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Old 08-05-2015, 06:10 PM   #1
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D&C or Natural Miscarriage Help Needed

We just found out today that our little one has passed. I was 10wks3days today and the heartbeat was gone. I had a scan at 8wks6days and there was a perfect 165bpm.

So sad today that I am beside myself sitting here wondering if I should go ahead with a D&C my doctor scheduled for Monday or if I should try to let the baby be brought to this world naturally, even though he/she is no longer with us I feel like there would be more dignity with the natural process of m/c vs. the abrupt courseness of a D&C which to me seems the same as an abortion.

Although I am afraid of having an extreme amount of pain to go through, I wonder if my mind/body needs this pain to come to the full realization that the baby is lost.

Any thoughts?

Please let me know what you have experienced and what you would do differently.

Thank you


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Last edited by bellybellybuttons; 08-20-2015 at 08:51 AM.
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Old 08-05-2015, 06:19 PM   #2
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Re: D&C or Natural Miscarriage Help needed

and more

My first loss I was going through the pain of possible mc for a month! We saw the hb perfectly on several different us. But was bleeding. Finally the last us showed the baby had passed. I had gone through enough emotional ups and downs that I needed to move on in the grieving process. So we did the d&c that day.

My second mc was natural...didn't know I lost baby before the bleeding started. Going through it was horrible. I miscarried while teaching math to my second graders.

My third mc was natural and emergency surgery. (This one I think you remember) was grocery shopping, felt a pop and gush of blood. About passed out in the check out line. Had to go into the er and have emergency surgery due to the massive hemorrhaging.

Whatever happens it still be horrible and nothing you ever want to experience again...but for me, I think I'd personally go with a d&c again...start the grieving process sooner. Only downside is you don't get to see baby to say goodbye (well and the bills)

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Old 08-05-2015, 06:47 PM   #3
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I'm so sorry mama. I've had many early, natural miscarriages but also a missed m/c at 8 weeks. I chose to take cytotec and that cause bleeding to start in 24 hours. It was hard but worked for us. B
Shannon- married to DH for seven years, mom to DD 6/10/08, DS 8/29/10 and Gabriella Marie (Ella), born on 7/5/12 with Trisomy 13 and in heaven with Jesus. And our rainbow- DS2 12/24/13
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Old 08-12-2015, 01:04 AM   #4
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Unless you have a reason to D&C, I would try naturally. I am currently diagnosed with a m/c, no heartbeat at 8 weeks. I have a D&C scheduled so that the fetus can be obtained for testing, as this is my second, although I am not sure yet whether I am going to go through with it as soon as my Dr recommended.

My first miscarriage was at 6 weeks. The pain was intense for only a few days, maybe just over a week. When it was gone, I yearned to have it back. That pain was my baby. It was a tangible thing I could grasp. I mourned that it was gone and after the bleeding stopped, I was bitterly empty and the pain was something I missed. So for me, I would want the process. But I have family nearby that can take care of me for the duration I need them to.

I think you will know, deep down, whether you want it over with quickly or whether you need to go through the process.

So sorry for your loss, mamma. I hope with whatever choice you make, there are no complications and you receive plenty of support.
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