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Old 01-23-2012, 03:02 PM   #1
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How do you get two toddlers to sleep

When there is only one of you? Especially during times of transition?

J used to be a toddler that wanted a bottle and his crib (horrible sleeper as an infant, but for about a year he was pretty easy once we stopped cosleeping) So I would put j down, crab c and nurse him to sleep in my bed. But now j is in a big boy bed, and c got the boot from Dh (we have a queen and dh was tited of getting pushed/hit/kicked in his sleep). I can't figure out how to make this work. We've tried so many arrangements. Boys in one room, boys in separate rooms, j in toddler bed, full bed (so I am more comfortable during nightwakings), crib with crib tent (now broken). It takes an hour and a half to get them down (on a good night/day) and they never sleep long. I'm up atleast every two hours at night and usually only get a 30 min nap out of them. They only sleep off and on for about 10 hours (again, on a good night). I'm exhausted and nobody is getting good sleep in this house.

I don't know if I should find a way back to cosleeping with c and but another crib tent for j (seems to sleep better in the crib, but is potty training), or if there is hope that this transition will smooth out and my kids will sleep again.

My hubby is here for bedtime, and is very helpful, but I try not to wake him in the MOTN. though lately, I've needed him atleast briefly most nights.

I'm getting to be a cranky mama with all the lack if sleep. And I hate that someone say they have a magic solution???

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Old 01-23-2012, 10:04 PM   #2
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Re: How do you get two toddlers to sleep

Well mine share a room and what helped me the best is sticking to a pretty strict bedtime routine. Bath, snack, teeth, 1-2 stories then tuck in and lights out. I aim to have them in bed by 7:30. I keep the door closed all the way and keep a night light. Now this doesn't work all the time and some nights I have to keep tucking them back in but consistency pays off for sure! Once they realize that no matter what they say or do, they are going back to bed then the behavior stops and they settle down and sleep. I know my ds plays for a bit and they do talk, but as long as they stay in the room I don't worry about it.
one thing that might help is no naps? Mine both stopped napping pretty early (compared to most toddlers anyway). It honestly wasn't worth the almost 2hrs it took to get them down for a nap so I said the heck with it and, with no naps it's been a bit easier for them to settle at night. I do still cosleep with my ds, he is needier than my dd, and he'll crawl into bed usually anywhere between 10pm-2am (we are all sharing a bedroom until we find a new place to rent).
It was hard to get to the place I'm at but just making sure I had the routine and I was consistent is what got me through. Oh and both mine are in normal twin beds, both hated the crib and slept better on normal beds. Good luck!
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Old 01-24-2012, 07:42 AM   #3
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Thanks mama! I have considered skipping the naps, but the afternoons are really hard when I do. Both get whiney and ods starts pushing and hitting yds. Then if we go anywhere after what should have been naptime they fall asleep in the car. I don't know if there is an adjustment period or if that is just a sign that that still need a nap.

I definitely need to be more consistent. I think part of the problem is we changed too much, too fast, and then too often. I am just so exhausted I can't see my way out.
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Old 01-24-2012, 08:56 AM   #4
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Re: How do you get two toddlers to sleep

If toddlers are over tired they can not fall asleep nor can they stay asleep. Sounds to me like they are both over tired. I would start bedtime earlier and put them down for naps earlier too. Naps you can all lay in your bed, can you?

I would also suggest using a lavander oil or something of the like. make sure it is for topical use though. put it on their feet just a drop on each foot.
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Old 01-24-2012, 09:28 AM   #5
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Re: How do you get two toddlers to sleep

I hear you on the car ride!And usually even if they fall asleep in car, they still have to be in bed at the same time. Now they may talk and stuff a bit longer but as long as they stay in their beds no harm for me lol.I think for us there was a transition period when going from nap to none, now the whiny witching hr starts later and doesn't last as long, so I know it will get better!
And obviously every babe is different. I tried for months to force the nap and finally they would sleep and on those days they were up until 10pm some nights! Some kids just don't need naps and I go by how they are if they are especially whiny, clingy then I try a nap. But if they don't fall asleep in 20mins then they won't. Honestly like I said it was getting them to bed by 7-7:30 and having that same routine that really helped because they knew that after bath was story time and then bed kwim?
Now again if they are both driving me up the wall its usually around when I'm making supper and I give them 2 warnings before they go in separate rooms or ends of the house. I usually keep the TV off all day then during that hour or mor I turn it on and slap some shows on for them, or bring out the play dough, something that I know will keep them busy. Now if they are hitting/pushing etc, it's straight to time out no warning and they stay for double the time. My ds is still getting the hang of staying in time out so I constantly have to put him back in lol, but again its consistency and a heck of a lot of patience that helps me!
My SO works very long hours or is out of town most of the time so everything falls on me. I do get frustrated and it's darn hard raising 2 toddlers by yourself! This is why they go to bed early than most I know, so I get my recharge time! Keep at it and get some rest!
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Old 01-24-2012, 09:33 AM   #6
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I one down first.. And have their beds set up do they don't look at each other while they sleep. I usually put the youngest down first cause my oldest gets grumpy if I try him first. Lol.
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Old 01-24-2012, 11:40 AM   #7
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Ok. Trying same room, different beds, and earlier naptime. I'll try to stick this out for atleast two weeks. I am fine if the kids talk in their beds, so long as they aren't winding each other up and stay put (the talking and standing really bug hubby though, so hopefully we will get on the same page).

I'll talk to hubby about an earlier bedtime. It hasn't worked in the past, but we haven't been committed to it since we usually stick with an 8-8:30 bedtime so they get to see dh even when he works late.

I have never had luck getting them to both nap with me in my bed...or sleep together in any bed. They excite each other so much and just play off one another.

We would eventually like them sleeping in the same room, so that's why I am giving this another shot. C is in his cosleeper PNP, and J is in the full.
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Old 01-24-2012, 01:22 PM   #8
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Ugh. C eventually laid down and slept after j exciting him back up several times. J peed in his bed twice (recently pt completely and has now regressed the past 4 days) then wanted to sit on the potty to avoid sleeping. It's been about two hours now and I've given up on j sleeping. I just hope he won't be a terror tonight.

And talked to hubby who disagreed with my solution of putting in the same room different beds, so we will talk about it more tonight. we somehow have to cone up with the energy to get through this transition or I'm going back to cs with c and having dh help with j. This is so frustrating and exhausting.
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