View Poll Results: Is it okay to bathe non-related young children together?
It's okay. 151 45.76%
It's okay up to a certain age (please elaborate.) 146 44.24%
It's never okay. 11 3.33%
It's okay for MY situation-- but you'd never do it. 0 0%
OTHER (please elaborate.) 22 6.67%
Voters: 330. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 02-13-2009, 12:31 PM   #71
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Re: Bathing young girls together??? Okay or not?

I would say ask the mom/parents what they are comfortable with and then as the girls if they are comfortable. I honestly bathed/showered with one of my girlfriends even at age 12-13. Never anything sexual or akward, we were just comfortable.

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Old 02-13-2009, 12:40 PM   #72
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Re: Bathing young girls together??? Okay or not?

It makes me wonder about the parents of the child. They gave you the wrong number, and left their child to stay over night with someone they don't know that well? I think it's a little odd, especially for a child as young as 5 to be abandoned like that, and from what I read above, it looks like there isn't the type of care going on in her home as in your home. Are the parents young? I would just be concerned for her home life. How did your DD become friends with someone who seems to be from a totally different background?
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Old 02-13-2009, 12:56 PM   #73
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Re: Bathing young girls together??? Okay or not?

At 5yo I don't think I would. I'd definitely get parental approval and/ or use a swimsuit. I wouldn't want someone to give my DD a bath (though she'd never spend the night at a friend's when she's only 5).
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Old 02-13-2009, 12:57 PM   #74
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Re: Bathing young girls together??? Okay or not?

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Originally Posted by spotsmum13 View Post
It makes me wonder about the parents of the child. They gave you the wrong number, and left their child to stay over night with someone they don't know that well? I think it's a little odd, especially for a child as young as 5 to be abandoned like that, and from what I read above, it looks like there isn't the type of care going on in her home as in your home. Are the parents young? I would just be concerned for her home life. How did your DD become friends with someone who seems to be from a totally different background?
wondering the exact same thing...
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Old 02-13-2009, 12:59 PM   #75
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Re: Bathing young girls together??? Okay or not?

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i think its ok. you could always have them wear their swim suits in the tub if youre uncomfy about it
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Old 02-13-2009, 02:14 PM   #76
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Re: Bathing young girls together??? Okay or not?

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I think once the girls are of the age where curiosity sets in...it's probably best not to bathe them together if they're not related.
I don't get how related like being cousins makes a difference I guess. My kiddos cousins (all 2 of them) are great but some of my kiddos growing up were definitely not people I would let my kids bathe with. For me it would go kid by kid. I would be more hesitant if I thought that the other child might have a weird home as children often do what has been shown them. Also if curiousity is a concern that sets in real soon. I've seen little girls about a year old grab there brothers winky to see what it was (kiddos I babysat) so when I had mine I left it to behavior I saw going on and there personal comfort levels.
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Old 02-13-2009, 03:35 PM   #77
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Re: Bathing young girls together??? Okay or not?

I was nursing the baby when the dad came by this morning. DH talked to him and the guy asked asked if she could stay until later that evening because he had to work. DH didn't mention the bathing issue, but he did get the correct contact number from him (there was one number off.)

Later on the mom called... They have a cell phone and it kept cutting out. She called back a few minutes later and was all: "Is M*** there and can I speak with her please!" She was all short with me (And why wouldn't her daughter be here?) I told DH that I really don't want to deal with that craziness anymore.

She came to get Mary shortly after that. She was behaving weirdly and left quickly. I didn't even bother talking to her about the bath. I just wanted her out of my house. They all give me the heebie-jeebies.
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Old 02-13-2009, 03:47 PM   #78
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Re: Bathing young girls together??? Okay or not?

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Originally Posted by spotsmum13 View Post
It makes me wonder about the parents of the child. They gave you the wrong number, and left their child to stay over night with someone they don't know that well? I think it's a little odd, especially for a child as young as 5 to be abandoned like that, and from what I read above, it looks like there isn't the type of care going on in her home as in your home. Are the parents young? I would just be concerned for her home life. How did your DD become friends with someone who seems to be from a totally different background?

The parents aren't young at all. (I'm fairly young, though @ 24 ) They are a bit... unsavory looking. The dad rolled a tobacco cigarette when we were there picking DD up from her one (hour long) visit. He made sure to tell us that he often rolls his own, so if my DD said anything about him "rolling something" up, not to worry because it was just tobacco

It's crazy that they became friends because (although they do go to the same school) DD and the little girl don't have the same teacher and don't even take breaks at the same time.

BUT, they ride the bus home from school together. Unfortunately, my DD gets off the bus first and the other little girl showed her mommy and daddy where we live... and they just popped in one day. I'd feel bad about telling the little girl she wasn't welcome in my house... plus my DD doesn't have a lot of friends outside of school that she can play with (and this one lives especially close.)

The girl is sweet... but she has a rather devious side to her. I've caught her trying to take some of DD's stuff home with her before (not things that my DD has given her-- which she often does) she was very sneaky about it and it appeared that she was pretty experienced with that sort of thing I also catch her whispering with DD and encouraging her to disobey me. I hold Ambrosia responsible because SHE knows better... but it does upset me that the little girl seems to thrive on my DD getting in trouble while she's visiting (I never get her in trouble because she's not my child and I don't want to scare her.)

Honestly, after the weird vibes I got from her mom, and the general uneasy feeling I get from the whole family-- I don't think I'll be allowing them to hang out again. The problem is that her parents tend to just POP in with her and I'm *always* at home... I'd feel like such a jerk if I turned her away at the door, especially since Ambrosia loves having her over to play

IDK what to do. DH looks at this as one more reason to home school her next year. *sigh*
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Old 02-15-2009, 11:58 AM   #79
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Re: Bathing young girls together??? Okay or not?

It's okay up to a certain age once they get like 8 they kinda figure it all out
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Old 02-15-2009, 12:44 PM   #80
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Re: Bathing young girls together??? Okay or not?

I think it's fine if they both want to. My actual concern is that I wouldn't want my generally clean child to bathe in the same water as a generally dirty child. Our friends don't have the same view at all on hygiene as we do, their son does have eczema as well which plays a part, but he's ALWAYS dirty. Nothing dangerous, just yucky. So when he comes over I give him a bath, drain the water, then let both boys play together after that.
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