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Old 03-28-2011, 07:42 AM   #21
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Re: How to raise kids with good morals?

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I personally don't understand what it has to do with you and your children at all. There are many, many things I don't agree with in this world. As long as I live my life the way I think is right and provide my children with the tools to make wise decisions on their own, I can't really worry about what "so and so" down the street is doing. I have open and honest discussions with my 4 year old about situations that come up. We talk about if the person made the right decision or why we as a family feel x is inappropriate. I need not put down other people or make it an us vs. them issue for him to get the point. He sees *good* decision making modeled to him every day.

The rest I have to let go because I can't control the person he will be, I can only guide them in the direction I think is best. I SERIOUSLY would not give your BIL and his situation one more thought since it doesn't affect you in any way. If people bring drama to your doorstep then close the door. You getting all worked up about it like it's going to effect your every day life is just feeding the drama. Also judge not and all that good stuff. I smile and nod at crazy family members and have some more pie.
Excellent post and I 100% agree. There is a scripture I love.

It's from 1 Thessalonians 4:11:

And to make it your ambition to lead a quiet life and attend to your own business and work with your hands, just as we commanded you, so that you will behave properly toward outsiders and not be in any need.

As long as we are doing what we need to do in our own families, not judging others and truly believe that God is in control instead of worrying about everyone else, all things will work together for the good of those that love Christ Jesus and are called according to his purpose [Romans 8:28].

We may not be of the world, but we do have to live in it. Living by wordless example is often the best way to reach anyone. Plus having not walked a mile in a person's shoes in ANY situation let's us know that we can't possibly know every detail, thought and reason as to why things are occurring the way they do. Not that it makes a decision any more right, but often for a person feeling scared, alone and not sure what to do will drive them to do things that others feel are less than desirable. Especially when it comes to caring for their child(ren). That primitive instinct to preserve and protect our children can drive us to do some crazy things sometimes.

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Old 03-28-2011, 09:17 AM   #22
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Re: How to raise kids with good morals?

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I think non-religious people hear implication. By bringing up "I'm religious, and trying to be religious despite the world" there is an implication that 'the world' isn't religious, and being immoral. Being religious has no bearing on being moral. KWIM?

Which, the assumption on the non-religious person's part is jumping to conclusions. However, I know I have heard this statement from people before, and you develop a twitch after a lifetime of the assumption that you are amoral because you aren't religious.
Thank you...well said And yes, I do get all eye and neck twitchy

Eta: oh ya, when it's really bad my foot gets twitchy - to the point of 'can I kick you now?' Just a hot, twitching mess!!
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Old 03-28-2011, 09:50 AM   #23
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Re: How to raise kids with good morals?

It seems to me that your children have no need to know the details of their uncle's finances. It might be confusing to young children anyway.

With respect to moral education, modeling good behavior is a wonderful start, but once your children are old enough, I think it's good to have open discussion with respect to ethics and morality. Rather than just laying out the rules, your children are more likely to behave morally if they are engaged in the subject.

Talk to them about what makes something right or wrong: because God says so and because mommy says so are starting points, but it might be useful to look at how actions affect other people. An action might be wrong if it hurts someone, right if it benefits someone. It's also useful to discuss actions that have some benefits and some harmful aspects. If your children are routinely in the habit of questioning the effects of their actions on themselves and others, chances are better that they will make moral decisions.
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Old 03-28-2011, 02:32 PM   #24
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Re: How to raise kids with good morals?

of course I know that being religious has no bearing on being moral, since I am non religious myself. and i heard no such implication there, hence the post.

I am non-religious and every time I defend someone who is religious, people assume I am religious :P that assumption has never failed me.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kriket View Post
I think non-religious people hear implication. By bringing up "I'm religious, and trying to be religious despite the world" there is an implication that 'the world' isn't religious, and being immoral. Being religious has no bearing on being moral. KWIM?

Which, the assumption on the non-religious person's part is jumping to conclusions. However, I know I have heard this statement from people before, and you develop a twitch after a lifetime of the assumption that you are amoral because you aren't religious.
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Last edited by naura; 03-28-2011 at 02:35 PM.
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Old 04-01-2011, 11:37 AM   #25
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Thanks to everyone for the encouraging words. Please keep hubby & I in your thoughts & prayers.
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