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Old 04-10-2009, 12:33 PM   #21
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Re: How do you get a 4 year old to understand danger and death

My 4 year old does things like this too.. sadly, mine is only 3 months old. when I find her she tells me she hates the baby, or whatever and runs to her room.

It's stressful. I've put her in time out for it and make sure baby isn't left alone with her for long.

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Old 04-10-2009, 10:26 PM   #22
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Re: How do you get a 4 year old to understand danger and death

I have a 4 year old and a 19 month old. My 4 year old has never done anything so serious, but is constantly making life difficult for the 19 month old. He just likes to control him and tell him what he can and can not do. DS1 thinks DS2 is his personal playmate that will do whatever he wants. He never really hurts him other than dragging him across the floor every once in a while because he wants him in "this" spot instead of "that" spot. I would deffinately spank if I caught him deliberately hurting him. We use spanking every so often when he gets way out of hand and MAJORLY disrepectful. Usually, a naughty spot and a timer do the trick. I am very careful about watching the 2 of them interact. When I have to cook or something and not be on top of them, I usually put DS2 in the living room for the time being. There is a baby gate up and he can't get out. DS1 can get him, but knows that if I catch him being mean to his brother once, he is out of there. But like I said, he's mean as in won't let brother play with this or that toy and not mean as in deliberately hurting him. That's crossing the line and warrants very strict punishment. First comes spanking, then naughty spot until lil one calms down. Once everything is calm, a good talking to about why it's not acceptable behaviour.
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Old 04-11-2009, 05:56 PM   #23
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Re: How do you get a 4 year old to understand danger and death

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Originally Posted by juliasmom92905 View Post
I am not a big spanker at all but IMO it warrents a swat on the bottom since its not the first time its happend and she is finding it funny.
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Old 04-11-2009, 07:45 PM   #24
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Re: How do you get a 4 year old to understand danger and death

I have to agree with the pps on the spanking, unfortantely. I really hate to recommend something so drastic (trust me, I really truly am NOT for spanking habitually), but like they said, this problem is very serious in that it's life or death and it needs to stop NOW. I doubt it would take more than once, maybe twice if she's a terribly strong-willed child before she stops altogether. It's just not something I would chance..it seems you've talked to her already and tried the typical solutions to no avail so it's time to go to the drastic measures. JMO.
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Old 04-11-2009, 09:43 PM   #25
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Re: How do you get a 4 year old to understand danger and death

For us spanking is only for life and death situations, this is one of those situations. I would have a talk with her and explain if she does it again she will be getting a spanking.
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Old 04-11-2009, 09:59 PM   #26
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Re: How do you get a 4 year old to understand danger and death

oh wow, how scary for you mom!!! I'm kinda on the fence about the spanking ASA I found older DD holding the pillow over younger DD face, that is life-threatening & I don't think I would hesitate to express myself at how upset I would be on walking in on this. I'm not a spanker, but I can totally see how this situation would warrant one. Plus a good time-out, then talking about the danger of that sort of 'play' with younger DD.

I remember watching an episode of Supernanny (or Nanny911??) where an older sibling was *playing* with younger sibling by holding a big couch cushion over the head of the younger one - the cameraman actually had to step in and intervene as the younger sibling almost passed out. I couldn't believe it when I was watching the show, I actually jumped up off the couch and was yelling, OMG...why isn't anyone doing anything?!@?!?
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Old 04-12-2009, 07:51 AM   #27
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Re: How do you get a 4 year old to understand danger and death

I would also spank. She totally knows what she is doing and has continued to defy you once you have told her no countless times. I may be old-school, but a good spanking will make her think twice before hurting her sister.
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Old 04-12-2009, 08:17 AM   #28
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Re: How do you get a 4 year old to understand danger and death

I'd spank her as well. My 4yr old dd has only been spanked twice and both times she was so shocked. Seriously, under different circumstances the look on her face would be hilarious. Both times the behavior stopped immediately.

Suffocation is nothing to fool around with. She's not going to be scarred for life because of one spanking.
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