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Old 01-23-2007, 02:54 PM   #91
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Re: have a question no debate please just yes or no

Interesting that I see this post, just after hearing an NPR report yesterday that Washington state is now trying to pass a law to ban spanking, too. I am not a spanker, nor is my husband. We don't believe in it even though we were spanked and we are 32 and 36, respectively. However, I felt like some of the above, that it is just too invasive for the gov to interfere in such matters. But, once I heard the thought process behind the law, I have to say, it gave me pause.

They want to pass such laws, because otherwise, there is no reliable way to put child abusers away. Violence against children needs to be defined and outlawed to prosecute abusers effectively, otherwise it's up for interpretation whether alleged abuse is be considered "unwarrented violence." And as they pointed out, the spanking debate is a hotly debated issue that is really very analagous to the domestic violence laws that started being passed about 20 years ago (at least in WA state). Back then, people felt that domestic violence was a private matter and that the gov should butt out. I gotta say, as an adult who had a childhood riddled with both physical child abuse and domestic violence, I definately see the corrolation. And boy, am I glad we have laws protecting women from violence - I'd like to see children also protected against violence and or abuse.

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Old 01-23-2007, 09:41 PM   #92
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Re: have a question no debate please just yes or no

We do not spank. I grew up being abused. I chose to break the cycle.
Our girls are 11 yrs,9 yrs and 17 mths.
oh and the purposed ban would be for children 3 and under.
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Old 01-23-2007, 09:50 PM   #93
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Re: have a question no debate please just yes or no

No and no. I was "spanked/disciplined" in the "name of love" and my father abused us this way. He says he did it because he loved us, and I have the physical and emotional scars to prove it. We do not spank in our house- the idea of hurting my child intentionally disturbs me.
I do not think there should be a no spanking law though- the gov't has enough power as it is.
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Old 01-23-2007, 09:52 PM   #94
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Re: have a question no debate please just yes or no

NEVER EVER WILL I SPANK MY CHILDREN!!!
I respect them too much.
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Old 01-23-2007, 10:16 PM   #95
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Re: have a question no debate please just yes or no

Spanking is not for us. I believe in teaching children by example.

That law will be near impossible to enforce but there are lots of laws like that so....
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Old 01-24-2007, 04:45 AM   #96
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Re: have a question no debate please just yes or no

Personally I don't understand the proposed law. I would be surprised if those who choose not to spank would think it's a crime to smack a child's hand if they are reaching for a hot stove (please correct me if I am making a wrong assumption). The thing that seems to be overlooked in all of this is that child abuse is already illegal. If a child is being abused, the law will get involved and there will be major repercussions. As someone who has worked with troubled families for years, I have seen how parental incarceration or removal from the parents' home is very traumatic for a young child. If a parent isn't being abusive, it's the child who suffers if the law gets involved.
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Old 01-24-2007, 07:25 AM   #97
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Re: have a question no debate please just yes or no

NO and NO here too.
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Old 01-24-2007, 08:19 AM   #98
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Re: have a question no debate please just yes or no

I am not sure how they plan to enforce it?

I don't think I will spank my kids. I think it is wrong to hit them. I have mom friends who swat their kids. I don't know, they seem to get swatted for silly things. And the swats never sting or physically hurt, but they are pretty upsetting!

I was spanked as a kid. Not often, probably because I figured out how far to push them before the wooden spoon or hair brush came out.

My DH thinks we should spank. But I disagree. He is a yeller too and I am trying to work on that issue too. Ironically, my husband wasn't spanked as a child. His dad was beaten as a kid and told me he could never hit his own kids (for fear of taking it too far). Why DH wants to spank when he grew up fine without it is just weird.
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Old 01-24-2007, 08:24 AM   #99
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Re: have a question no debate please just yes or no

Quote:
Originally Posted by karmamama View Post
exactly

Seems like the assult laws are enforced when it's two children involved, but not when it's an adult and child
Yes, we will when it's called for and amen to this.
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Old 01-24-2007, 08:26 AM   #100
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Re: have a question no debate please just yes or no

I am not going to spank...that is one area I differ with my own mom. We were spanked and I don't think it helps in many situations.Your kids will see that you hit them and then think its okay. My sister and I are both physical people sometimes. My sister literally beats up her fiance. I am not saying this happens to everyone but it did with us. My grandfather abused my mom and her brothers. I have a fear of "taking it to far" because so many peopple in my family have a history of physical abuse. I know I would never do that but it makes me scared that maybe it is in my blood or something. Also, a swat on the butt SOMETIMES is okay in my opinion...just not everyday or even weekly, kwim? I don't like yelling either.
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