UPDATED- Please help my baby wont breast feed and midwife says to give up :(

[mommaagain]

Originally Posted by Lanasmom That is all I have, if I think of anything else I will post back. Also do lots of skin to skin with him. I know its frustrating, but you're doing great mama!

YES! Skin to skin is great!!!! Even when you are not feeding. Maybe something like a Moby wrap to keep him close. You can wrap him up, then put a button down shirt on over it. Good luck mama!

[tamarag]

Originally Posted by mommaagain Oh, I'm so sorry your are having a hard time. Breastfeeding should be enjoyable. It can be heartbreaking when things go so wrong. I'll pass along all the knowledge I have learned in 10 yrs as an OB/Nursery/L&D RN and LC (not IBCLC). Rally your supporters and be committed to giving it another shot. First, it seems like you are not getting good help or advice. You can breastfeed with inverted nipples. Do they come out with the shield? when you pump? or when stimulated? Then you can likely breastfeed. First things first. He needs to eat. Major weight loss is concerning, esp. if he was not full term. Ditch the bottles. They are especially confusing for a baby with latching issues. Feed with a dropper, teaspoon, plastic medicine cup, or cup feeder. Doesn't have to be fancy. Boost your supply. There are many things that can help. I use Mothers Milk tea, but check with a local IBCLC for safety and other things that may help. Lots of mom's here swear oatmeal helps. I haven't tried it myself, but it's definitely safe. Be sure you are keeping up on your fluids. Up the pumping. 4 times a day is definitely not enough for a full milk supply. Breastfeeding is all about supply and demand. You should be copying baby's feeds, every 2-3 hours, and try for once at night. Your hormones are highest at night, so this is great for your supply. Are you pumping with a hospital grade double electric pump? If you are going to put all this work into pumping, rent the best pump you can find. Do the flanges, or horn shaped parts of the breast pump fit you properly? Nipples are like snowflakes, no two are the same. Properly fitted flanges will make a world of difference in how much milk you get out. Pump at least 10-15 min, 20 is a lot, more than that is overkill. A shield diminishes the contact to the breast, so even if baby nurses with it, pump for a few minutes after to make up for it. Use warm a warm compress for a few minutes before you pump. You can also put the warm water to your breasts in the shower. Or take a big basin of warm water and bend over and soak the girls for a few minutes. This will help with the let down, get the milk flowing, and help with the engorgement, or the plugged ducts you might have. Also, bend over and do a little massage to the breasts, and stimulate the nipples by hand yourself. Your hubby may be glad to help with this (hey, there has to be some fun in this) Kittens knead when they eat, so do human babies. It's all part of the let down process. Latching...is he possibly tongue tied? Can he stick his tongue out? Does that little bit of tissue that attaches the tongue to the floor of the mouth come all the way to the tip of the tongue? A tongue tie can be snipped by a qualified MD and WILL help with latching. How does he suck? Does he put his tongue up to the roof of his mouth and push out the nipple? You can do suck training. Wash your hands, clip your finger nails and let him suck on your upside down pinky finger. If he is not sucking properly, he can figure it out on you finger. You will know for sure when he gets a regular, rhythmic suck going. This will cut down on some of the frustration at the breast. More latching...Try when he's not starved. Try when he's half full, or sleepy. He won't fight it so much. Do the suck training, and then offer the breast. If he won't go, offer with the shield. Work up to taking the shield off part way through the feeding. The nipple should be pulled out at that point and you may be able to pop him right back on the breast. Pain...you're probably going to have some for a couple weeks with inverted nipples. They have a lot more stretching to do when a baby nurses than an everted nipple. It will go away (and your nipples will no longer be inverted!) You should not have bruising, blistered, cracked or bleeding nipples. If baby is latching well, he's covering the areola and the nipple ends up in the back of his mouth. Your midwife should have at least shown you that. Supplementing...it needs to be done until he's nursing well, or you can get your supply up enough to fully feed breast milk. Nurse first, or give breast milk first, then just enough formula to keep him happy. You can nurse and have someone else supplement while you pump, if you would like. I suggest supplementing at the breast. With my twins, I would latch them on and used a curved tip plastic dropper to supplement them while they ate. As soon as the baby stopped sucking, I would squeeze a couple drops of formula or breast milk into the corner of their mouth. They would suck a bit more and I would repeat. It's far less time consuming to supplement at the breast, AND it provides additional stimulation to the breast, so good for your supply. You could always use a supplemental nurser for the same purpose. That's all I can think of at the moment. Search for some form of breastfeeding support in your area. Is there a clinic nearby? Or a support group? The medela website has a ton of good information as well as the LLL site. I hope some of this information is helpful. My heart goes out to you. Best of luck.

Forgot to mention this. DS was "syringe fed" for the first 3 weeks of his life! You can do this mama!

[cupcakewright]

I didn't read all the advice but the LLL is not what you need at this point you need a International Board Certified Lactation Consultants. It will cost but less then formula in the long run.

Also pumping every 2-3 hours, like others have said.

I would go buy some breastflow bottles, they are most like the breast and will help you switch back and forth easier.

Also bottle feed like this,
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/pumping/bottle-feeding.html
so he doesn't get used to it just pouring in and yes buy or make a Supplemental Nursing system, so that he can be at the breast and still get food.


YOu can nurse your baby, but it is going to take the right resources and tons of fortitude.

I agree also check to see if baby is tongue tied, the Lactation consultant can help you with that.

Here is more on that...

http://www.breastfeedingbasics.com/h...gue_tied.shtml

Everyone here wants you to succeed so come back often for support and get help today!

[cupcakewright]

ok, Germany is goign to be a hard one but here is a link with an email to a consultant in Germany

http://www.breastfeeding.com/directo...s/germany.html

Maybe she can help you

[2+2macht4]

I am using medela bottles especially for breast fed babies.

As far as the latch/sucking issue at the hospital they said he has a sucking issue and t is seen even when he takes a bottle. I go to the pediatrician for his first visit in about 2 weeks, perhaps he can offer insight as well if its a tounge issue. They did not specify, just said he has sucking issues.

[2+2macht4]

Oh I forgot to ask when counting the time between pumping do you count from the beginning or end of the last pump? And how do you coincide that with breast feeding?

I got him to latch for a bit today on one side and he got some milk, but still needed the same amount of pumped afterwards.

[jesshb]

mama. I don't have anything new to add, but I agree with the pumping more frequently...every 2 to 2.5 hours around the clock with possibly a break in the wee hours of the morning. 5x in 24 hours isn't enough during the newborn stage.

[jesshb]

Originally Posted by Serenajean1 Oh I forgot to ask when counting the time between pumping do you count from the beginning or end of the last pump? And how do you coincide that with breast feeding? I got him to latch for a bit today on one side and he got some milk, but still needed the same amount of pumped afterwards.

Beginning to beginning....same as w/nursing.

I never pumped full time so I will let another mama chime in w/the coordination with breastfeeding.

[Lanasmom]

Mama, can you get an appt with the pedi before 2 weeks. If he had a sucking issue in the hospital its possible he has tounge tie which I would think needs to be corrected sooner rather than later.

[Datamum]

There's been some excellent advice here, I just want to add the SNS is a wonderful thing, it will really help boost your supply and you can feel good about feeding your sweet little baby.