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Old 05-11-2011, 05:30 PM   #1
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Licensing done!

Just waiting on the official paperwork in the mail, caseworker said it should be within the week or two at the most. They've had tons of placements too. Apparently we picked the largest agency in our area and are located near a county with an incredible number of foster kids.

So now I'm kinda freaking out about how we decide who we will take. We for sure want to adopt a little girl, I think the younger the better, but still want to foster too. How do you decide????? It's so hard!

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Old 05-11-2011, 09:30 PM   #2
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Re: Licensing done!

Yay!! That is so exciting. What ages are you going to accept? Will you do siblings? Just girls or?? I would love to keep up to date on how it goes for you as I am just a few steps behind you. Hope you get a placement soon, when you do come back and let us know how it is going!!
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Old 05-12-2011, 05:18 AM   #3
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Re: Licensing done!

That's the thing...we don't really know what's best! And I'm kinda one of those people who would say yes to every placement, even if it did not fit our criteria. How do you turn away a child in need?

We said 0 to 5, because we didn't want to displace our 6 year old and figured our 14 month old really wouldn't notice or mind. We for sure, need some girls up in this house...I'm totally outnumbered! 6 months pregnant with our fourth boy, but our boys would love more boys! Ah, see how hard this is???

We will be licensed for up to three kids, because my SS is not technically living here "full-time". We will take siblings, that's one of the reasons we wanted to license for the max.

As far as adopting a girl, I'm thinking the younger the better. I don't want to miss out on anything....maybe two or three. Or if we wait till my 14 month old is two, we could take a baby girl to adopt. I say that now and we may fall in love with a five year old girl who becomes adoptable and all of that goes out the window.

Also, if we took a sibling group, we wouldn't have to wait till my 14 month old is two for a baby. The whole two under two rule, is null and void with siblings. But like I REALLY need more babies right now.

See how hard this is? Just praying that God makes it perfectly clear who he wants us to take into our home and who he wants us to adopt...I just can't even begin to know how I will make decisions like that, especially when they have to be made quickly.
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Old 05-12-2011, 09:57 AM   #4
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Re: Licensing done!

I'm outnumbered since I'm the only girl with 5 boys including dh! My boys however DO NOT want anymore boys. They are all stuck on a sister so we just will not take any boys because with my luck, they'll become available for adoption and I'll have to say no since dh is only willing to adopt one. We will only take younger than our youngest so under 2.

Congrats! We can't choose what county/agency here. I am stuck with the one I'm in which is a bummer since it borders the two busiest in the state and I'd do it through one of them in a heartbeat if I could!
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Old 05-12-2011, 09:59 AM   #5
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We are so confused as well as who to accept. We want to adopt a sibling set of two and hope that somehow we'll either get to foster or adopt a baby as well. We originally were open to 0-7 and hoping for a boy somewhere in those three children. But last week our news featured a sibling set that has been waiting 6 years to be adopted. We totally fell in love and I think we're calling our caseworker today. The funny thing is they are both older (they only said the oldest's age, she's 10) and both girls.

My problem is I'm worried it will never feel wrong. I know doing respite care helped because we learned a few things that were "wrong" for us. Like four kids under four. Not my cup of tea, lol. But I'm also scared I won't be able to turn away anyone.
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Old 05-12-2011, 10:09 AM   #6
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I've said no twice to boys and felt terrible along with a girl who was too old! The first boy and girl I really couldn't take because they were too old (we don't currently have an available room, just ours which is okay for under 2) but I felt horrible about the second one. He wasn't even in care yet though and it was just possible they needed me in case he did. So that could have fallen through too. If I didn't already have four, all boys and dh is only agreeing to adopt ONE, I'd be so much more flexible and what I'd take! I know by the way my boys are that they would do badly with a child in the middle of their ages. They all do awesome with babies and young toddlers as does dh so I know that's just what we can take right now. I'm hoping some day when I've got some kids out of the house we can do it again and take a bigger variety of ages and sibling sets.
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Old 05-12-2011, 11:04 AM   #7
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Great news..I've heard so many people say you just know when it's right so here's hoping that's the case for you! GL and glad you've finished all the paperwork stuff and approved! GL!
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Old 05-12-2011, 12:40 PM   #8
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Re: Licensing done!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mama2ManyBoyz View Post
That's the thing...we don't really know what's best! And I'm kinda one of those people who would say yes to every placement, even if it did not fit our criteria. How do you turn away a child in need?

We said 0 to 5, because we didn't want to displace our 6 year old and figured our 14 month old really wouldn't notice or mind. We for sure, need some girls up in this house...I'm totally outnumbered! 6 months pregnant with our fourth boy, but our boys would love more boys! Ah, see how hard this is???

We will be licensed for up to three kids, because my SS is not technically living here "full-time". We will take siblings, that's one of the reasons we wanted to license for the max.

As far as adopting a girl, I'm thinking the younger the better. I don't want to miss out on anything....maybe two or three. Or if we wait till my 14 month old is two, we could take a baby girl to adopt. I say that now and we may fall in love with a five year old girl who becomes adoptable and all of that goes out the window.

Also, if we took a sibling group, we wouldn't have to wait till my 14 month old is two for a baby. The whole two under two rule, is null and void with siblings. But like I REALLY need more babies right now.

See how hard this is? Just praying that God makes it perfectly clear who he wants us to take into our home and who he wants us to adopt...I just can't even begin to know how I will make decisions like that, especially when they have to be made quickly.
this and this. as much as i seriously hate to admit this, i think i will have to trust my husband on this. so hard for me!
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Old 05-14-2011, 02:29 PM   #9
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Re: Licensing done!

Hows it going? Any calls at all?
I understand your reasoning on ages and all. I don't want my youngest to be displaced either. He is four so we requested a girl newborn to 3 1/2 at oldest. Would love to take a sibling set of girls.. We can only take two.
Did they tell you the usual wait time? Is your county a pretty large one with many placements or is it a smaller county? Ours is pretty small but we have many larger Counties around us and they said as long as we were willing to drive to take the child to visitation and such we could get another counties placement..
Well, update when ya can... lol I think I would be going bonkers once I know we are licensed and just have to wait for the call!! I hope you hear from them soon and it is the perfect placement... We are just a few short steps behind you.. finished our classes today! YAY
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Old 05-14-2011, 02:47 PM   #10
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Re: Licensing done!

No calls yet, we can't technically take a placement until we get the license in the mail, but that should be any day now. She did say that she can issue an immediate permit if she needs to, but won't unless it's necessary...lots of paperwork.

Our agency was on call last week...a crazy week too with lots of kiddos! So I'm thinking we have about three weeks before they would get calls and we would get a placement. Although, she did say that the other agencies often call her because they don't have enough foster homes to fulfill the placement.

So I suppose it could be anytime, but more than likely it will be around three weeks or so. The more I think about it, the more I'm wanting a two or three year old girls. We said 0 to 5.
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