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Old 09-02-2008, 09:02 PM   #1
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Unhappy My midwife suggested we use Baby Wise

I had an appointment today, and both DH and DS came (they always do). I asked my midwife about ppd and she asked me if I had it with DS and how I am doing now. Then she asked me if I ever felt like I wasnt able to handle things and if I thought I needed to be back on meds. I told her the only time was at night because DS still wakes several times wanting to nurse. So she says "well that has to stop, I'm going to give you a book called babywise, have you heard of it?". So she goes on to tell me we need to get DS out of our room tonight (he sleeps on a mattress on the floor) and that even if we have to lock his bedroom door he needs to be in his room. And I absolutly have to stop nursing at night.

I could hardly say anything to her, I was completly shocked and sick to my stomach. I dont know if its the hormones and I'm just overreacting and should just ignore her.

I guess now my question is does anyone have suggestions, tips, books that might be able to offer some insight into a potentially better way to help DS sleep better longer. He was doing really well when my milk supply dropped, he would sleep for 5-6 hour stretch. Now that my milk is back he is up every hour and half to two hours. Thanks for reading and tia for any suggestions.

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Old 09-02-2008, 09:06 PM   #2
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Re: My midwife suggested we use Baby Wise

No you are not overreacting I HATE that book and I mean HATE it! It may work for other parents but I personally think that book is crap. That is me putting it lightly. My DD 13 months still wakes multiple times a night. I would never ever even think of turning to baby wise.
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Old 09-02-2008, 09:08 PM   #3
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Re: My midwife suggested we use Baby Wise

Quote:
Originally Posted by AggieMoma View Post
I had an appointment today, and both DH and DS came (they always do). I asked my midwife about ppd and she asked me if I had it with DS and how I am doing now. Then she asked me if I ever felt like I wasnt able to handle things and if I thought I needed to be back on meds. I told her the only time was at night because DS still wakes several times wanting to nurse. So she says "well that has to stop, I'm going to give you a book called babywise, have you heard of it?". So she goes on to tell me we need to get DS out of our room tonight (he sleeps on a mattress on the floor) and that even if we have to lock his bedroom door he needs to be in his room. And I absolutly have to stop nursing at night.

I could hardly say anything to her, I was completly shocked and sick to my stomach. I dont know if its the hormones and I'm just overreacting and should just ignore her.

I guess now my question is does anyone have suggestions, tips, books that might be able to offer some insight into a potentially better way to help DS sleep better longer. He was doing really well when my milk supply dropped, he would sleep for 5-6 hour stretch. Now that my milk is back he is up every hour and half to two hours. Thanks for reading and tia for any suggestions.

wow, i'm shocked & not in a good way!!! your son is what, 17 months? same age as my boy and he doesn't sleep any better than yours (probably worse).
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Old 09-02-2008, 09:11 PM   #4
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Re: My midwife suggested we use Baby Wise

mama, that stinks, I would have been really upset as well. I don't really have any suggestions as DD did the same thing for a very long time.
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Old 09-02-2008, 09:12 PM   #5
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Re: My midwife suggested we use Baby Wise

Yeah, I hate babywise too. I'm an AP parent all the way. My 22 month old still gets up at least once or twice a night and ends up in our bed around 4 a.m. every morning. And I'm due in April. It worries me, too. I don't know how I'll handle both of them, but I know we'll figure it out. Daddy will have to help or something, but I'm not willing to let him CIO, I just don't believe in that.
Good luck, mama. I hope you find a good solution.
As for your MW, that stinks. You hope that a MW will be more educated about extended nursing, APing, etc. One of the big reasons I'm going with a MW is so I don't have to argue with an idiot OB about whether I should nurse during pregnancy. hugs!
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Old 09-02-2008, 09:17 PM   #6
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Re: My midwife suggested we use Baby Wise

OMG from what i heard...babies were dying of malnutrition and the publisher stopped printing the book, now its selfpublished, that book is just plain BABY MEAN! it may work for some ppl but i dont agree
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Old 09-02-2008, 09:18 PM   #7
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Re: My midwife suggested we use Baby Wise

Oh my, I can't believe she said that! WOW! There is a great book that helps specifically with this problem and it has an attachement parenting approach. It's not a quick fix but it does work! It's called The No Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley. I loved that book!
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Old 09-02-2008, 09:21 PM   #8
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Re: My midwife suggested we use Baby Wise

I don't have any advice because my DD has slept through the night (8 hours or more) since she was 12 weeks old. Naturally. No CIO, I don't refuse to take care of her needs if she does wake up, but it is very rare.
I do want to give you and remind you that you are doing the right thing for your child. Maybe check out the AP book that pp mentioned about getting baby to sleep regularly.
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Old 09-02-2008, 09:24 PM   #9
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Re: My midwife suggested we use Baby Wise

The only suggestion I have is to fire your midwife. Anyone who thinks like that I certainly wouldn't want part of my birth, or pregnancy just my
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Old 09-02-2008, 09:33 PM   #10
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Re: My midwife suggested we use Baby Wise

I don't know anything about the book, but my 2 1/2 yr old DD wakes up and comes to our bed every night. Sometimes I take her back to her room after she falls asleep and she may come back again. Sometimes DH or I sleep on the couch. I am due in 2 1/2 weeks and know that it will be harder nursing the baby at night to have our older DD in our room but, we will make it work. I am not about to lock my little girl in her room so she can be terrified.

BTW, my DD has never slept through the night and she is 2 1/2. Oh well, some kids do and some don't. Eventually she will grow up.
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