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Old 04-21-2011, 01:53 PM   #1
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Dumb Nurse

So since I was at my 36 week appt., they apparently do some sort of informational interview with the nurse practitioner on staff. I've seen her before and I HATE HER.

So it basically is her treating me like I'm an idiot and don't know ANYTHING because it's my first baby. She asked me if I'd taken any classes and I've told her "No, we don't have time, but we've been reading a ton of books and researching online and talking to people (i.e. these boards.)" She looks at me like I'm crazy and says "Why don't you have time?!" I tell her we're in the middle of a remodel and every weekend is consumed with that. She seems to think that's not an excuse. What I don't tell her is that if I didn't focus all my attention on the remodel, I'd fall into a crazy depression because I basically live upstairs in my house and this remodel needs to be done before the baby comes.

So she goes on to lecture me and tell me that I shouldn't listen to my SIL who says the classes are BS and that I should pay attention to the research. She says that as a midwife blah blah blah. I stopped listening.

What drove me crazy is a) I don't need a lecture, thanks. And b) As a midwife shouldn't you be promoting choice and taking responsibility for your own education?

THEN what drove me even more crazy is that she asked if I was going to breastfeed (yes) and she made some comment like "Oh the breastfeeding stuff isn't as important as taking a class on childbirth." UM WHAT. I think the opposite! The childbirth classes don't always have the greatest information, and I don't need to sit around breathing with other women. I've done yoga for quite some time now, thanks. BUT breastfeeding is SO important and particular and often you need a lot of help. She said that women shouldn't feel guilty if they can't do it. Which I agree with, but I think a lot of women give up before they've really given it a shot.

So that's my vent. Basically, I hate being lectured. And I didn't like her "You're an idiot" attitude. I love my doctor but if in the future I have to see this lady, I will respectfully decline.

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Old 04-21-2011, 02:25 PM   #2
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Re: Dumb Nurse

o man. ppl can be so annoying. Hopefully you can avoid her in the future!
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Old 04-21-2011, 02:27 PM   #3
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Re: Dumb Nurse

Oh dear... I'm sorry you had to listen to that!!

I agree, I think you can learn a lot from reading, talking to other people (take what you need from this though and don't listen to horror stories), and doing your own research. I took two childbirth classes - one offered by the hospital where I worked and would be birthing, and a 12-week class on the Bradley Method. Although I can appreciate what I learned, neither class really prepared me for the actual experience. IMO, classes sort of teach you about the textbook childbirth experience and most moms would say their birth didn't turn out the way they were told it would. Labor is sort of going to happen no matter what. Not that it isn't hard and that there aren't things you can learn to prepare yourself, but breastfeeding is a whole different ball game. I think your NP is wrong about that too. Good support can be really important to successfully breastfeed.

Well, anyway... I hope your house remodel is over soon and sorry you've had to deal with that during your pregnancy. I'm sure it's going to be so nice when your baby is here, your house is done, and you can settle into the sweet life with your new LO.
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Old 04-21-2011, 02:32 PM   #4
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Re: Dumb Nurse

The nurse is certainly entitled to her opinion as are you. It wouldn't hurt to remind her of this if you see her again.
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Old 04-21-2011, 03:31 PM   #5
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Re: Dumb Nurse

Quote:
Originally Posted by Guzel View Post
The nurse is certainly entitled to her opinion as are you. It wouldn't hurt to remind her of this if you see her again.
Ha. Good point!

Yeah, I feel as if the classes are a sort of textbook approach. I really, honestly, think that reading about a variety of experiences (Ina May's book) is the best way to go. I got my textbook info down from the Dr. Sears book and my stories from Ina May. I don't know, I feel like you can know the mechanics, but everyone's story is different, and you can't be super prepared for it. I definitely don't feel nervous. Maybe a little anxious, but I think everyone does.

She also told me that it would be good for my husband because without the classes he won't know what to do. My husband knows me better than anyone in the world, and if he did what a lot of those classes told him to do, I would punch him in the face. He knows his job is to get me what I want, not be upset if I yell at him, and get rid of any nurses I hate.

Oh the breastfeeding thing irked me. She also asked me about vaccinations and when I mentioned delayed she got a little weird. She is new to the practice from Florida - she's going to have to get used to the Pacific NW crunchiness!
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Old 04-21-2011, 03:36 PM   #6
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Re: Dumb Nurse

sounds rude...ugh
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Old 04-22-2011, 06:08 AM   #7
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Re: Dumb Nurse

Oh!!! If it makes you feel any better we didn't go to classes either (this is our first). They kept asking if we would like to sign up for them and when we didn't they questioned why as if we didn't care! Well, your class starts at 6pm on weeknights - I work till 5pm then have to drive an HOUR there... sit around for 2-3 hours then not get home until way past my bedtime. I think it's better for me and the baby if I get some sleep. I have been reading books and talking to close friends/family too - my sister even said the classes are a waste of time.

Sorry your nurse was a crab - you will do great during childbirth and breastfeeding because you have the determination!
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Old 04-22-2011, 10:18 AM   #8
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Re: Dumb Nurse

I've never been to a childbirth class and this is my forth!
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Old 04-22-2011, 10:49 AM   #9
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Re: Dumb Nurse

DDC here.

I just wanted to throw out the fact that with my first we did childbirth prep classes and a breastfeeding class.

DH and I have had the discussion many times how very useful and informative the breastfeeding class was and how we feel it did contribute to establishing a successful nursing relationship with my son.

We also believe that the childbirth prep classes were dumb and pretty much a waste of time.

So, yeah. I guess that nurse can think I'm a big old dummy too ;-p
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Old 04-22-2011, 11:02 AM   #10
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Re: Dumb Nurse

Sorry you had to deal with that! DH & I took childbirth classes with our first, and I can honestly say they were completely worthless, basically promoting/preparing us for all the medical interventions that might come our way. So, we opted not to take them with our 2nd, and a rude nurse actually scolded me during a hard contraction(was on pitocin with no epidural at the time) telling me I should've taken the classes so I could better cope with the pain. Then with my 3rd I took natural childbirth classes through my mw, and they were good as was the Hypnobirthing I took with my 5th. That said, I think I've gleaned just as much if not more by reading both good birth books and doing research online than I did in any class.
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