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Old 04-22-2008, 09:57 PM   #1
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Question DD refusing to bowel train! Advice PLEASE!

OK! My DD potty refuses to have a bm on the potty. She potty learned a week after her second birthday. No problems with bladder training with the exception of occassional, normal setbacks and accidents. However, she refuses to bowel train. We let it go in the beginning, not wanting to push her, but it's almost a year later and she still refuses. She'd rather be constipated than go in her undies, as she knows she can't do that. We have tried everything! Prizes to punishment, you name it. NOTHING works! I know she won't be 16 and still refusing, but seriously! How can I speed this along? Anyone have the same problem? What did you do?

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Old 04-23-2008, 12:01 AM   #2
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Re: DD refusing to bowel train! Advice PLEASE!

my ds did this too. He peed on the potty and was consistent at 2 but would cry for a diaper when he had to poop. Just put a dipe on him....Only lasted about 4 months though. We just talked about why?? like if he was scared, he was. said it was okay, you will go when your ready . no rewards or punishments. Just let him take his time. I thought it was going to be a year and one day he woke up, when he was about 2y4mo. and said " I think I will go poop on the potty today" I was like "okay cool" really nonchalantly on the outside....on the inside I was like YES! FINALLY! YAYYY!! Not really advice except maybe to just back off a bit and ask alot of questions about why she doesn't want to?? I know my oldest dd was embarrassed and ds was scared...
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Old 04-23-2008, 12:40 AM   #3
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Re: DD refusing to bowel train! Advice PLEASE!

My dd did the same thing. She started peeing in the potty when she 2 1/2, but didn't start pooping in the potty til about a month after she turned 3. I don't why, just one day she started doing it and never looked back.
One of my friends had the same problem with her son, but with him it was cause he had that seperation anxiety thing where he didn't the poop to get flushed away. So they told him th poop was his friend and his friend liked going swimming. So everyday when his friend came to visit him, he had to take him to the pool then send him down the waterslide.
I thought that was cute and creative. Maybe if that's part of the problem with your dd the pool/waterslide thing could help.
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Old 04-23-2008, 01:02 AM   #4
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Re: DD refusing to bowel train! Advice PLEASE!

Kearnan did the same thing. He has some other stuff going on. He was 5.5yrs when he potty learned. And for peeing it was an overnight thing. But try as he might he could not get the poop to come out on the toilet. He just couldn't relax enough. So eventually he would be watching a movie or playing on the computer and it would come. Finally I bought him a gameboy and told him he could only play it while sitting on the toilet. Of course that is all he wanted to do, and for a couple of days no one else could use the bathroom. But it worked the first day, within a few minutes he had done it. And we haven't had a problem since, it's been over a year now and he can poop on the potty no problem's now. I forget where I got the idea, can't remember if someone else suggested it to me or if I just thought of it. Have you tried reading her a story while she sits? It is hard for some kids to sit still long enough to go, or to relax enough. A story might help, or a hand held game if you are not totally opposed to them. There are educational versions, like vtech. Or jsut little handheld Dora games.
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Old 04-23-2008, 01:09 AM   #5
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Re: DD refusing to bowel train! Advice PLEASE!

Have you tried a small potty? Or a footstool for her to put her feet on? Also, and I know, this will sound somewhat strange, but have you had physical problems ruled out? We had all sorts of issues with our oldest and finally found out she has a wheat sensitivity. Cut way back on the wheat and problem solved.
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Old 04-23-2008, 09:13 PM   #6
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Re: DD refusing to bowel train! Advice PLEASE!

That's interesting about the wheat. All she eats is 100% unenriched wheat bread. And she's a picky eater so peanut butter sandwiches are the main staple. I'll try cutting back. As for the potties. We have both kinds, a sm one and one for our toliet, and she goes back and forth.
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Old 04-23-2008, 09:14 PM   #7
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Re: DD refusing to bowel train! Advice PLEASE!

I'm going to try this for sure. Great idea! Thanks!
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Old 04-24-2008, 06:06 AM   #8
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Re: DD refusing to bowel train! Advice PLEASE!

I think that this must be a fairly common thing. According to my mother, I had the same issue. One day when company was over I decided to go and came running out with my pants around my ankles singing "I pooped in the potty!" Of course, I don't remember it!
My DS had the same issue. I found him some tiny boxer shorts and explained to him that if he pooped in them the poop would roll down his leg and onto the floor. He did it once. He was outside and wearing jeans so the poop really snuggled up to his legs and he did NOT like it. Ever since then he had no issue pooping on the potty. I did this after not making it an issue for 6 months and waiting for things to just work out. I wasn't vindictive or incriminating. I just stated the facts about what would happen if he pooped in those boxers the same way I might have explained gravity.
I know you're dealing with a girl here, but the boxers thing can be girliefied if necessary.
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Old 04-24-2008, 01:26 PM   #9
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Re: DD refusing to bowel train! Advice PLEASE!

That's a good idea, too. She doesn't like to be messy but I think she'd really HATE the idea of it falling out onto the floor! I'm going to look around for some girly shorts and introduce them "like daddy's" bec he is everything!
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Old 04-24-2008, 08:11 PM   #10
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Re: DD refusing to bowel train! Advice PLEASE!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jessi621 View Post
My dd did the same thing. She started peeing in the potty when she 2 1/2, but didn't start pooping in the potty til about a month after she turned 3. I don't why, just one day she started doing it and never looked back.
One of my friends had the same problem with her son, but with him it was cause he had that seperation anxiety thing where he didn't the poop to get flushed away. So they told him th poop was his friend and his friend liked going swimming. So everyday when his friend came to visit him, he had to take him to the pool then send him down the waterslide.
I thought that was cute and creative. Maybe if that's part of the problem with your dd the pool/waterslide thing could help.
That's THE funniest thing I've heard all day
DD and I have some serious talks about bodily functions, but this takes the cake!

OP--there's a trainer/boxer called Ditto Daddy that you might like if your DD wants to be like Daddy: http://hyenacart.com/onestore.php?vid=454&category=52
Otherwise, there are tons of mamas on Hyena Cart that make girls' boxers and panties.
http://hyenacart.com/hc_search.php?c=1

We're in the same boat, BTW--DD'll pee on the potty like a champ, but poop in her diaper the minute she gets it on. We're using Blueberry trainers (pull up, we call 'panties' but absorbant like a diaper) but DD doesn't seem to know the difference and doesn't seem to care if she poos in them
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