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Old 06-24-2008, 04:02 PM   #11
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Re: I am horrified! And annoyed!

sounds like some good suggestions thus far. The only thing I would add is to have him draw a thank you note drawing to mail to them thus enforcing that behavior.

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Old 06-24-2008, 04:18 PM   #12
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Re: I am horrified! And annoyed!

He probably didn't mean for it be hurtful, 4 year olds are just learning what is and isn't socially acceptable. At 2, and into 3, it's 'cute' when a kids does something that is normally socially unacceptable because everybody knows they don't know. Then suddenly they turn 4 and it's no longer cute. So they learn, mostly through trial and error, more tactful ways of saying things.

I would just talk to him and let him know that what he said was hurtful and how to act next time. Such as telling him he can fake it that he likes it, and perhaps return it for something else.
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Old 06-24-2008, 04:27 PM   #13
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Re: I am horrified! And annoyed!

I like what clothmamaof4 said. It begs the question, "what is a gift"? I mean, for example, if you are adamant about nursing, you make that clear, etc. and a "friend" "gifts" you 10 cans of formula, a box of bottles, and allergy medicine to help your milk dry up... is that a gift? It was expensive! When someone gives you a present that THEY want you to have, that doesn't make it a gift, IMO. Like my grandma, who gave my smoking cousin a "how to quit smoking" self-help book. Now I can't stand smoking either, but c'mon, that's not a gift!

Anyway, unless your DS specified what books he wanted, how were the grandparents supposed to know? That's what you have to explain to him, I think. That they had nice thoughts in giving him those books, even if they got the "wrong" ones. I think it's nice that the grandparents are sending new books. It will be an opportunity to explain these lessons to him whenever he reads those books.
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