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Old 09-07-2006, 09:52 PM   #1
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BIG daycare issue- WWYD?

Bella goes to daycare for a few hours everyday. I only leave her a bottle 2 days a week (BM) when I'm gone the longest. She's never taken more than 2 oz from it ever.
Anyway, today Bella was so cranky/hysterical and my DCP thought she was starving- after trying to give her juice and puffs (which I also don't approve of) calls me. I didn't answer, but was already on my way. I was over an hour earlier than usual.
Anyway, I get there, and my DCP casually says oh I was just about to mix her a bottle of formula since she seemed so upset. Now I've told her before about the fact that Bell does not get formula, I don't approve of puffs...etc.
So WWYD? If Bell would've actually gotten formula I probably would've freaked out.
Instead I just said good thing I came, I would've been very upset. And left, before I screamed at her. So...where do I go from here? Do I get someone new? Overall she seems very sweet and I can tell Bell likes her but FORMULA?
I am just at a loss and I've never had daycare before so I can't decide if I'm overreacting or am right to think perhaps I need to go elsewhere?
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Old 09-07-2006, 10:20 PM   #2
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Re: BIG daycare issue- WWYD?

I'd be upset too!! Is there anyway you can pump extra and store it in her freezer for those "just-in-case" times? That way, if she thinks she is starving, she can at least give her BM?

I don't know! I've never had a baby in daycare, so I'm not much help at all! If you otherwise feel comfortable with her, I'd just make sure that she fully understands how you feel about the situation and give her another chance.
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Old 09-07-2006, 10:51 PM   #3
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Re: BIG daycare issue- WWYD?

as a child care provider myself we really dont mean to mess with your kids it jsut we want them to be happy now I would never give a breast fed child formula without talking to mom first, I would not take the poofs to hard, she sounds like she was trying, just my opinion and I would give her a small stock of your milk to make you feel better

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Old 09-07-2006, 11:33 PM   #4
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Re: BIG daycare issue- WWYD?

Put yourself in her position. She has a cranky and fussy baby and what if you came in and got mad that she was so fussy. I would pump some extra breast milk and leave it up there in the freezer. That way if it happens again she will have breast milk to give her. Finding adequate daycare is hard enough, I would try and stick with this person for a while.
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Old 09-07-2006, 11:41 PM   #5
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Re: BIG daycare issue- WWYD?

I agree I think the DCP was only trying to figure out what to do to make you DD happy. If she didn't have BM then her only other option was formula since the juice and stuff wasn't working. If you don't provide enough BM and DD seems extra hungry one day what is she supposed to do. I definately agree w/ other post that you need to leave a back up supply for the DCP, if you don't want your child to get any formula. Wouldn't you feel worse if you DD was hungry because she didn't have any BM and you refused to let DCP give formula.

I also want to add that when my first was in daycare I had to provide an emergancy can of formula for the DCP incase there was some emergancy that required DD to stay w/ provider longer, IE we live in Cali so it was for a earthquake prep kit. Even though I provided BM everyday, they need that as a backup incase there was an earthquake that prevented me from getting back to DD right away.

Last edited by Julesmom23girls; 09-07-2006 at 11:45 PM.
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Old 09-07-2006, 11:46 PM   #6
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Re: BIG daycare issue- WWYD?

I'd stock her up on some extra milk some days baby just wants to eat to feel comfortable hasn't she evr just bf'd all day? As far as the poofs I'm guessing you mean cheese poofs I'd just tell her I do not want MY baby given poofs and if you do it again I will have to find someone else. They normally realize how serious you are at that point, do try however to put it gently that way she doesn't freak either

Good luck Mama
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Old 09-07-2006, 11:47 PM   #7
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Re: BIG daycare issue- WWYD?

I would honestly give this mama another chance. You mentioned that she tried juice and poofs (did she also try the BM?) so she was trying everything she thought might be a problem and offering solutions. If I was the DCP, I would also be upset if I've been trying to calm the baby down and had tried to call the mother and she didn't answer the phone, then got upset with me when she walked in because her baby was fussy and I had been trying everything I could think of to console her. It's kinda like being caught with your hand in the cookie jar but instead of taking them, you're putting them in, but your mother yells at you anyway. (Not too great of an analogy, so I'm sorry )

The pp's have some good advice too with giving the DCP some BM to store too. And just talk it out, I'm sure she'll understand your hesitations about some things and maybe it'll give her a chance to completely explain her actions.

Good luck!
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Old 09-08-2006, 04:59 AM   #8
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Re: BIG daycare issue- WWYD?

I would be upset. She has no right to go beyond your requests and even think about giving formula. I had 2 allergy kids so if someone had done that really bad things could've happened. With that said, I did have a daycare provider that I liked and after she applied Desitin to my dd's bum (yes, a request in writing to NEVER do that) I did giver her another chance. My dd was SEVERLY allergic to Desitin so it actually made it worse and she got to witness that first hand. I am sure she just wanted Bell to be happy and content and figured that food was the best way. I say freeze some breastmilk for times like that so she has a backup and does not even think to resort to formula
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Old 09-08-2006, 07:43 AM   #9
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Re: BIG daycare issue- WWYD?

I understand you being upset, but I agree with many of the PPs. Do you have a backup supply of BM there for the daycare worker? I know that I had to leave a can of formula at my daycare, just in case that she drank all the BM and was still hungry after that. It's not like your daycare worker can whip out the boob and produce milk for her, so she would have to resort to formula if she didn't have any extra BM.

Also, she was at her wits end with a fussy baby. You didn't answer your phone, and she thought that she had over an hour more to deal with an unhappy baby.

I would give her another chance and just make sure that she does have adequate BM and other things that you DO approve of to try to comfort your daughter.
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Old 09-08-2006, 08:04 AM   #10
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Re: BIG daycare issue- WWYD?

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