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Old 03-26-2012, 05:12 AM   #1
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GreyMum
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How to manage with 2 babies or when mom wants another and dad is happy with just one

Ok, so I don't know what to do, but DH and I are very much on opposite sides re: wanting more kids. By way of background, he is 40, I am 38. Our first baby is 14 months old. She is the light of our lives. DH thinks she is the perfect baby and sees our family as complete. I (who never used to want children, but mostly because my family is very small and was never around kids) would very much like another baby. I had always identified myself by my career, but now, without doubt, I am a mother. I feel like I have found my place in the world, and it is to be a mother.

I am starting to come to terms with the fact that she may be our only child, but it is hard.

DH very much understands my point of view. I tell him frequently.

His main reasons for not wanting another is that he sees our family as complete, is exhausted (he is very much a co-parent) and he says he is too old. (I realize there are a lot of younger mamas here, but please do not focus on our age. I really do not see this as an issue.) He's also been asking a lot of questions about how would it be possible to care for two. He thinks our daughter would not receive as much attention. We do both dote upon her now.

So, I guess the question I have is -- how much harder is two in terms of time, work? How do you make it work?

Please note, this is a very sensitive topic for me. I always shy away from posting personal topics like this, out of concern that I will receive responses I don't want to hear.
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