Anyone use techniques for not tearing?

[colin-mylilguy]

I can tell you what not to do.

No, but really, what the others have said about "sometimes tearing happens" and "it's not because you did anything wrong" is so true! There are some circumstances that you just can't avoid.

For me, I had a 2nd degree tear and I blame it on three things:

1) my midwife and L&D nurse got all up in arms about the baby's heart rate going down and that we needed to get him out FAST!!! Turns out, his heart rate was fine, he was hunky-dory in there and the "slow" heart-rate they got was mine... a nice normal 78 for an adult, laboring mama.... So I pushed harder and faster and *popped* his head out, which *popped* my skin open, with it. I literally felt a *pop* but it didn't hurt. It was more of just a pressure release sorta feeling. And I didn't feel the "ring of fire", fwiw. I don't think everyone does.

2) I pushed against my body. I started off pushing naturally, and as I felt the need to. Then my midwife and nurse got all adamant that I push harder (because they mistakenly thought my baby's heart rate was low...) and I stopped listening to my body and did what they told me to do. My body said "slow down, breathe through the pushing, take your time" while my midwife and nurse were yelling at me, in typical hollywood-type-style, to "PUSH!!! HARDER!!!!" and it was completely unnerving. I didn't like it and I won't be using that midwife again. She was my only option at the time and for the most part she was good... but she wasn't great.

3) I pushed on my back while in the tub. My body wanted to push on my hands and knees but my midwife wanted me on my back.... How, you might ask, was I even able to push on my back in the tub??? Good question! It was awkward, I'll say that. It didn't feel natural and I wasn't a huge fan but I wanted my baby out and I wasn't in the mood to argue so I did as I was told... I regret that. Oh well.

Just listen to your body, above all else. It knows what it is doing.

And if you do tear, don't worry. It's not the end of the world and it heals up just fine (in most cases) and don't listen to the horror stories. That won't do you a bit of good and will just scare you.

[HeatherGlasby]

I used prim rose oil which is used to soften the cervix, but it also softened everything else. My baby shot out like a rocket, went from barely crowning to entirely out in one push and I didn't tear at all.
I would say it was MOSTLY because I had him in the water, my midwife said that was probably why I didn't tear. I should have been torn to pieces with how he came out!

[Michelle_M]

Honestly... perinial massage!

I had an episiotomy with my first son.

With DS2 and DS3, I did not have any tearing nor did I need an episotomy because I started the perineal massage at about 34 weeks and did it every night religiously. It doesn't have to hurt. Try starting with less pressure, and only stretching until it's slightly uncomfortable. Gradulally you'll be able to use more pressure and stretch it a little more.

And also make sure your midwife, labor nurse, or partner is going to be willing to do perinial massage on you during your labor. With DS2 and DS3, my Midwife did the massage as the baby was getting into position. This avoided the tearing and the need for an episiotomy, despite the fact that I had the scar tissue from the first labor.. which makes tearing more likely.

God bless!

[AniMommy]

I did the perineal massage in the shower every night after 36 weeeks. I did feel like a dufus. I agree with the pp who said you shouldn't be causing yourself pain, but just a bit of discomfort.

I didn't have any tearing but I had a small baby, 6#.