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Old 06-21-2009, 07:10 PM   #281
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Re: Top ten reasons not to circumcise your son

I'm having this horrid debate w/dh right now. I don't want my son circ'd and dh def. knows how strongly I feel. Unfortunately, I can't get him to outright agree with me on leaving the baby intact. I'm trying to not put to much "pressure" on him and trying to give him factual info, but he is just being stubborn AND to make me even madder REFUSES to watch the video. I did flat out tell him that I won't even consider having him circ'd if he doesn't atleast watch the video. He just seems to think it is ok for the baby to have a piece of his body cut off and for him to not even know what happens or think about it. Why is he being so bullheaded!!!!

I told him I want to be fully decided BEFORE we got to the hospital, but I'm due in 3 1/2 weeks and don't really know where to go with him. His only "hang ups" is the locker room thing and what his future girlfriends will think. I told him over and over about the rate of intact boys increasing.......but he still thinks it will be an "issue."

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Old 06-21-2009, 07:22 PM   #282
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Re: Top ten reasons not to circumcise your son

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I told him I want to be fully decided BEFORE we got to the hospital, but I'm due in 3 1/2 weeks and don't really know where to go with him. His only "hang ups" is the locker room thing and what his future girlfriends will think. I told him over and over about the rate of intact boys increasing.......but he still thinks it will be an "issue."
As my hubby says...guys do NOT look at each other in the locker room b/c they don't want to appear homosexual.

As for the girlfriends...they will THANK YOU and so will HE b/c from what I understand it is *much* more enjoyable when you have your full penis the way God made you.
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Old 06-21-2009, 07:41 PM   #283
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Re: Top ten reasons not to circumcise your son

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I'm having this horrid debate w/dh right now. I don't want my son circ'd and dh def. knows how strongly I feel. Unfortunately, I can't get him to outright agree with me on leaving the baby intact. I'm trying to not put to much "pressure" on him and trying to give him factual info, but he is just being stubborn AND to make me even madder REFUSES to watch the video. I did flat out tell him that I won't even consider having him circ'd if he doesn't atleast watch the video. He just seems to think it is ok for the baby to have a piece of his body cut off and for him to not even know what happens or think about it. Why is he being so bullheaded!!!!

I told him I want to be fully decided BEFORE we got to the hospital, but I'm due in 3 1/2 weeks and don't really know where to go with him. His only "hang ups" is the locker room thing and what his future girlfriends will think. I told him over and over about the rate of intact boys increasing.......but he still thinks it will be an "issue."

My husband was the same way. He never watched a video, or read information about it. The day we found out we were having another boy, I cried and cried. I didn't want to even have to TALK about with him or his close-minded family. But our baby was a boy, so the talk had to happen. Weeks and months went by, and we never talked about it. As the due date got closer, I'd ask him, and he'd say he didn't know and then the conversation was dropped. So I made the decision on my own. When DS2 was born, I just told them no circ. His family continued to ask me for the first weeks of his life. "Are you sure you're not gonna do it? It's not too late ya know." I told them over and over it wasn't going to happen. And while DH never really defended me, he never pressured either. He knew I had done my research and he trusted me. Some of our family made ugly comments, but I was standing my ground.
One time when I was changing his diaper, my SIL says "we can't called it a peanut, cause it doesn't look like one" to which I said "sure it does. It's just an unshelled peanut." Her response was "it looks like an anteater." Pssh, oh well. She went on to have a boy a few months after DS2 was born. She got him circed, and she REFUSED to watch a video because "they just found the worst videos to post; not all circs are like that." His birth was "traumatic" already, so might as well do all the painful stuff while he's still adjusting to the world. Yeah, cause what a wonderful welcoming.
I've also noticed that his shaft is attached to his fat pad funny. The top of his penis is longer than the bottom because of the bottom is attached to the fat pad kinda high. The doc said it's competely fine, and nothing to be concerned about. The more I've been reading, the more I think they took too much skin off. My poor sweet nephew. Her husband went as far as to tell me that him and his friends used to make fun of their intact friends. That made me want to throw up. I just told him that hopefully his friends will be more mature than he was. Grow up would ya? It's not gonna change my mind just because he was an #*$&% as an adolescent.
And FYI, DS1 is circed, and has never noticed a difference between him and his brother. Granted he's only a toddler (almost 3), but he knows what his looks like and what his brothers looks like. He points and says "Porter's penis" and that's it. We'll see if he EVER notices a difference.
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Old 06-21-2009, 08:06 PM   #284
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Re: Top ten reasons not to circumcise your son

