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Old 04-18-2011, 01:10 PM   #1
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How do you night-wean w/o CIO??

DH and I are beyond tired.....

our 12 month old does not STTN. Not even close. He wakes up every 3 hours or so from the time he goes to bed (around 7:30) until he gets up around 7-8 am.

We don't co-sleep/bedshare.... he's left to the wolves in his own crib, in his own room.

When he wakes, he just wants to nurse, then fall back asleep. And no, I know what you're thinking.... he doesn't nurse to sleep. He is drowsy but fully awake when I put him in the crib, and then he rolls over, grabs his lovey and starts sucking his thumb as I walk out. I don't have to sneak out, etc. because he isn't asleep yet anyway.

But here's the thing.... NOTHING besides nursing works. Not rocking, swaying, patting his back/belly, nothing. He will scream bloody murder until he gets to nurse.... especially if Daddy comes in to try to comfort him. And DH just doesn't have the patience to deal w/ this.... he has a high-stress job and he literally needs the sleep.... so it's easier for me to just get up when he starts to fuss and nurse him for 5 minutes, then go back to bed. But I'd really like to STTN myself, or at least get up only once per night. And I don't want to CIO and neither does DH.

Anyone? Anyone? Bueller..... Bueller.....?

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Old 04-18-2011, 02:31 PM   #2
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Re: How do you night-wean w/o CIO??

we cosleep, and DS was older (20ish m) when I night weaned, but I told him milk was all gone, and we could snuggle instead. He knows all gone, and looked bummed, but accepted it.

I have no good advice for young-ins
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Old 04-18-2011, 02:39 PM   #3
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Re: How do you night-wean w/o CIO??

Maybe I should just suck it up and deal, right? I just read the thread about stupid things non-parents say, and all I keep thinking about is.... I feel like I can't even complain about being tired, because I'm the one 1) who chose to have kids, much less 3, and 2) who is choosing NOT to CIO. It really sucks when you feel like complaining and you know that everyone will judge you if you do!
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Old 04-18-2011, 02:46 PM   #4
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Re: How do you night-wean w/o CIO??

You could try cosleeping, if that's not an option you can limit the time that he gets to nurse. My son stuck to that every 3 hour thing for a long time. He finally fully night-weaned at 27 months.

I was able to stave him off sometimes by telling him that the booboos were still sleeping, that he needed to go back to sleep for a while.

You're not alone in wanting that full night of sleep.
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Old 04-18-2011, 03:07 PM   #5
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Re: How do you night-wean w/o CIO??

Will he take a bottle at all? I have a friend who weaned her daughter at night by giving her water in her bottle, after a few days she says her daughter stopped waking up, I guess she couldnt be bothered to wake up for just water. Not sure if you want to go that route or not, I have no advice, my baby doesnt STTN either
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Old 04-18-2011, 03:18 PM   #6
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Re: How do you night-wean w/o CIO??

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kriket View Post
we cosleep, and DS was older (20ish m) when I night weaned, but I told him milk was all gone, and we could snuggle instead. He knows all gone, and looked bummed, but accepted it.

I have no good advice for young-ins
Similar situation in our house. DS co-sleeps and was 22 months when I decided to night wean. We started a couple days before hand just telling him that soon there would be no more mama milk at night. We also talked about the sun and moon, light and dark, noisy and quiet and so on. Then when we put our plan into action those were the things we talked about when he woke and was asking to nurse. He was bummed but he understood when we looked outside and saw the moon and talked about how dark and quiet it was because everybody is sleeping. He eventually went back to sleep to. And it just got easier and easier from that first wakeup, on. I feel really good about waiting until DS was older to night wean because it felt good knowing that he had some understanding of what was going on.
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Old 04-18-2011, 03:25 PM   #7
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Our house gets really dry at night because of the air conditioning and fans (super hot here) so I finally realized DS was just waking up to nurse because he was thirsty. Could that be a possibility for your LO?

Now I tank him up with milk and a snack before bed and leave a sippy cup of water for him and he gets it himself. It took a couple of nights of suggesting the water and rocking him a minute but now he goes back to sleep by himself most of the time.
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Old 04-18-2011, 03:44 PM   #8
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Re: How do you night-wean w/o CIO??

I don't have a lot of experience with this because (thank goodness!) DS has been a pretty easy going sleeper. He was up every night at least one time to eat (he's 13mo) until VERY recently, like 2 weeks ago. The only thing that changed was he started to eat more food during the day. Seemed like once he started eating more during the day he started STTN.

So... maybe offer more food during the day? Is your DS already eating a lot?

Also, I'm sooo not the person to give advice about food. Food seems to be our only challege thus far. :/
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Old 04-18-2011, 04:06 PM   #9
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Re: How do you night-wean w/o CIO??

Don't be hard on yourself! And I think it's great that you are also thinking of your baby and their wants/needs as well as your own

I unfortunately don't really have any good advice because my son is almost 3 and just in the last few months have I cut him back at night. And in all honesty I haven't STTN myself for 4 years between my 4.5 y.o. and almost 3 y.o. [so not what you want to hear though right?? ]

I imagine back to when he was a year and doing what I am now, would have been a little tougher because of what he understood and what he understands.

He nursed as well every 3 hours [or typically 2-4x a night] up until about 2.5 years of age. I told him that he can nurse [X] number of times [2 for us] while the moon is out.
Now he sleeps from about 8pm until 4-5am and then asks to nurse.

It's working good, but we do co-sleep so while he got mad the first few times I was there to rub his back. But I realize not cosleeping makes it a bit harder as you'd have to get up and down.

You might want to check this book out. It's good I learned some stuff from it.
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/re.../dp/0912500549

Wishing you the best!
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Old 04-18-2011, 06:22 PM   #10
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Re: How do you night-wean w/o CIO??

Well, you know what we did. It was hard and took months but it worked. We have to keep our hand on her and stand over her crib for a while at night and she'll fall back asleep. I guess if patting his back doesn't work then what we did won't work. We bounced her up and down by pushing on her butt. Of course now that she is teething and up all night, it was all a waste. Sigh. Good luck.
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