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Old 05-08-2013, 05:37 PM   #71
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Originally Posted by MakingHome
Not only prostate cancer risks and chronic pAin issues but decreased ability to perform sexually and maintain erections are possible outcomes. A shocking number of women on another forum I participated in for years said this had happened to their dh and if they could go back, they would.

Some places I'd read if we were considering it:
https://www.google.com/search?q=post+vasectomy+problems&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&hl=en&client=safari
https://www.google.com/search?safe=active&client=safari&hl=en&ei=a96KUYje C8_GqAGgtICYCA&q=post+vasectomy+sexual+problems&oq =post+vasectomy+sexual+problems&gs_l=mobile-gws-serp.3...94182.98118.0.98627.7.7.0.0.0.0.609.1476. 1j4j1j5-1.7.0...0.0...1c.1.12.mobile-gws-serp.fxkdyTnQtXg
My dh had one last year and has had none of these problem. I guess it may happen to some people but there are risks with every medical procedure.

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Old 05-08-2013, 08:15 PM   #72
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Re: Anyone considering vasectomy an option?

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Originally Posted by Kiliki View Post

My DH is getting his V next week!

.....

It doesn't help that I am just giddy about it and teasing him. (I'm so stupid) I'm excited to never have to worry about this again.
it is awesome. i honestly feel like i was just emancipated.
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Old 05-08-2013, 08:55 PM   #73
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Re: Anyone considering vasectomy an option?

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it is awesome. i honestly feel like i was just emancipated.
I really have mixed emotions. Primarily I am happy and excited. Every once in a while, I feel a twinge of sadness. ... Then my 8wk old baby starts crying and on my way back to bed from nursing him, my 2 y/o starts screaming... and then I just go back to feeling happy and relieved.

After 7 straight yrs being pregnant or nursing, I really just want to sleep, to not feel like a fat, tired blob, to plan a date without thinking about breastmilk, to SLEEP, to enjoy my husband without constant worry of more babies, to not be obsessive about POAS, to not store maternity and newborn stuff, and to sleep. Good Gravy Almighty I really just want to flipping sleep.

I know I will inevitably at some point wish for another. But it's like making yourself put away the Doritos when you realize you just ate 3/4 of the bag by yourself. ... you KNOW if you don't quit now, you will finish off the bag and you'll feel like the Michellin Man.... but dang it! They're so good!

I really love babies. I love pregnancy. I love newborns. I even enjoy labor and delivery! I could seriously have 15 kids. ... But if I don't stop having babies I know I will be a worse mom, spread too thin, with no patience. I will be a worse wife, with no self esteem, no clothes that fit properly, and no energy or time for my DH. And we will need a bigger house and about $5k to pay for the birth....

So the emotional half of my brain says I will someday regret this. The logical side says this is the very best choice for our whole family. And the fat, sore, sleep deprived physical part of me is leaping for joy.

Last edited by Kiliki; 05-08-2013 at 09:19 PM.
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Old 05-08-2013, 09:45 PM   #74
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Re: Anyone considering vasectomy an option?

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So the emotional half of my brain says I will someday regret this. The logical side says this is the very best choice for our whole family. And the fat, sore, sleep deprived physical part of me is leaping for joy.
i hear you. and i think you *will* inevitably mourn not having another newborn. when we finally made our appt last year, i had all of these feelings of sadness about never having another little nursling at my breast, never being drunk on the newborn smell, never seeing the pure joy of a 5 month old when they wake up and see your face. i journaled a lot about it and finally resolved myself to looking to the future--to me, to the fact that i had time to think my own thoughts, remember who i was, to work with and to enjoy ppl my own age, to be my own person and revive an awesome sex life with no more children in our bed. i also thought about my son and daughter, and how much work i had ahead of me to ready them for the world. BUT- I GOT PREGNANT WHILE WAITING FOR MY HUSBANDS APPT. i wasnt even ovulating and the whole thing made no sense whatsoever. it was like a bad dream. i had been crying and saying goodbye to babies...and then i really, really cried when i realized i would be starting all over again. i was 18 when i had my first child. im 32. i feel like my life has been a game of chutes and ladders. oh oh youre almost there...OOPS that was a slide, dude, start over. i will take my time and appreciate this newborn, but i really do like the discussions on world events and history with my 14 yr old, i like talking to her about boys and her cycle and how to handle friends...watching her discover books and ideas and music. i like that my 6 yr old can not involve me in his personal hygiene unless its bath time, that he can find and tie his own shoes, feed the dog, play in our yard with the neighbor while i only glance at them every 10 min, that he can leave me cards under my pillow with misspelled words on them. i like the mobility of older kiddos who can go river rafting and canoeing and hiking for hours on end, i like saying goodbye to everyone in the morning and sitting in the silence drinking my tea before i start working on my writing. just me! and my tea! and my own time. did i mention that i LOVE full-time kindergarten!!

i think with the age gaps ive had (14, 6, and now expecting), its helped me to better understand that the cute little cuddly babies im making are turning into big, very needy people whose needs are not just physical in nature but have turned into very complex emotional and spiritual ones. if its hard work to take care of a newborn baby girl, it is truly hard work to tend to the mind of a 12, 13, 14 yr old girl who is struggling for identity and responsibility in a confusing world. i feel like i need so much of my brain power, time, and energy to effectively come up with ways to mold her and communicate with her in ways that will benefit her now and in her life ahead without me. babies are one thing, its when the issues stop being about thrush and more about "my friend is sending naked pics of herself to a guy she met online bc it makes her feel beautiful", "what do you think a socialist economy would look like in the US", "is it ok to lie when it will accomplish good"...thats when im like, ok, this is enough- ive got my work cut out for me already.
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Old 05-09-2013, 08:31 PM   #75
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Originally Posted by Kiliki
Just thought I'd come add more to this discussion. hi mamas.

