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Old 02-19-2012, 11:29 AM   #21
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Re: I'm not greedy, just really bummed (just venting)

You're not being greedy at all! I had this same problem. My sister said she'd throw me a meet the baby party. I never had a baby shower with DS1, and this is likely our last. I vented about it on another forum and got all sorts of "SUCK IT UP!" kind of replies that hurt my feelings even more, so I'm so glad you haven't gotten those!!

My sister must just have been having a bad day and feeling overwhelmed and making it sound like she didn't want to do it. She started asking about invites again and discussing if we'd want it in early April to avoid having a party when our friend may be in labor because she's due late April, or wait until baby is over a month old(still don't know the answer to that one!).. so looks like party is back on. But man, when I thought I wasn't having one after all, I cried almost all last Sunday morning. I was just emotionally devastated.

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Old 02-19-2012, 12:23 PM   #22
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Re: I'm not greedy, just really bummed (just venting)

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You're not being greedy at all! I had this same problem. My sister said she'd throw me a meet the baby party. I never had a baby shower with DS1, and this is likely our last. I vented about it on another forum and got all sorts of "SUCK IT UP!" kind of replies that hurt my feelings even more, so I'm so glad you haven't gotten those!!

My sister must just have been having a bad day and feeling overwhelmed and making it sound like she didn't want to do it. She started asking about invites again and discussing if we'd want it in early April to avoid having a party when our friend may be in labor because she's due late April, or wait until baby is over a month old(still don't know the answer to that one!).. so looks like party is back on. But man, when I thought I wasn't having one after all, I cried almost all last Sunday morning. I was just emotionally devastated.
I am grateful that everyone here has been so supportive (not just in this post, but others I've made as well). Also thought I'd get a lot of "suck it up" responses because I did feel greedy making a registry for a second baby.

Between work and just feeling depressed or sick, I haven't seen any of my IRL friends for a couple months. Aside from my mom, no one has been very emotionally available (if that makes sense) when I need someone to lean on. I really do need to put this behind me, I'm just having a hard time getting over it for some reason.
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Old 02-19-2012, 12:43 PM   #23
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I am grateful that everyone here has been so supportive (not just in this post, but others I've made as well). Also thought I'd get a lot of "suck it up" responses because I did feel greedy making a registry for a second baby.

Between work and just feeling depressed or sick, I haven't seen any of my IRL friends for a couple months. Aside from my mom, no one has been very emotionally available (if that makes sense) when I need someone to lean on. I really do need to put this behind me, I'm just having a hard time getting over it for some reason.
What was on your registry? I'm being nosy not that I think you were at all being greedy(cloth diapers are in no way greedy!).
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Old 02-19-2012, 09:35 PM   #24
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Old 02-19-2012, 10:18 PM   #25
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Re: I'm not greedy, just really bummed (just venting)

you aren't being greedy and I think that EVERY new baby deserves a party! I have a friend who adopted a girl and had a shower. Then she had a biological child six months later (her first bio child). Some people thought it was silly to have a shower, but we threw one anyway. That rule is old, outdated, and silly IMHO.
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Old 02-19-2012, 11:07 PM   #26
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Re: I'm not greedy, just really bummed (just venting)

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What was on your registry? I'm being nosy not that I think you were at all being greedy(cloth diapers are in no way greedy!).
Well, they where expensive ones. I really like Thirstie's products so I had 4 Duo wraps in both sizes, 18 size one Thristie Duo AIO, a dozen size two Duo AIO, 10 ME Sandies size small, 10 ME Sandies size large, some Thirstie's hemp doublers, 2 wet bags, a dozen flats, flushable liners and Snappis. So yeah, kinda pricey items-but I honestly didn't expect anyone to buy anything off the list. Mostly I'm just really hoping to win the $500 in gift cards, lol. I just really fell in love w/ the Duo AIO that I got to see what it's like and already liked the wraps. It's not that I need more diapers, I just wanted some girly stuff since all I have now is very boy-ish. Not that Bean will care what she poops in, but I do.
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Old 02-20-2012, 04:04 PM   #27
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Re: I'm not greedy, just really bummed (just venting)

Aw, I just want to squeeze you because I KNOW HOW THAT FEELS. My mom threw me a baby shower last year because it was my fourth baby and I had NEVER HAD A BABY SHOWER, and NONE of my friends showed up. A lot of older folks that I had grown up around in church.... that's it. (I was glad they were there though!) I was so disappointed in my friends, but.. yanno, that seems to be the type of people I've made friends with my whole life until recently.

This time around, a bunch of girls that I fellowship with in our house church group organized a baby shower... and of course, my friends outside of the church group DID NOT COME even though several of them RSVPed yes. I wasn't surprised at all.

I was grateful to have a new set of friends who are really there for me, but I didnt even bother to invite half of the girls I used to hang out with regularly because they always flake out.
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Old 02-20-2012, 09:28 PM   #28
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Re: I'm not greedy, just really bummed (just venting)

Thanks McMandy, it does help make me feel better. I'm glad you've got people you can count on now.

The thing that bothers me the most, is these are people who have been there for me in the past. I've bent over backwards for them and they've done the same for me in times of crisis. It's like ever since I had kids though, I've become to "radical" for them. We seldom spank, I breastfed Gman past 6m (got a lot of "eww, gross" or "why bother" on that one), cloth diaper, baby wearing, etc. It seems the further I get from their idea of what should be, the less time they have for me. The signs where there, I just chose to ignore them.
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Old 02-20-2012, 09:44 PM   #29
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Re: I'm not greedy, just really bummed (just venting)

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Aw, I just want to squeeze you because I KNOW HOW THAT FEELS. My mom threw me a baby shower last year because it was my fourth baby and I had NEVER HAD A BABY SHOWER, and NONE of my friends showed up.

With my first baby, i had been living in TX (military) but moved home when DH deployed when i was 7m along. My moms best friend, who i'd grown up knowing and getting together with, threw me a shower. My mom was a teacher and all her friends, whom i'd grown up knowing but weren't MY friends, came. I only invited a few of the people i'd kept in contact with....One showed up half drunk, 1 showed an hour late, and the one i thought was my best friend who had rsvp'd yes, didn't show at all or bother to call/text. It stung. Later she said she just didn't feel like going. Yeah, we're no longer friends, for many other reasons, but i think that was the start of it.
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