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Old 05-04-2011, 07:59 AM   #1
newmommy929
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Why does this always happen to me???

It may not be "that" big of a deal, but EVERY time that I have been pregnant there has been someone in my DH's family that has been. I don't know if this is selfish of me or not, but it really drives me crazy...can't I ever be pregnant alone and have the so to speak attention to myself? Good grief, after all that we have been through to get and stay pregnant, then someone else ends up pregnant so it's "no big deal".

First, it was me and his sister. I was FINALLY pregnant with my first after having 2 losses and then she had the balls to complain she was having another boy. With this pregnancy we were due 1 day apart, but my ODS came 4 weeks early and her's a week and a half after mine...

Then I was pregnant with my second...another little boy. It was at Christmas with his family that I found out his sister was pregnant AGAIN!!! Granted we were due like 4 months different, but still. It was here AGAIN...and she said she was "scared" to tell us....why, is that because you were such a snot before???? Guess I would feel like an idiot also. (I had kept it in for 2.5 years about how she so badly hurt my feelings by her saying that and then I finally and kindly said something to her).

Now, I surprisingly found out on Sunday evening that I am pregnant with my third...we weren't trying, but we weren't trying to prevent it either...just came sooner than when we thought...I hadn't gotten my period back yet and am still nursing my almost 13month old. So I honestly don't even know how far along I am. The midwives nurse said probably 6-7 weeks, but I when I lay down can feel my uterus at about my belly button. So I go in a little over a week to see how far a long I am. None the less...this time it is his cousin...granted I probably won't see here that much, but from the sounds of it on her FB page, we could be due pretty close together....

Ugh...ok, I am sorry that you all had to listen to this kinda stupid rant, but it is really frustrating....

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Old 05-04-2011, 08:26 AM   #2
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Re: Why does this always happen to me???

I have a crazy SIL who is due 5 days before me. I'm so upset about it. Mostly because everyone is thrilled because it's their second, and I'm terrified to say anything about my pregnancy since it's our 4th and we'll be getting negative comments about needing to find birth control instead of people being happy for us. Sigh. Anyways, I understand
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Old 05-04-2011, 08:48 AM   #3
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Hmm... That kinda stinks... I always wanted someone to be pregnant with. Maybe because dh's family all the kids are older and my lil dd always gets left out because none of the kids are her age. Oh and I dont have any friends with kids my daughters age either. Atleast not ones that I ever see. But my best friend is pregnant now I'm almost due and she still has till November but it's nice having someone to get to share my waaa stories with. Sorry I guess I just felt the opposite though almost both of my pregnancies...
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Old 05-04-2011, 10:40 AM   #4
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Re: Why does this always happen to me???

I know exactly how you feel. We have a hard time conceiving too and it's been 6 years since our last child. We were overjoyed to find out we were expecting again and shared with our families on New Year's Day. It's the 11th grandchild in 2011 on both sides, we thought that was pretty special and everyone was so excited! I have particular issues with my side of the family and for once was so happy that I and my new baby would be the focus of attention for a while. So in February my brother announces that his new girlfriend is pregnant...his 4th child, with 4 different mothers, she all ready has 4 other children and both of them rely heavily on state assistance. I am in NO WAY trying to say I am better than them, but for goodness sake...practice some self control! My dad and step mother have all ready made a fuss over them and I know all their energy will be put into helping them with gifts and attention while my little one is pushed aside. I'm just so angry!! Feels good to get that out, I've felt ridiculous and haven't said anything to anyone!
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Old 05-04-2011, 11:15 AM   #5
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Re: Why does this always happen to me???

I'm in the same boat as you . When I was pregnant with DS1, three of our close friends were also pregnant - one due two months before, one due a week after, and the other due two months after. With DS2, my husband's nephew and his wife were also pregnant - due two weeks after me. With this baby, they're pregnant with me again (due one day after me), and DH's cousin and his wife are also pregnant, due one month after me.

With each pregnancy, I feel like I've been pushed to the back burner, especially by DH's family. This one has been especially annoying. DH's cousin and his wife are expecting their first child (a girl), and this will be our third (and third boy), so I kind of feel like my pregnancy/baby aren't as special. I was even asked to plan her baby shower - which they wanted to do a week before my EDD! Once I pointed that out, they said "oh yeah, we forgot." Talk about making me feel great, LOL!
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Old 05-04-2011, 11:58 AM   #6
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Re: Why does this always happen to me???

I tend to be happy and excited that others are pregnant at the same time I am because that means there will be other babies/kids the same age as mine at family functions. Plus, there's someone to compare notes with about the pregnancy, etc. But that's just me. I do understand feeling like it's not as special though too when others are pregnant. I just focus on the other part of it.
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Old 05-04-2011, 11:59 AM   #7
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Re: Why does this always happen to me???

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Originally Posted by mama.timms View Post
With each pregnancy, I feel like I've been pushed to the back burner, especially by DH's family. This one has been especially annoying. DH's cousin and his wife are expecting their first child (a girl), and this will be our third (and third boy), so I kind of feel like my pregnancy/baby aren't as special. I was even asked to plan her baby shower - which they wanted to do a week before my EDD! Once I pointed that out, they said "oh yeah, we forgot." Talk about making me feel great, LOL!
This is just crazy! I'd be very annoyed and bothered by this!!
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Old 05-04-2011, 01:19 PM   #8
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Re: Why does this always happen to me???

I would feel the same way!
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Old 05-04-2011, 03:21 PM   #9
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Re: Why does this always happen to me???

I just love when people say "this must be the time to be pregnant - I know sooo many people other than you that are pregnant." Geesh, way to make a mama feel special and celebrate her baby, you know? Sorry you're frustrated.
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Old 05-04-2011, 03:51 PM   #10
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Re: Why does this always happen to me???

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Originally Posted by ho11yb View Post
I tend to be happy and excited that others are pregnant at the same time I am because that means there will be other babies/kids the same age as mine at family functions. Plus, there's someone to compare notes with about the pregnancy, etc. But that's just me. I do understand feeling like it's not as special though too when others are pregnant. I just focus on the other part of it.
This is how I feel too. Of course I have 2 kids and I have been the only one pregnant with both of them so maybe it's because I had my time so to speak. But I'm pregnant with #3 and my younger sister is about 5 weeks behind me pregnant with a set of twins (her 1st pregnancy). While it's not a great situation I'm still excited to know my kids will have cousins their ages. I'm hoping that we get news that some other cousins are on their way soon too.
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