo son a flashlight to take into bed with him, which has helped them with scary shadows, etc.
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Old 09-27-2006, 01:19 PM   #4
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Re: How to end the cosleeping relationship?

Could there be a reason for the change of sleep habits? Any thing scary she has seen or a possible medical reason she might be uncomfortable?
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Old 09-27-2006, 03:21 PM   #5
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Re: How to end the cosleeping relationship?

It's been a very gradual slope to her waking earlier and earlier to come in our room. It took a couple months for her to go from coming in our room at 5am to coming in our room at 11pm. She seems to be healthy, happy and otherwise secure, but nighttimes are constantly a battle. Thanks everyone for the advice, keep it coming!

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Old 09-28-2006, 09:20 AM   #6
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Re: How to end the cosleeping relationship?

I have no advice but i'm watching this thread LOL! My 5yo dd still sleeps in our bed and according to her she has no intentions of leaving anytime soon. We've tried getting her a new bed with Carebear bedding, a new lamp to leave on, a nightlight, leaving a radio on, even tried leaving a tv on....Nothing keeps her in there! She screams screams screams! Not just a normal 'fussy I'm trying to get my way' scream but like she is truly terrified to be alone in her room. My older son is almost 10 and we've tried letting them sleep in the same room but she will stay in there till he goes to sleep then comes into our room. I really dont' know what to do. But my dh doesn't like it at all that she's there. But he is no help in getting her out either. Our room isn't really big enough to have another bed in with us. So anyways sorry to hijack your thread but i'll be watching for some ideas as well
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Old 09-28-2006, 03:37 PM   #7
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Re: How to end the cosleeping relationship?

I can't offer any advice as my daughter didn't want to sleep with me so I didn't have the problem, but It's interesting to read! Wonder if having her sister in there has anything to do with it?
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