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Old 06-17-2011, 01:39 PM   #1
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a little vent about my nieces...

I changed the title from "a vent about teen moms" so that people wouldn't find it offensive...

My neice was 15 when she had her baby, my youngest neice is 12 and wants to have a baby and her status on fb today was that "2 of her friends are in labor " ... so I said "who's having a baby now?" she said their names and I wanted to say "is that all you dumb teenage girls do is get knocked up YOU IDIOTS!" Obviously I didn't, but I badly wanted to, so I came here to vent instead! I have nothing against teen moms. Infact if your smart, you do it right and really try to do what's best for your baby then good for you! If you are like my neices who just want babies to "fit in" and haul the baby around like a d*** doll then GET A LIFE!!!

They were raised by their idiot mother who has 5 kids, 2 from my brother, and the other 3 each have different dads...she's taken money from churches the kids have either been kicked out of school or she "forgot" to enroll them so they just don't go..this has happened their whole life, she works the system to get government money and assistance because she refuses to work. Now my oldest neice is following in her footsteps. It just drives me and my mom nuts! My brother is too much of a lazy chicken to do anything about it, he hates it too but he won't say anything because he's afraid he'll loose his weekends with them. I just feel so bad for feeling like my neices are basically white trash. I love them dearly and I would do anything to help them...infact I gave my neice all of my ods baby clothes, swing, gave her a car seat, books, etc for free when she had her son and she sold them for money so the babies daddy could fix up his fast and furious car and then lied to her church to get new clothes for her son. Really?!

Sorry..thanks for letting me get it out! And I'm sorry if I offended anyone..I don't mean too, my nieces just make me crazy because I have no say.


Laurie. Mother of 2 crazy boys! Wife of 1 crazy husband! Pink Papaya Consultant! Natural home spa and beauty products you'll love!

Last edited by Crew&West; 06-18-2011 at 08:26 AM.
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Old 06-17-2011, 02:09 PM   #2
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Re: a little vent about teen moms...

thats awful. it has nothing to do with them being a teen though. sounds like their mom is just teaching them to leech off society and they have no problem doing that. there are more programs and assistance if these girls have a baby so thats a pull for them (although really messed up). i feel sorry for those babies though.
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Old 06-17-2011, 02:39 PM   #3
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Re: a little vent about teen moms...

gonna agree with the 'nothing to do with them being a teen' part. It's really poor parenting examples. Of course, the peer pressure thing can be rough for teenagers on top of that.

I hate when things cycle like this. You just want to figure out a way to stop the cycle and help them make more positive choices.
SAHM to Magnolia May (09/10), Luke Russett (04/13) and expecting 11/16. Wife and best friend to my airman.
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Old 06-17-2011, 03:02 PM   #4
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Re: a little vent about teen moms...

I heard last week that one of our local high schools has 37 pg girls attending. That was an all time high for them I guess. I don't know what their enrollment is.
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Old 06-17-2011, 03:11 PM   #5
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Re: a little vent about teen moms...

A few years ago I taught a 7 year old, whose mother was 21. His grandmother was 35. She was 28 when she became a grandma. A very sad cycle of poverty, lack of education, and lack of self esteem. None of the dads were in the picture either. That student would now be 12 or 13. I hope he breaks the cycle.

I am so sorry to hear that your niece wants to have a baby at 12. Its a scary world these days. Makes me want to hug my little girl a little harder (and keep her locked up till she's 30 LOL)
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Old 06-17-2011, 03:15 PM   #6
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Re: a little vent about teen moms...

That stinks. Sounds like a lot of the folks around here that receive assistance. It's a sad, sad cycle.
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Old 06-17-2011, 03:37 PM   #7
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Re: a little vent about teen moms...