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I truly hope that it wasn't painful for your sons during the procedure. I'm just speaking as the wife of a DH with a botched circ to let you know that sometimes sex is painful for me because of my husband's circ. You may think he's not hurting now, but his future wife may have to hurt all their married life. I don't think you have the right to do that to her.
I am sorry you are not able to fully enjoy that part of your married life as well as you would like to.... Truly i am, but....

As the mother of these children i DO have to right to make any medical decision i feel is the best for my children. Whether people agree with it or not is fine, but as their mother, that is my job - to educate myself and then choose accordingly. This to me runs along the same lines as vaxing, regular doctors visits, tubes in the ears, etc.... it's all medical procedures that i either consent to in their behalf or not.

But like i said above, i am sorry you have had a bad experience. My sister is a NICU nurse and the horror stories about what can go wrong in a pregnancy or by choosing to be induced with cytotec, have an epidural, etc could fill volumes of books - there are ALWAYS botched/failed procedures no matter which medical decision you are deciding upon. I feel i am making the best choice for my children, and as their mother that is my choice to make. I cannot base my decisions out of fear of what "might" go wrong....

Then again that is just my
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Old 06-22-2009, 07:14 AM   #285
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Re: Top ten reasons not to circumcise your son

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I am sorry you are not able to fully enjoy that part of your married life as well as you would like to.... Truly i am, but....

As the mother of these children i DO have to right to make any medical decision i feel is the best for my children. Whether people agree with it or not is fine, but as their mother, that is my job - to educate myself and then choose accordingly. This to me runs along the same lines as vaxing, regular doctors visits, tubes in the ears, etc.... it's all medical procedures that i either consent to in their behalf or not.

But like i said above, i am sorry you have had a bad experience. My sister is a NICU nurse and the horror stories about what can go wrong in a pregnancy or by choosing to be induced with cytotec, have an epidural, etc could fill volumes of books - there are ALWAYS botched/failed procedures no matter which medical decision you are deciding upon. I feel i am making the best choice for my children, and as their mother that is my choice to make. I cannot base my decisions out of fear of what "might" go wrong....

Then again that is just my
Mama don't ever let anybody make you feel bad about any decision you have ever made for your child. That is your decision, not thiers to make!!!!
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Old 06-22-2009, 10:47 AM   #286
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Re: Top ten reasons not to circumcise your son

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Mama don't ever let anybody make you feel bad about any decision you have ever made for your child.
If me sharing my personal experience makes someone feel bad about their decision, that's not really my fault. To me that would point to something being wrong with the decision.

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As the mother of these children i DO have to right to make any medical decision i feel is the best for my children.
I couldn't agree more. Can I ask what information you found in your research that tipped the scales toward circumcising rather than not?
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Old 06-22-2009, 10:48 AM   #287
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Re: Top ten reasons not to circumcise your son

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As my hubby says...guys do NOT look at each other in the locker room b/c they don't want to appear homosexual.

As for the girlfriends...they will THANK YOU and so will HE b/c from what I understand it is *much* more enjoyable when you have your full penis the way God made you.
I know, the whole locker room thing is just hogwash to me. And, if his intact penis affects the way a future girlfriend feels for him, then obviously he needs to find someone else anyhow.

