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Old 06-01-2008, 09:22 PM   #1
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Explaining adoption to my other kids...

Does anyone know of any good children's books that explain adoption on a child's level? Or how have you explained it to your children?

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Old 06-01-2008, 09:48 PM   #2
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Re: Explaining adoption to my other kids...

haven't gotten that far yet... we are always going to let our LO's know they were adopted as they ask questions. They said in our training classes that you will know when they're ready because they will ask questions... and when they ask.. answer honestly... and only what they ask.. Don't bombard them with everything at once. Learning about an adoption is a life long process not an overnight one... Good luck to you!
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Old 06-02-2008, 06:47 AM   #3
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Re: Explaining adoption to my other kids...

There is a good book by Jamie Lee Curtis that explains adoption - it's written more for the adopted child but it would give a good idea of what is happening for your other children. Good Luck!
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Old 06-02-2008, 08:03 PM   #4
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Re: Explaining adoption to my other kids...

Here's a great place to find adoption books:
http://www.tapestrybooks.com/categories.asp?cID=270

We have the Jamie Lee Curtis book: "Tell me again about the night I was born" (directed toward the adopted child)
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Old 06-02-2008, 09:12 PM   #5
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Re: Explaining adoption to my other kids...

Barnes & Noble tends to have the better selection of adoption related books in their kids section. Borders is ok with their selection as well. Both will order books for you too if they don't have them.

We have several books, though we haven't read them to Sweet Pea yet. And we had it pretty easy with his cousins - they are 5, 3, 2 and 1 and just totally accepted it when he was born. We'd been telling them all along (as we got the nursery together, car seats, baby stuff, etc) that we were going to have a baby some day, we were just waiting for our baby to be born so we could bring him or her home. I am sure they will eventually have more questions, but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.
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Old 06-03-2008, 07:30 AM   #6
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Re: Explaining adoption to my other kids...

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Originally Posted by BabyMarksMommy View Post
Barnes & Noble tends to have the better selection of adoption related books in their kids section. Borders is ok with their selection as well. Both will order books for you too if they don't have them.

We have several books, though we haven't read them to Sweet Pea yet. And we had it pretty easy with his cousins - they are 5, 3, 2 and 1 and just totally accepted it when he was born. We'd been telling them all along (as we got the nursery together, car seats, baby stuff, etc) that we were going to have a baby some day, we were just waiting for our baby to be born so we could bring him or her home. I am sure they will eventually have more questions, but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.
I'm sure my kids know, my ds is 5 and my dd is almost 3. I was looking through the book of things my ds's teacher sent home and one of his drawings was of his family and he had mommy, daddy, sister, and baby. So I'm pretty sure he has a clue. We have not sat down and talked with them yet. We are meeting with the attorney today so it might be time to have a conversation with them. After today I'll be really busy getting ready.
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Old 06-03-2008, 08:52 AM   #7
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Re: Explaining adoption to my other kids...

My favorites are Little Miss Spider and A Mother for Choco. Even my 12 year old still likes to read Choco.
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Old 06-12-2008, 07:11 PM   #8
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Re: Explaining adoption to my other kids...

We have the book by Stephen Curtis Chapman "Shaoey and Dot". It's really cute. It is specific to China.
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Old 06-12-2008, 08:18 PM   #9
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Re: Explaining adoption to my other kids...

I sometimes think of writing my own book. Most of the books out there are written for the adopted child. And there are books written for adoptions from China. But my kids are biological and not adopted. Still I've read them several of the books, including A Koala for Katie, the really annoying Sesame Street one, and the Jamie Lee Curtis. But in the end I sat down with my 4 year old and we "wrote" a little "book" for him, he drew the pictures, as we talked about adoption. this was in response to his "this adoption thing is taking too long! Why don't you just grow a baby in your own belly!". That comment followed a period of several months where he asked every pregnant woman he saw if we could have her baby. Most of them took it OK.

Anyway, books were a good starting point. We have been talking adoption with our kids for over a year now. Just keeping the dialog open and not getting to detailed seems to be working. They met our social worker and have accompanied me for fingerprinting (they thought that was pretty cool). We talk about the waiting process. It helps that we have a couple of good friends who have adopted and they have been really nice about answering my DS' questions about it. My older DS has decided his baby doll is adopted. He is a very nurturing little boy, and so far his comprehension of the whole thing has been great. DS2 is only 3. He talks the talk but doesn't get it all yet.

We don't tell them about situations that have come up, and won't until we get some clear signal that its a go. We talk about preparing for the baby, and they have helped me shop for newborn diapers (they get really into it) And they fight over who will get to change the baby (I wish!) Yeah, these boys need a baby in the house.

Good luck - kids are pretty savvy, so your 5 year old is probably pretty clued in.
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