Yeah TBH, I don't think this is a problem with "teens" as much as it is with the adults in their life! To vent about teen moms makes this kinda seem like this is what you think about teen moms. I know you clarify "not all teen moms, but my neices" but it just puts me on egde a little with the title. There are plenty of grown adults having babies and acting like that and plenty of teens who can be great parents. I happen to think I was one of them. I got pregnant at 15, but I worked as soon as I graduated and worked until dh & I decided I should SAH after having #5. We had #3 at 21, #4 at 23 and #5 at 25. I've never once accepted food stamps or cash assistance. My life would be a heck of a lot different had I waited to have kids, but nothing I can do now but make the best of the situation.
And where are these girls parents? There was a girl in town that everyone knew about because at 13 she was trying to get pregnant. At 14 she succeeded and every other year after that. Her 14yr old daughter is now pregnant! She'll be a gma at 28.
And honestly, my mom was a mom at 16 but gave him up for adoption. She claimed she didn't want me to make the same mistakes she did, was open with me, but I honestly don't recall her TRYING to teach me otherwise. I was allowed to have boyfriends when I was 12-13, two were 16-17! We didn't have sex, but I'm glad I moved from that area when I did or I can promise I would have been pregnant in 8th grade like several other girls in that town. I just didn't have structure and guidance, rules and responsibility. I had to babysit my sister ALL THE TIME and felt like well dang, if I'm taking care of my sister all the time, why not take care of my OWN baby! Little did I know it would be 2 babies and their father would split, but having a baby wasn't like the end of the world to me. It was a little exciting in my immature 15yr old mind really. I wouldn't say I "tried" to get pregnant, but I definitely wasn't scared of it until it actually happened. Then I was like OMG, what did I do... this is gonna be a huge mess. Especially when I found out it was twins!
I wish there was more for kids to do these days that didn't cost so much money. Sports all cost money and take time and commitment from family. Camps and clubs are the same thing. Kids who's parents don't have a lot of money tend to just "hang out" and end up drinking, spending time alone unsupervised with the opposite sex, dabbling in drugs... I mean, it's just unfortunate that these young girls feel that's all they're worth.
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Old 06-17-2011, 03:46 PM   #8
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Re: a little vent about teen moms...

that is SO sad No 12 year old in her right MIND should be thinking about having a baby! I was still playing with Barbies at that age!!!
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Old 06-17-2011, 03:51 PM   #9
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Re: a little vent about teen moms...

Originally Posted by smom050811 View Post
That stinks. Sounds like a lot of the folks around here that receive assistance. It's a sad, sad cycle.

I really doubt most people who receive assistance are "lifers"

I had more typed, but I try not to type while irritated.
I make milkshakes in my yard.
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Old 06-17-2011, 04:00 PM   #10
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Re: a little vent about teen moms...

A former friend of mine was trying to get pregnant since about 16. Her mom died after a life of drugs and addiction. She was trying to go to larger city to get drugs and crossed a big interstate and got hit by a car. She was raised by her mentally ill grandmother and the rest of her family is seriously lacking in morals and a sense of responsibility. She was always on assistance her whole life. She didn't think there was anything wrong with trying to get pregnant when she was still in highschool, even if it meant one night stands. She was living with her sister at the time who had a SERIOUS rat infestation and 10 dogs that pooped and peed all over the house. She knew it was gross, but was still trying to get pregnant and bring a baby home to that.

Fast forward and she's with a guy for a couple of months. She gets pregnant. My sister's fiance offers to fix up his basement into an apartment. They've been living there for over a year and have never paid rent on time, actually will YELL at him, and is a complete freeloader. She got pregnant again her senior year of highschool. She's only been out of highschool since May, and is planning another baby when they are still on government assistance. Yet, when they got their $8,000 tax return this spring, my sister's fiance said as part of the agreement living there they must put it in savings towards a home. They didn't. They spent it on a vacation to see her uncle in Texas and go to the beach, on a couple thousand dollar ring, a touch screen computer, a kinect(sp?), a new tv, and a new computer desk, etc. Now that my sister's fiance is kicking them out because they are three months late on rent (and have never paid rent on time entire time living there), they are crying and boohooing saying how unfair he is and that he doesn't care at all because he won't help them.

It has nothing to do with her age. She's just a bad person, no matter if she would have conceived her first child at 15 or at 27.
Mommy to M (9/09) & G (4/12) & expecting Feb 2014
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