My DH is getting his V next week!

I am nervous but also I am excited. We have 4 kids (4 amazing kids) and we are so happy. But we are done. I am ready to get thin and stay thin. I am ready to not have to live on 4 hours of sleep a night. I am ready to not smell like spit-up. I am ready to not think of breastmilk as an accessory to my outfit (those white stripes on my right shoulder? Oh, those are part of my shirt! Aren't they nifty?). I'm ready for no more mastitis EVER, no more swollen, beat up vagina after giving birth, no more diapers (in a few years)...

I'm just done. I never thought I would be, but I am. I've enjoyed this chapter of my life and now it's time to turn the page and start a new one - one where I raise the kids I have and I don't add anymore to the pack. I'm looking forward to it.

I feel nostalgic, I feel scared, I have concerns and worries...

But DH and I are fertile as can be. No permanent solution will = more babies eventually. And the fact that I am not even 30 yet, and my mom is nearly 60 and still having regular periods...which means I could have a good 30 yrs of fertility yet....

Hormonal BC doesn't work well with me. Barrier methods are awful (and I'll be honest - we don't have the best self control to use them properly ). We tried the VCF strips, those were awesome, but I'm pretty sure our last kid is a VCF baby. I also charted and avoided, using ladycomp - that's where my 3rd baby came from.... We're birth control failures.

A V really is the best option for us at this point in our lives. I really hope there are no bad awful side effects. DH's Dad had one and has not had any issues. There is no family history of cancer. My Dad had one years ago and is fine. I'm truly hoping for the best outcome.

DH is so scared of the pain from the procedure. It doesn't help that I am just giddy about it and teasing him. (I'm so stupid) I'm excited to never have to worry about this again. I'll baby DH for a few days. I'll make him soup and give him ice for his "boys". I'll let him lay in bed and watch "Dr. Who" on his tablet. And then, hopefully we'll move on with life and it will not be an issue.
This is SO me. I was DONE after our third. And every single one was conceived on bc. It just does NOT work for us. One was nuvaring, one was th evil (which admittedly I may have screwed up) and the last was Depo. Plus they all messed with me which was unpleasant. So my husband actually decided to get snipped...all on his own. (I was so proud!) it was the BEST decision ever! The day it was done he was sore...nothing a bag of frozen peas couldn't fix. He took a pain pill at the office cause the doc suggested it, but never needed another one. A held off of sex for a week as he was instructed but then that 7th day at like midnight he was jumping on me. Odw in awhile he says there's a twinge but I think that has more to do with rough treatment when he plays with the kids. good luck!
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Old 05-09-2013, 09:12 PM   #76
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Re: Anyone considering vasectomy an option?

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Originally Posted by JustSomeChickVee View Post
There have been associations with prostate cancer. Some people say these concerns have been debunked.... This is my opinion: these men are still producing sperm. That sperm is just going to build up and that has to cause some kind of response from the body. some doctors claim that the sperm cells are just absorbed by the body... again, completely unnatural and IMO has to cause some kind of response.
we've been talking about this for the future and this is what makes us not sure. it really worries me that they are not releasing that fluid. seems like a set up for some issues for sure!
i may decide on a tubes tied even tho its so hard on my body. i may get a tummy tuck or at least fix my hernia so they can do it then...

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Old 05-09-2013, 09:19 PM   #77
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Re: Anyone considering vasectomy an option?

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This. My DH and his family typically are those that fall in the 2% of people who have medical complications. DH had a complication with his tonsillectomy where a branch of his carotid artery runs into his tonsils, so when his scabs fells off, he started bleeding profusely and almost died from blood loss! 2% of the population has that complication, very rare.
sorry to hijack but my daughter had this too so scary. she lost 40% of her blood & had to be transfused. was drained and tired for a yr after. i also lost alot of blood from scab loss but didnt require hospitalization. scary tho.
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Old 05-09-2013, 09:19 PM   #78
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Re: Anyone considering vasectomy an option?

My dh had one about 3 years ago when we knew we were done. We have no regrets and he's had no problems.

There is one thing he said that is the little secret of vasectomies. Some guys feel a twinge or ping where the snip occurred after the fact. Just an odd feeling he carries around with him. Not painful, but odd. But he'd do it again.
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Old 05-09-2013, 09:25 PM   #79
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Re: Anyone considering vasectomy an option?

Quote:
Originally Posted by MakingHome View Post
Not only prostate cancer risks and chronic pAin issues but decreased ability to perform sexually and maintain erections are possible outcomes. A shocking number of women on another forum I participated in for years said this had happened to their dh and if they could go back, they would.

Some places I'd read if we were considering it:
https://www.google.com/search?q=post...&client=safari
https://www.google.com/search?safe=a...rp.fxkdyTnQtXg
oh yikes, now thats not something i would ever chance. i would rely on condoms then.
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Old 05-09-2013, 09:39 PM   #80
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Originally Posted by kej

There is one thing he said that is the little secret of vasectomies. Some guys feel a twinge or ping where the snip occurred after the fact. Just an odd feeling he carries around with him. Not painful, but odd. But he'd do it again.
This is strange. Ive never read this. I wonder if many men have this to varying degrees. I have read some men end up with actual pain that does not go away..Im wondering if the "pain" is at the site where the cut occurred? Maybe some men have zero issues, some get a "ping" and some get serious pain?

I also wonder how many men do not report issues bc its either so small or theyre embarrassed, etc

Eta--i mean the issues are so small..not the other thing...lol

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