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Originally Posted by DommysMommy View Post
My husband was the same way. He never watched a video, or read information about it. The day we found out we were having another boy, I cried and cried. I didn't want to even have to TALK about with him or his close-minded family. But our baby was a boy, so the talk had to happen. Weeks and months went by, and we never talked about it. As the due date got closer, I'd ask him, and he'd say he didn't know and then the conversation was dropped. So I made the decision on my own. When DS2 was born, I just told them no circ. His family continued to ask me for the first weeks of his life. "Are you sure you're not gonna do it? It's not too late ya know." I told them over and over it wasn't going to happen. And while DH never really defended me, he never pressured either. He knew I had done my research and he trusted me. Some of our family made ugly comments, but I was standing my ground.
One time when I was changing his diaper, my SIL says "we can't called it a peanut, cause it doesn't look like one" to which I said "sure it does. It's just an unshelled peanut." Her response was "it looks like an anteater." Pssh, oh well. She went on to have a boy a few months after DS2 was born. She got him circed, and she REFUSED to watch a video because "they just found the worst videos to post; not all circs are like that." His birth was "traumatic" already, so might as well do all the painful stuff while he's still adjusting to the world. Yeah, cause what a wonderful welcoming.
I've also noticed that his shaft is attached to his fat pad funny. The top of his penis is longer than the bottom because of the bottom is attached to the fat pad kinda high. The doc said it's competely fine, and nothing to be concerned about. The more I've been reading, the more I think they took too much skin off. My poor sweet nephew. Her husband went as far as to tell me that him and his friends used to make fun of their intact friends. That made me want to throw up. I just told him that hopefully his friends will be more mature than he was. Grow up would ya? It's not gonna change my mind just because he was an #*$&% as an adolescent.
And FYI, DS1 is circed, and has never noticed a difference between him and his brother. Granted he's only a toddler (almost 3), but he knows what his looks like and what his brothers looks like. He points and says "Porter's penis" and that's it. We'll see if he EVER notices a difference.
Thanks for your input! I'm actual thankful that my nephew is intact (dh's brother's son) and I'm pretty sure that my brother in law is, but not certain.. So, atleast I have that in my "corner."
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Old 06-23-2009, 01:05 PM   #288
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Re: Top ten reasons not to circumcise your son

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As the mother of these children i DO have to right to make any medical decision i feel is the best for my children. Whether people agree with it or not is fine, but as their mother, that is my job - to educate myself and then choose accordingly. This to me runs along the same lines as vaxing, regular doctors visits, tubes in the ears, etc.... it's all medical procedures that i either consent to in their behalf or not.
Except that there is nothing emergent about having a baby circumcised. With vaccines, the diseases at issue occur during childhood, so that decision has to be made right away. Same with recurrent ear infections and well-baby visits. Circumcision is not an emergency procedure. It is optional. Since it is optional, and since the baby is the one who will have to use the penis for urination and sex for the next 80 years, he should be the one to decide whether he wants to be circumcised or not. His parents need not take any part in this non-decision except to leave him the option, since it is his body.
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Old 06-24-2009, 12:33 PM   #289
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Re: Top ten reasons not to circumcise your son

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My husband was the same way. He never watched a video, or read information about it. The day we found out we were having another boy, I cried and cried. I didn't want to even have to TALK about with him or his close-minded family. But our baby was a boy, so the talk had to happen. Weeks and months went by, and we never talked about it. As the due date got closer, I'd ask him, and he'd say he didn't know and then the conversation was dropped. So I made the decision on my own. When DS2 was born, I just told them no circ.

I tried to bring it up to my DH last night (after reviewing my U/S DVD and thinking what I thought were boy parts) but he didn't want to talk about it. We honestly have never talked about it ever so I'm hoping he'll just let me do what's best...because I'm sure he won't want to watch the video either.
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Old 07-05-2009, 08:43 PM   #290
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Re: Top ten reasons not to circumcise your son

I just wanted to update that while dh and I were out at dinner together tonight he has agreed to not circ our son!!!!! He still would prefer to have it done, but know that I feel MUCH stronger about not having it done than he does and wants to do what I believe in!!!!
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