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Old 02-25-2008, 05:20 PM   #1
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Caitlyn Ann's birth story - eta pics in separate post

This is long and unrevised....


So, where to start! On Sunday the 17th I started having really consistent contractions, ranging from every 3 to 7 minutes. They weren’t painful, but annoying, and consumed my energy. I ended up sleeping several times when I could, and really well that night. When I woke up on Monday morning, they were still fresh and going strong, but I have had contractions like that for weeks, usually they disappear overnight, but it didn’t faze me that they didn’t. I was really tired all day Monday, and took a really big 3-4 hr nap while Mike’s mum watched Izzy for me. Later in the evening the contractions started to feel a bit like period pains, but I mostly thought it was from my belly being so huge and my ligaments being stretched and pulled and my muscles being pulled. A lot of it was that!
Around 5pm on Monday the contractions really started to hurt a bit. In my mind, I started to consider this as the beginning of my labour. They didn’t hurt enough for me to change anything I was doing, so I just went about things as normal – and waited to see if it would progress into anything more. Around 9 or 10pm, I think, I was talking to a friend on msn(Lori) and told her I thought it might be, but wasn’t holding my breath as I technically, according to our first ultrasound, I was only 36.6 weeks. Around 11pm they were hurting a bit more, and I was convinced it was labour. I walked around the house gathering some things for a hospital bag, and around 11:30pm I woke Mike up. I shook him a little and told him to wake up because “I’m in labour,” and I swear I’ve never seen such big whites of eyes in a dark room hehe. He jumped up and frantically ran about the house aimlessly, while I called the birth centre.
One of my main concerns was that I wasn’t quite 37 weeks, so one of the first things I did was tell the midwife and ask her if I had to go to the labour ward. She said, according to *someone’s* dates, that I was “right on 37 weeks” and to come in if I thought I was in labour. She didn’t really seem to think I was, but I knew I was by that point, so we left soon after, and arrived around 12:30am. I had such a fast delivery with Izzy, and I had a feeling that this time I might have placental problems (just a feeling, and it kept popping into my head), so we left as soon as I started to feel uncomfortable with the contractions. As soon as I arrived I made myself comfortable, and went about laboring. I asked Mike, MIL, and Izzy to wait in the other room for the moment. I just wanted to be alone for a while. I concentrate so much better on my own, and I didn’t need any support then, and didn’t really want to be “watched” so to speak.
After almost an hour of laboring in the room alone, I asked my midwife if I could go in the bath. She was worried I was close, considering my contractions and fast labour with Izzy, and wanted to check me – I said that was fine, and I was about 3-4cm at the time. She cleaned the tub and filled it up – which seemed to take forever for me! I hopped in while it was still filling up, and was instantly relaxed. I was already tired from not sleeping as much as my body needed over the past few days, so it was lovely that I was able to sleep between contractions. I mostly laid/floated on my back, which slowed my labour, but was relaxing enough to give me some extra energy. I noticed and was very aware that when I moved into any other position that my contractions started to top each other and progress, but I was tired! A kept switching back and forth between a resting position and a progressing position for several hours. Mike kept coming and going, getting me drinks and such, but towards 5am I asked him to stay. I was starting to feel discouraged because I was really tired and didn’t WANT to switch positions – I just wanted to sleep!! I could feel my body wanting me to move though, having urges to push and such.
Around 5:30 or so the midwife came in and suggested I hop out soon to try something different to progress the labour. I was in between contractions, which were about 4-5 minutes apart, and I started to cry to Mike, telling him how discouraged I was, but how tired I was too. I was starting to feel like I couldn’t do it, but he reassured me and comforted me, making me feel stronger. With one massive LONG contraction, incredibly painful too, I dilated completely, and my waters burst with such a force it left whirlpools in the water! (LOL) It hurt SO bad, and instantly I knew I had to get out of the water. I wanted to be on my hands and knees again. Mike and the midwife helped me out of the tub, with the contraction still lingering, and helped me into my room. I wasn’t even to the bed before the next one started. From this point on, it felt like one massive contraction, with no breaks in between. I started screaming and felt really out of control. As soon as I was kneeling and leaning over the bed my body started to push. It was almost completely involuntary, though with each and every loud blood-curdling scream I was letting out, I was pushing as hard as I could. And poor Mike though he’d gotten away with no screaming this time(he must be half deaf from going through that twice now!). I was squeezing his hand while screaming and pushing, and he’s sure I broke it .
About 15 minutes from the time my waters broke I pushed her out! It was quick, and for a few minutes I was completely out of control, but with the help and encouraging words of the lovely midwife I had, and Mike(and his hand), I managed to pull it together and push her out quickly! Might I add she was born the same time Izzy was, at 5:55am hehe.
This point onwards is where my problems started. She came out lovely and pink/red – breathing quickly, but not screaming, and I started to bleed heavily. I hopped on the bed with her, and Mike went and got Izzy and MIL. Izzy was so excited, she just wanted to sit really close to me and whisper “bebe” and touch her forehead to mine so she could grin and look me straight in the eyes. It was the most beautiful moment I’ve ever experienced, and one I’m sure to never forget! Her reaction just took my breath away.
