Garnet Gab -July- Monthly Chat

[Lovinmama3]

We are not regular church goers, but I'm at my parents house (2 hrs away) about every other weekend and we go when we are there. I only have Cooper so he goes to the service with me. We are in a huge Catholic church with a lot of young children and there is always one or mother other babies that make more noise than Cooper so I'm not too worried. We have a cry room that I could go into, but I find Cooper is so well behaved and if we were in there he would probably be woken up when resting from the other crying children around. I grew up going to church service and I think it taught me at an early age what to do while in church - be quiet, respectful, sit and stand when everyone else does or sit and read/color quietly. But every kid is different.

[THBVsMama]

Originally Posted by nrsenadenos I don't know really. I know she said the cord was wrapped around the baby several times and had a true knot. So it may have happened either way. They were monitoring the baby intermittently as well. So I don't know if it was something that would have been caught by hospital monitoring or not. That's always been my biggest concern - that something would happen during delivery - and now having had a baby that was too big for me to physically get out - I don't know that I could do it. I like my medical technology too much I guess. It's just one thing I have a hard time wrapping my head around with home births. Or like on another board I checked out this past pregnancy, which was even crunchier than DS, there were some moms not getting any u/s. Maybe my faith in the medical community is misplaced, but I find comfort in getting that peek at the baby!

I know which board you are referring to. & while I tend to agree more with that board in regards to parenting, I'm too paranoid to go my entire pregnancy without atleast one u/s.

Originally Posted by AmberP Totally random... but I find it funny that I can give birth to a 10lb baby unmedicated, but I get migraine and go running for the Tylenol and Advil

Haha, I know that feeling. Maybe it's because labor pains serve a purpose, but migraine pains are just a worthless pain in the butt?

[nrsenadenos]

Speaking of migraines, do you take anything for them? My neuro gave me Imitrex last visit, but I was told that I have to wait at least 4 hours to nurse again after taking it, preferably 6 or more, so I haven't yet...but my head feels like it is going to explode...


I always find it interesting how different people approach birth. I'd be willing to attempt a med-free hospital birth (that was actually why I was on the other board, someone had suggested that I might be able to find a doula-in-training there who was willing to take a reduced fee in exchange for the birth experience, and I didn't want to do a post and run so I joined the Feb 10 due date room there) but I have absolutely no desire whatsoever to have a home birth. Just doesn't appeal to me. But then I can't say that I've had a bad experience with a hospital birth either, and some of the hospital birth stories I've read made me sad for mom. So it is interesting to see the different perspectives.

[Lovinmama3]

Originally Posted by nrsenadenos I always find it interesting how different people approach birth. I'd be willing to attempt a med-free hospital birth (that was actually why I was on the other board, someone had suggested that I might be able to find a doula-in-training there who was willing to take a reduced fee in exchange for the birth experience, and I didn't want to do a post and run so I joined the Feb 10 due date room there) but I have absolutely no desire whatsoever to have a home birth. Just doesn't appeal to me. But then I can't say that I've had a bad experience with a hospital birth either, and some of the hospital birth stories I've read made me sad for mom. So it is interesting to see the different perspectives.

I totally agree. I would never try for a home birth as it just doesn't appeal to me. I know every birth is different, but I also think some women have an easier time giving birth. After going through what I went through with Cooper I'd be nuts if I attempted a home birth with my next.

[ANDREA0507]

I go to a pretty small church now (actually just started going to this church last April because my boys were behaving so badly at my other church that I was too embarrassed to go there anymore ) and both of my boys are old enough to go to Sunday school on Sunday mornigs now (starts at 3 and ds2 just turned 3 in May) so that has helped A LOT! My boys would get sooo roudy and loud! Soooo embarrassing. I looked like an idoit who couldn't control her children. There isn't a nursery worker at this church.

Actually this is a sore subject for me....haha I'm getting worked up now thinkin about it!

Since Anna hates riding in the car for long trips (new church is 30 mins there and back) in the evenings, I've had to miss a lot of Sunday night and Wednesday night services because I know my nerves couldn't handle having to get on to the boys every 2 seconds, not hear a word of the preaching, and have Anna scream the whole way home.....in fact, I wont go at night alone anymore (and dh doesnt like to go very often )

So to answer your question...I'd put them in a class untill they are 4 or so and better able to understand the need to be quiet. It's NOT worth the battle...at least for me.

[songbird516]

Originally Posted by nrsenadenos You wouldn't be nervous about that? I was just reading a thread about a mom whose baby was born still attempting a HBAC...stuff like that scares me.

I mean just if my water broke I wouldn't go straight to the hospital unless there was a problem (like the baby wasn't moving) I would probably wait 12 hours or so and no cervical checks, etc, and try to encourage the baby to get in a good position, and hope that labor started on it's own before I started down the hospital/iv/pitocin/epidural route. The fact that she wasn't contracting regularly means to me that her body probably knew better. Of course I can't see what the future would have been, but I guess I would just try to let my body do it's thing for a little longer than a few hours. It was only a few hours after her water broke that she was hooked up and then confined to bed, at which point it would have been very difficult for the baby to turn, especially without the cushioning of the amniotic sac.

[songbird516]

Originally Posted by kmtcm4 I totally agree. I would never try for a home birth as it just doesn't appeal to me. I know every birth is different, but I also think some women have an easier time giving birth. After going through what I went through with Cooper I'd be nuts if I attempted a home birth with my next.

Yeah I totally think that people should do what makes them feel the safest, but be informed about choices.

When my friend told me that she was pregnant the first thing I said was, "you can have a home birth!", but that wasn't right for her, and I respected that. I just hope that she hasn't totally lost confidence in her body's ability to birth a baby. I know she can do it.

