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Old 04-28-2011, 02:33 PM   #1
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A-Mom & Mother's Day

So even as I write this I feel silly cause I really shouldn't care what others think....but well, I do.

We are in the fos/adopt process and are so excited as this will be our first child.

So as we are approaching Mother's Day I am a little unsure (OK maybe insecure) about it.. I have a wonderful hubby that wants to spoil me a bit that day and it feels a little weird to me cause it isn't like I have the baby bump or any little one in tow so I feel a little like a poser I guess..

Also, they honor the mom(and-to-be)s at church and he is all like you can go up there this year...and that seems even more weird...

Anyone else feel like this? What did you guys do, or plan to do? Am I just being silly?

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Old 04-28-2011, 02:51 PM   #2
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Re: A-Mom & Mother's Day

I probably would not go up there because it could be another year or two before you actually get to adopt a baby honestly, depending on where in the process you're at currently.

If I were in that situation I would just feel awkward. Maybe next year if/when you have an actual baby in your arms.
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Old 04-28-2011, 03:43 PM   #3
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Re: A-Mom & Mother's Day

I can see why you may feel awkward BUT adopting is a way of preparing for parenthood - it's like pregnancy in it's own way I suppose. I think it's up to you - I wouldn't be ashamed what-so-ever about walking up there or whatever it is. Just because you have no bump doesn't mean you don't have the bump mindset, but that's just my opinion. I haven't adopted a child, but we have thought about it and I actually was going to adopt on my own. My husband is adopted though - not that that's really relevant, and now I'm rambling....either way mama - you rock for adopting!
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Old 04-28-2011, 05:00 PM   #4
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Re: A-Mom & Mother's Day

I probably wouldn't go up or celebrate in a big way because it would feel a little odd to me, but I wouldn't think badly of somebody else if they did it.

Also? Some other people celebrating might not look pregnant or have a baby already either. It's usually a couple of months before you're noticeably pregnant and in my case, I didn't have a proper bump until I was six months along at least. My doctor was amazed... I had a regular chorus of ''I just don't know where he's hiding!''.
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Old 04-28-2011, 07:08 PM   #5
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Re: A-Mom & Mother's Day

I wouldn't go as adoption is a process, and if you don't have a child and just trying its not the same thing to many and most people just don't understand. Personally, I found mother's day really hard but it was also because the process was so long and hard for us. I hope your child finds you soon!
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Old 04-29-2011, 01:20 PM   #6
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Re: A-Mom & Mother's Day

If you are matched with a birth mom or have a referral for a child, then I would go up. If you're still working through the homestudy process or creating a profile, then I wouldn't.

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Old 05-02-2011, 10:22 AM   #7
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Re: A-Mom & Mother's Day

Do what you want. I think mother's day is a toughie. I was getting close to my daughter being born our first mother's day after starting the process, but I didn't do anything except send our e-mom some flowers. My sister did right me a fab card about everything she's learned as a mom and I cried, loved it, and kept it.

I'm not sure I would do a public thing, but just b/c the questions can get old. But you might want to suck up the attention from the hubby. You are probably doing a lot of new mom research (what diapers, bottles, sleeping situation, etc., etc.). That's work and it's nice when it's recognized. Plus when you get your baby you will miss the days of sleeping in, getting massages, watching movies, and not thinking about what's for breakfast. So I say enjoy that part of the day!
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Old 05-03-2011, 01:35 AM   #8
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Re: A-Mom & Mother's Day

Thanks guys, that is kinda what I was thinking....
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Old 05-03-2011, 10:31 AM   #9
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Re: A-Mom & Mother's Day

Since you haven't been matched yet, I wouldn't correlate where you are to pregnancy, more like still trying to conceive I'd wait at least until you have a match to celebrate Mother's Day.
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Old 05-03-2011, 11:48 AM   #10
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Re: A-Mom & Mother's Day

Quote:
Originally Posted by Evadiva View Post
Thanks guys, that is kinda what I was thinking....
Hang in there. It is really hard, but when baby comes, it will make that 1st mothers day and every other one after that all the more special. I kinda think every day is Mother's Day!
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