Twenty or so minutes after delivery, still bleeding heavily and trying desperately to push my placenta out, the midwife suggested to try the shot of sintocin. I agreed and kept pushing, but I wasn’t having strong contractions, and the placenta didn’t seem to be separating at all. We cut the cord, and she gave me the shot. I started to feel awful, knowing I had so many thoughts of this happening again while I was still at home, and not being in control of anything. I wanted desperately for things to just go normally – straightforward. I was crying, and started to become hysterical, completely freaking out. The midwife tried to massage my stomach, and brought in another midwife to try as well. They gave me the gas to suck on while doing it, but it hurt more than labour did.
Once the second midwife had a go and nothing had changed, I gave up inside. I was crying harder, and saying how I didn’t want this to happen again over and over. They brought a doctor in, who also tried to massage. After another few minutes of them pushing and pulling, they decided to try and see if it was near my cervix and if maybe it was stuck. They had me sucking on the gas, Mike holding Cait, one midwife on my side holding my hand, then tried to feel. The doctor pushed in on my placenta from my stomach and was trying to reach inside me and see if he could feel it. Two different doctors tried that, over a course of 15 minutes. Even with the gas, it was the most painful and terrifying experience I’ve ever had. Somewhere in there it amounted to 5 people pushing/pulling and trying to remove it, and a shot or two of pethadine as well. The last person who tried to push and pull got a big telling off by Mike. I was screaming that it hurt too bad and I wanted them to stop, and they wouldn’t. He yelled at them to stop and that I’d had enough. I’m so glad he was able to stand up for me when they weren’t listening. It meant the world to me, and still does.
They started talking to me about manual removal, and saying how it’s best if they do an epidural and have me be awake. I had given up over an hour earlier, as by this time it was over two hours since birth. I asked to call my mom, so they had the doctors wait outside, so I could call and cry to her, telling her how terrified I was and such. I also got to talk to my sister for a brief minute. When the doctor came back in, I said I didn’t want an epi, I’d rather go under. I just wanted to go to sleep – I was so tired, and so defeated I couldn’t imagine them making me stay awake for more of “this.” The doctor said they could do that if I wanted, so I felt a bit relieved. They gave me another shot of pain med’s and brought in a bed to transfer me to. I had asked to have Caitlyn weighed before leaving, and was a bit surprised she weighed more than Izzy did, who was 7lb 13oz at 38.3 weeks gestation. Mike was able to walk with me, while holding Cait, to the doors of the theatre, and I didn’t stop sobbing throughout the entire time. He kissed me goodbye and tried to reassure me again, but I was just so desperate for it to all go away, to just sleep and be out of it.
As soon as I was in theatre and the anesthetist was speaking to me, I asked her to put me under right then. The doctors weren’t ready yet, and from what I remember they were still trying to locate one of them in the hospital, but she said ok and put me under. I was so relieved, and was instantly able to relax. I’m pretty sure the operation only lasted about 20 minutes, but I was in recovery for a while as well.
I was taken to the maternity ward and Mike, Izzy, Cait and Mum were all waiting for me there. I felt a lot better, but sleepy, so we all agreed a big rest was about due, so they went home, and I got to check out my new baby and get some much-needed sleep. They came back later in the afternoon, and things went a bit downhill again. I was on antibiotics to reduce infection from the removal, and to pump some fluids in me as well as sintocin since my uterus wasn’t doing its job on its own, but they gave me the OK to get up and such. With Mike helping me I managed to make it to the toilet, but before I even got there(it was only a few metres away) everything went black and I couldn’t hear anything. I sat there for a minute waiting to see if it would change, and it didn’t, so I had him help me back to the bed and call the nurse. They took blood immediately, and tiled my head so I was head-down at an angle. I later was told that in pregnancy my hemoglobin(blood levels) was at 127, by the time I went to theatre it was at least as low as 107, and when I went to the toilet, it was at a dangerous low of 60. I essentially had lost half my blood, and somehow they semi-missed it! I was given two units of donor blood (two litres), and had to lay upside down for quite a while. Later that night I had another episode which resulted in shivers, from my body starting to go into shock from everything.
They took some blood at midnight, and again later on Wednesday, and my hemoglobin was up to around 90. I felt like a new person, with so much energy, but still very pale and weak. I got up and was walking around, even got to take a shower. I loved the individual attention I was able to give Caitlin, and sleep when I wanted, but I also wanted desperately to get OUT of there, and away from where everything happened. On Thursday we finished intravenous antibiotics, and they prescribed me with some oral ones to take at home, as well as iron. My abs were 4-5 fingers apart, so the physio I was seeing decided to give me Tubigrip, a tube of elasticized fabric to wear like a panty girdle, over my tummy, to help encourage my muscles back together, and support me a bit better. After a bit more direction of exercises and such, the doctors and midwives decided a lunch discharge was in order. I could’ve stayed longer, but really just wanted to get away!
When we did get home, I was able to just sit back and relax, take a breath, and had a couple really big cries in bed. I had such a beautiful birth, and another easy labour…. I feel so traumatized by everything else it’s hard for me to see that right now. It’s hard to overlook that intense pain, and those feelings.. so indescribable. I hope with more time I’m able to overcome the parts where things didn’t happen how I wanted or expected, and see the experience as a beautiful birth, not a traumatic ordeal.
I have a beautiful daughter, 8lbs 4oz at just 37weeks gestation. She has the typical newborn blue eyes, and her hair looks silvery blonde in the light. She has a nice layer of fat on her, so much so that her ears have dimples that make it look like they’re pierced. She has a large stork mark on her forehead, and a dot that seemed to splash off and land on the tip of her nose hehe. Long skinny feet, and the most adorable little legs. I want to focus on these things, but I still feel quite clouded.

