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Old 03-31-2011, 09:00 AM   #31
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Re: Does anyone not enjoy BF?

I dont love it but it's mostly bc I can't give enough attention to my 4 year old. I'm always saying, let me feed brother and then I'll... I really hate that. I figure once we're at a year he'll be eating mostly solids and less bm and I won't have to make sure I don't miss any feedings, kwim?

To me, with both kids, a year is such a short time for me to sacrifice my body and freedom for their health, development, and emotional wellbeing.

I do get jealous of bottle feeding mamas bc I want freedom too.

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Old 03-31-2011, 09:06 AM   #32
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Re: Does anyone not enjoy BF?

I am ready to deliver #3 and am not excited about breastfeeding. My DS was almost 9 lbs. and as the nurse put it "he's big and strong he's eating like a barracuda". He was a big strong baby, bearing weight on his legs on day one, and his suck reflex KILLED me. I was blistered, chapped, bleeding, etc. and the lactation consultants said "you're doing it right, it will just take time to get used to it". My sister's BF experiences were similar, maybe we just have sensitive boobs, lol. I was miserable for 6 months and finally quit. He immediately began having multiple ear infections and I felt awful. With DD, it was almost as painful, but I only made it to 4 months, because of my own health (was sent to lots of doctors, they thought I had Lupus and I needed huge amounts of sleep to function, so DH did formula at night). She did not have the ear infections, and was a very happy formula baby. This time around, it's a big deal financially for me to be able to BF. We qualify for WIC, but they don't give you nearly the amount of formula you need. I am glad to hear other mamas say that formula is not poison, because I have basically been told that by some. My children are wonderful, well-adjusted and healthy. Yes, I want to give this baby a good start and I am determined to make it to one year, but if it doesn't work out, that's the way it is. Thanks for bringing this up! And good luck!
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Old 03-31-2011, 09:19 AM   #33
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Re: Does anyone not enjoy BF?

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Well I don't think this was called for. Someone can say they don't like some thing or not without it being thrown in their face. There's lots of things people don't enjoy but have to do cause it's their job but they can still complain about it.
I agree. Not enjoying it doesn't make any of us bad moms or love our kids any less. Breastfeeding isn't a emotionally detached experience.. or at least it shouldn't be. It's not healthy to pretend your feelings aren't important or valid. Sometimes acknowledging and voicing them is all that's needed. No I don't whistle dixie while I wash dishes or change diapers either. Even if I did, it wouldn't give me extra mommy brownie points. I'm glad I have places to go to share my experiences with other moms and let off a little emotional steam from time to time knowing I'm probably in good company. Being able to get it off my chest and move on is what makes me a good parent.
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Old 03-31-2011, 10:01 AM   #34
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Re: Does anyone not enjoy BF?

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... for now at least I can say I was able to for however long I do BF.
Good for you! And congrats on continuing to give it the college try. I think a 12-week trial period is a good amount of time to see if breastfeeding works for you and your family. Just please don't consider yourself a failure. You absolutely are an accomplished woman and loving mother.

I'm probably ranting at this point, but reading some of the posts in this thread from moms who are putting off children or dreading their babies' first year just saddens me somewhat. If breastfeeding support has gotten to a level where women feel like bad moms if they can't breastfeed, that is not support. It's bullying. Support comes from a community where members help to educate you and trust your judgment for your individual situation. If women are cowed (heh) into feeding their babies one particular way when it's uncomfortable for them, it seems to me there's a societal influence that's just downright disrespectful. I quite honestly do not see the difference between that and living in a culture where breastfeeding is seen as gross and deserving shunning.

Thanks for letting me get that off my (thoroughly sucked dry, by my choice) chest, ladies!
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Old 03-31-2011, 12:09 PM   #35
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Re: Does anyone not enjoy BF?

My first six weeks were torture due to my daughter's very small mouth/mild tongue tie = very painful latch plus some plugged ducts. I remember screaming when she would latch the first week - I truly felt like my niplles were being sliced with cut glass. Plus, she wasn't getting enough milk so the pediatrician made me feel like crap about her weight loss/slow gain.

Then it was wonderful, and I loved it for months.

Now, at 10 months, I'm so weary of pumping at work, and my daughter is turning into a little monkey when she's awake, and she's a very demanding night nurser. I am looking forward to no longer pumping, and then moving on to night weaning. I would like to continue to nurse her to sleep for many more months, but everything else can just go. I think it's absolutely normal to have mixed feelings about nursing.

I come here to get reinspired when I'm furstrated with nursing because I think the benefits of breastmilk are very significant - but formula is now much healthier than the crap they used to call formula, and if nursing is interfering with how you feel about life, then that is a legitimate reaction and there are alternatives!
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Old 03-31-2011, 12:21 PM   #36
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Re: Does anyone not enjoy BF?

I didint love it with dd. She was tongue tied and I ep for 6 months and we switched to formula. I felt so horribly about quitting and regretted it every day. I got really upset when I thought about quitting. So with DS I was very excited to bf. It was something I was anxious for. I do enjoy it but now that he's 14 months I have days I just want to quit. I know he's not ready. Looking back now i never had this bond with my dd. Were close but it wasn't the same with bottles.

What kept me going was just being proud of myself for doing it so long. I went back to work 6 week pp from a c/s and pumped every break and lunch. I hated that part.

Everyone who is doing it whether or not they like it should be proud!!
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Old 03-31-2011, 05:13 PM   #37
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Re: Does anyone not enjoy BF?

I didn't love every minute of BFing DS, especially as I was losing my supply once I got pregnant. It was still worth it and I'm still doing it for this next LO, there's no good reason for me not too. I don't love every single moment of being a parent, but I also don't dwell on those moments. I choose to focus on the rewarding things, and I think that applies to BFing as well.
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Old 03-31-2011, 07:10 PM   #38
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Re: Does anyone not enjoy BF?

I didn't like it at first - had a lot of troubles - but as DD gets older and things have gotten so much easier I find that I love it. I was planning to wean at 1, but dd just had her birthday last week and I can't imagine weaning her just yet. She's SO active that it's the only time I get to snuggle her But I'm not doing it as often now (only 3x per day) and we don't seem to have troubles anymore so that's probably why I like it so much now when I didn't before
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Old 03-31-2011, 07:31 PM   #39
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Re: Does anyone not enjoy BF?

I hated it with a screaming passion. I finally quit when I realized I was starting to resent my son. I figured formula was better than resentment and didn't bother even trying with my daughter.
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Old 03-31-2011, 08:36 PM   #40
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Re: Does anyone not enjoy BF?

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I hated it with a screaming passion. I finally quit when I realized I was starting to resent my son. I figured formula was better than resentment and didn't bother even trying with my daughter.
I definitely agree with the bolded. So sorry it was so hard on you mama.
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