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Old 08-06-2010, 03:18 PM   #1
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How old to look for something?

Or at the very least HELP look for something?

I asked DS (5.5) to help me find a library book HE LOST. And he won't do it. He stands in the middle of the room and looks around or puts his fingers up to his eyes to make binoculars I said "James, come on, here is a photo (off the library website) of the book. THIS is what we're looking for. Come help me look." and he says he has to 'think it through' what this means I have no idea.

Is 5.5 too young to look for something? He can read so he could find the title. I even gave him ideas! Check under your bed, under the crib, in your toy box, in Aldria's toy box, under my bed, under the coffee table (I was looking other places) and he just won't do it.

Thoughts??

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Old 08-06-2010, 03:26 PM   #2
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Re: How old to look for something?

My DS#1 (3)can find almost anythign I ask of him. His best buddy can find something that anyone set down (as long as he saw it) even if weeks passed (that child is amazing at finding ANYTHING!) So in my experience, the little ones around me seem to be able to find what they are asked to. Unless they are being difficult, than they can't find their own pants. Even if they are wearing them
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Old 08-06-2010, 03:30 PM   #3
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Re: How old to look for something?

I don't know how or when our little angels turn into such manipulators. It will only get worse if you don't nip it in the bud. Don't enable him. He can do it. Maybe explain that a missing book means no more library books? Figure out what *motivates* him and stick to your guns! Good luck, mama! You can do it!
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Old 08-06-2010, 03:40 PM   #4
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Re: How old to look for something?

He can do it. He just doesn't want to. DD is 2.5 and if I tell her to get soemthing, and specifically where it is, she can do it. Or liek you said, if I tell her look ___, she can do that. But there are times where she suddenly goes deaf and doesn't help at all. That's when I tell her we need to go to the Dr to check her ears because she obviously can't hear well. She magically can hear again after that
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Old 08-06-2010, 03:52 PM   #5
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Re: How old to look for something?

Totally old enough to look for it. I bet if there was a consequence for a lost book....it would turn up super quick.

This just happened here recently. DD(5years): "But mom, I already looked EVERYWHERE, can't you find it?" Me: "It's not my repsonsibility. You'll have to give up all privileges until it's found, or until you earn the money to pay the library for the book"
I think it turned up about 5 minutes later........
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Old 08-06-2010, 04:09 PM   #6
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Re: How old to look for something?

Maybe by 'think it through' he's just trying to remember where he put it? You know how we adults lose our keys and the thought process is to go back and retrace our steps. Maybe he's trying to do the same thing mentally?
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Old 08-06-2010, 04:14 PM   #7
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Re: How old to look for something?

He is plenty old enough. My oldest dd used to throw the remote to our tv away when she was just over a yr. We would ask her where it was and she would even remember which trash she put it in. My youngest dd 11m has a lovey (baby doll) if we hide it and ask here where is baby she will crawl around and look for it. When she finds it she squeels with excitement and claps.
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Old 08-06-2010, 04:34 PM   #8
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Re: How old to look for something?

Well right now I've told him he has until 6pm to find it otherwise he's going to bed. He can look again tomorrow and if he don't find it then at 6pm he's going to bed again. We'll keep this up until he finds it. *sigh*
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Old 08-06-2010, 04:38 PM   #9
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Re: How old to look for something?

Stick to your guns, if he doesn't help look, don't give in or he'll be worse next time and you'll never get any co operation.
I usually put a consequence on lack of help with something that they need to do, works wonders.
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Old 08-06-2010, 04:42 PM   #10
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Re: How old to look for something?

DD is not quite 2.5 yrs and will go find anything when asked, as long as she is in a mood where she wants to cooperate. It sounds like your son may just not want to help look... I agree with trying to find something to motivate him, and stick to your guns and don't let him get away with it
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