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Old 11-24-2006, 05:58 PM   #51
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Re: My 4 yo tried to kill the baby!!! UPDATE

I just wanted to say *hugs* to you this must be heart wrenching to go through. No judgement coming from me mama just want to send you lots of good wishes!


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Old 11-25-2006, 07:25 PM   #52
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Re: My 4 yo tried to kill the baby!!! UPDATE

Wow, how scary and sad to have to deal with this. I hope the Dr. is able to offer you and your son some good help. I wonder if he is just needing some more attention right now, maybe some quality one on one time with mom or dad would help some? I love the pp idea of using a crib tent. That would atleast offer you a little bit of extra protection. Keeping in mind that a 4 year old would be able to unzip the tent though, so maybe not? I also wonder if the situation can be handled without making the 4 year old feel like you can't trust him now.
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Old 11-25-2006, 08:26 PM   #53
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Re: My 4 yo tried to kill the baby!!!

Originally Posted by TwinKristi View Post

Second, I'm pretty sure he wasn't trying to KILL the baby. A 4yo doesn't really have the mind set to purposely KILL someone. They don't understand permanance and what doing that could do. They don't realize that if you give a baby a marble to play with that they could choke and die, forever. Die to them means they fall on the ground and get back up later. The only death my kids have seen is on TV, obviously fake so they don't really KNOW that you never come back, EVER. We try to talk about that kinda stuff but mainly with the 9yos since they can actually grasp the concept. Even teenagers don't really get the consequences for their actions, like shooting ppl at school just to get rid of a problem. kwim??
My four year old has a very clear understanding of death. She knows that when you die you are all gone and can never play, breath, eat, talk again and that your family can never see you and that your body gets burried in the ground. I think that many four year olds can comrehend the finality of death.

To the OP, I am so sorry. I wish I could help in some way
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Old 11-28-2006, 03:48 PM   #54
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Re: My 4 yo tried to kill the baby!!!

Originally Posted by mommabug42006 View Post
well I called the ped they are giving me a referral to the Ruth Cooper Center for psych help. In the mean time they told me to watch the baby very closely and NEVER allow them alone for even a minute. They upped the dose of his adderall hoping it is an impulse problem and his clodine as well. He has never been an aggressive child really infact he is usually the whipping boy for his older sibs. They blame everything on him and try to get him in trouble, so maybe he is just lashing out at someone smaller then him. I don't know. Geeze what I wouldn't give for semi-normal kids!!!!
Just wondering...
Is your 4 yr old on meds? Is he ADHD?
I'm asking because my son is mildly autistic. His agression was never great, but it increased a lot at age 4. He tried to choke my then 2 yo ds, the dog, ME... I had bruises up and down my arms from him attacking me and biting me. He kicked me (already in the face and the throat). He pinned my other ds and bit his cheek. It was purple for a week. (I'm shocked no one asked if I was abusing him.) The developmental specialist ended up putting him on anti-anxiety meds (Buspar) but they made him WORSE! Then we tried Risperdal. We had to up the dose and then miracles of miracles he improved! Now that he is going through a growth spurt he is worse again, so we have to increase his dose until he's done growing. It makes me cry to think of it, but Risperdal is an anti-psychotic. But the way it has helped my son is terrific. He is still himself, but he is now able to control himself. He can love and be nice to both his little brothers. We still have some fights, but NOTHING like we did before. I hate medicating kids, but when it helps prevent my 5 yr old from killing someone, so be it. I also make picture stories for him to describe what is and is not acceptable. I use a computer program from There is hope. I am glad you're being an informed mom and seeking help rather than wishing you had after it's too late. You're doing the right thing.
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Old 11-28-2006, 04:02 PM   #55
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Re: My 4 yo tried to kill the baby!!! UPDATE

I just found this thread and I just wanted to say I'm so sorry this happened. It must have been so scary and heartbreaking. Your post made me so sad for your little guy. I would never judge a parent for the decisions they make for their children. Our hearts are all in the same place. I hope you and your family get the help he needs so he can get back to his regularly scheduled happy little childhood.
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