I personally should have stayed at home. I didn't because I thought that insurance would cover more of the birth than it did, and I could have hired a homebirth midwife for almost as much as I paid to rush to the hospital, pop out a baby, get woken up 10 times in the night and leave the next morning. I hated the hospital and really would have been more comfy at home, but I know that other people wouldn't have made the same choice, and I didn't know that labor would go so fast and easily for me. That's the problem- we can't see the future...but even if labor hadn't had gone like it did I still would have been more relaxed at home. As it was I got made that they weren't letting me push the way I wanted. I mean...really that's a silly thing to be mad about since I had NO interventions, nothing. Most people would just be happy with that...but no, control-freak me is obessesing over the fact that I had to be in the bed for 15 minutes. *sigh*

oh and about church-

We go to our local Kingdom Hall and all of the children sit with the parents, sometimes other adults. We do not have a nursery, so children are taught early on to behave and sit as well as they can and follow along with what is going on according to their ages. Claire does okay most of the time, and then when she gets fussy or talkative I just stand in the back of the auditorium with her or the lobby until she cams down, or I will nurse her in a sling until she goes to sleep.

[AmberP]

I wanted a home birth before I had Ryleigh. I had never heard of 'home birth', but I was afraid of the hospital and thought it would be so much less hassle to have a baby at home. That said, I might have died if I had stayed home, and there was meconium in the amniotic fluid... so I was thankful to be at the hospital. With Sean, everything was so uncomplicated and perfect. The midwife just stood there and chatted and talked to the nurse and reminded me that I could do it. She acted as a doula, coaching and massaging and whatnot. She caught Sean and put 2 or 3 stitches in... that was it. It was the perfect birthing experience imo.

Re Migraines: I take 2 tylenol with some caffeinated beverage then half an hour later take 2 advil. I also do cold washcloths (frozen) over my eyes and on my neck.

[bessaroni]

I've never really had a desire for a home-birth either but I also felt like if I wait too long to go to the hospital I could totally pop the baby out on my own. DH has never been comfortable with the idea of a home birth. Lucky for me, my favorite hospital is only 25 minutes away. I had all four babies there and loved every nurse/caretaker I had. I feel so lucky that way. Also, the hospital cafeteria has the best omelettes and cheeseburgers ever. I loved my experience there. And the same as Amber, I could have died if I wasn't there when I delivered Harriett (placenta wouldn't deliver and I lost a lot of blood).

Church for us (LDS) is with all the kids. The first hour and fifteen minutes is the service and everybody sits with their kids. It can get pretty insane. We try to be reverent and respectful but it is tough keeping a 4 year old, 2 year old and baby quiet for that long. After the service the kids who are 3 and up go to Primary (basically Sunday school) and the kids 18 months to 3 years go to nursery. Kids under 18 months come to classes with the parents. I end up walking the halls a lot


Sorry that you are having so much pain Amber. I've only had a couple really bad headaches in my life and it was not fun. I can't imagine getting them all the time.

Brandi: How are things going for you? Is Emma doing any better?

[THBVsMama]

Originally Posted by songbird516 I personally should have stayed at home. I didn't because I thought that insurance would cover more of the birth than it did, and I could have hired a homebirth midwife for almost as much as I paid to rush to the hospital, pop out a baby, get woken up 10 times in the night and leave the next morning. I hated the hospital and really would have been more comfy at home, but I know that other people wouldn't have made the same choice, and I didn't know that labor would go so fast and easily for me. That's the problem- we can't see the future...but even if labor hadn't had gone like it did I still would have been more relaxed at home. As it was I got made that they weren't letting me push the way I wanted. I mean...really that's a silly thing to be mad about since I had NO interventions, nothing. Most people would just be happy with that...but no, control-freak me is obessesing over the fact that I had to be in the bed for 15 minutes. *sigh*

I should have, too. After all, I delivered Emma barely 20 minutes after getting into my hospital room. I was much more relaxed at home with the contractions, able to walk around, squat, move on my birthing ball.. As soon as I got into my room and changed into the gown I was checked instantly, and when the nurse discovered I was already at an 8 she wouldn't let me back up. Contracting flat on your back is so much more intense, and I'm not sure I could have gone w/o an epidural if it hadn't been so quick and I had no other choice. Don't get me wrong, I'm overjoyed I got my natural delivery, but contracting while being able to walk, bend, get on all 4's, etc, is so much more bearable than being confined on your back in a hospital bed.

I'm not sure what I'll do next time around. DH wants me to do a home birth, but I'm partial to my OB and I actually kind of enjoy the hospital stay. However, I refuse to be confined on my back again for any amount of time. I mean, what other mammal can you think of births flat on their back like that? I wish we had a birthing center in our hospital that was more mother-friendly, as opposed to medical-friendly.

Okay, I'll end now before this turns into even more of a rant than it already is

Originally Posted by bessaroni Brandi: How are things going for you? Is Emma doing any better?

I'm just taking it one day at a time. I'm trying to accept that, at the moment, she is not a very good sleeper and needs me in the MOTN. If I quit trying to have higher expectations for her at night, then I can't be let down, right? Last night was better. She only woke about 3x all night, as opposed to the 10ish the other night. I know she's going through a g/s because she's nursing like mad. I tried to up her solids a bit more thinking she needed more milk feeds and solid meals, but she's really not interested beyond dabbling here and there. She'll take a few bites, but quickly becomes distracted with random objects. I'm not going to push it, either.

Thanks for asking, though & on an upside, her naps seem to be getting better. She's down to 2, but they're usually about an hour long each now. I'll take that any day over 20 minute cat naps.