How hard is moving on kids?

[Ellowyn]

My Dh just found out he needs a new job...so we may have to move. My older kids are both in middle school. I wouldn't say they have tons of friends or anything. They each have a couple of close friends they hang out with. We've been here about 3 years, so it's not where they've been all their life. I just feel so bad about turning their worlds upside down. They are used to it here now and it's just so unexpected. On top of that, I'm about 3 months pregnant and the kids don't know yet. Whoa, a lot of changes to throw at them during their prepubescent (hormonal) years. Anyone have any experiences with moving kids at this age?

[nikkiemom2emmy]

Well I was a kid that was moved sooooo many times as a kid. (my dad was in the service) It was a little harder by middle school because the older I got the harder it was to make friends since they were already in formed "clicks". Try to make it fun and involved for them. Let them go house hunting and choosing their rooms. That kind of stuff I really liked. If they are into activities find out where/when etc those are in that area. GL!!

[Psychomom]

Get them involved in activities ASAP. We moved around a lot (Army) and that was one thing my parents always said they'd do, but never did. Obviously, moving got tougher the older I got, but you gotta do what you gotta do!

[WhatWasIThinking]

It is VERY hard at those ages. When they are little not so much but middle school, yeah, pretty tough.

[valentinfaye]

How far are they moving? It's the close friends that are the crux of the issue.

Then again, escaping to a fresh start can be ideally timed right about then.

[Ellowyn]

Well, if we have to move, we'll be going back to the town we originally moved here from. It's a long way away. Like a plane flight away. But, they will be familiar with the city we are going back to and will know some of the same people from when we lived there before. It's actually more what they are used to culturally. No one will make fun of their accents back there because it's where we all grew up. As worried as I am about my kids, I have really, really been wanting to go back for some time now.

[WhatWasIThinking]

Since you are back to your hometown thats ALOT different than moving to a new city!

[LilyGrace]

Originally Posted by boomer Get them involved in activities ASAP. We moved around a lot (Army) and that was one thing my parents always said they'd do, but never did. Obviously, moving got tougher the older I got, but you gotta do what you gotta do!

I agree! Get them involved in activities, get them involved in the move...it's not easy for kids to move but I do think it's easier now than it's ever been. Kids around here use sites like Club Penguin to stay in touch as they transition, there's email, phone...

I think you set the tone. If you look at moving at this frustrating thing, the kids will pick up on that and multiply those feelings by a hundred. If you look at it as an adventure, an exciting new thing, the kids will still grumble at this age, but it'll be easier for them to be an active part of the move and look forward to the new things.

We move again in the spring, and one thing we're planning on doing is redoing The Kid's bedroom as we move (he's 10). So, not only does he get to look forward to a new place (something he can't control), but he also gets to look forward to a new bedroom (something he can control).