Time is healing. Writing this is healing.


Last edited by bazo0ka; 02-26-2008 at 11:24 PM.
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Old 02-25-2008, 06:02 PM   #2
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Re: Caitlyn Ann's birth story

Wow - glad to hear Cait made it hear safely! Sorry to hear you had afterbirth problems that needed surgery. Hopefully you can recover easily & quickly at home.
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Old 02-25-2008, 07:13 PM   #3
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Re: Caitlyn Ann's birth story

, mama. That was an incredibly touching and moving experience. I hope that you are able to overcome those difficult feelings soon.
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Old 02-25-2008, 07:20 PM   #4
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Re: Caitlyn Ann's birth story

WOW Awesome birth story!!!! Sorry you had probs after!! But glad Caitlyn is healthy!!
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Old 02-26-2008, 08:00 AM   #5
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Re: Caitlyn Ann's birth story

I say keep focusing on the positive mamma. You have a beautiful, healthy little girl on your hands and she is worth EVERY bit of your experience. Keep asking yourself if you'd do it again to get her here safely, and your answer will ALWAYS be YES!

Hugs, I'm so sorry it had to be bad in the end, but I'm so happy that you have your little girl with you to keep reminding you of what your journey was for! Congrats mamma. She sounds wonderful. I can't wait to see pics of another Caitlyn (I have one too!).
Shannon - Loving wife to my Navy man
Mommy to Noah 6.5, Caitlyn 2.5, and Aiden 2-28-08
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Old 02-26-2008, 11:51 AM   #6
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Re: Caitlyn Ann's birth story

I'm so sorry it was so difficult at the end--but thank God for modern medicine so that it was all resolved safelty. You had a beautiful labor and a gorgeous baby with an adoring big sister and daddy---you are blessed. Congratulations on that. Now sit back and enjoy your babymoon!
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Old 02-26-2008, 08:39 PM   #7
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Re: Caitlyn Ann's birth story

Hugs, mama! I'm sorry you had such a tough time at the end, but I loved reading Izzy's reaction, and it sounds like your new LO is beautiful. Heal well -- heal soon.
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Old 02-26-2008, 08:44 PM   #8
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I have a Caitlyn too! Congrats and
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Old 02-26-2008, 11:20 PM   #9
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Re: Caitlyn Ann's birth story

Thanks ladies! I feel I've gotten more support on here, from people I dont know than on anotehr forum I frequent way more!

I now feel, a week or so on, that I had a beautiful birth, and the manual removal hasn't affected that, but in a separate way I still feel very terrified of what happened AFTER. I feel really scared for almsot no reason.. it's hard to describe - but I'm enjoying my little newborn

Anyhow, here are a few photos of our beautiful little one

the moment i described straight after birth.

a few days old

and her first AIO- a small bubblebubs

Last edited by bazo0ka; 04-16-2009 at 05:29 AM.
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Old 02-26-2008, 11:37 PM   #10
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Re: Caitlyn Ann's birth story - eta pics in separate post

Thanks so much for sharing your pics - especially of that special moment with your 2 dd's! So sweet! I am glad to hear that you are now being able to seperate the 2 things (your perfect dd's birth vs. the difficulties afterward) and it sounds like you are healing well, physically and emotionally.
Ann, Mommy to 3 beautiful, boisterous boys:
Liam - 6 1/2, Emmett - 4, almost 5
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