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Old 05-19-2011, 04:39 PM   #21
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Re: Are we too protective/strict?

Thanks ladies! I knew we were making the right decision for our children, but almost everyone we know IRL thinks we're being unreasonable.

Oh, and DH is definitely in agreement. He feels just as strongly as I do about protecting our boys from certain things/people. He actually got upset last weekend because we went to a birthday party, and almost all the adults were smoking cigarettes while playing with the kids - you couldn't escape the smoke and it was starting to bother me, so we ended up leaving.

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Old 05-19-2011, 04:56 PM   #22
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Re: Are we too protective/strict?

No mama, you're not. You're also not trying to keep them from their grandparents, you're trying to keep them from being exposed to their grandparents' choices. BIG difference. If they aren't willing to come see the kids at your house, meet at a park, etc. then they are keeping themselves from seeing the kids. You set forth a set of (very acceptable imo) rules that they need to follow and respect regarding the safety of your children, and if they choose not to abide by those, the repercussions are no one's fault but their own.

While some things can be seen as being over protective, I definitely wouldn't put those in that category. AN AXE ON THE FLOOR? Come on! Feces? EW. And the pot issue is beyond acceptable by ANY means. If I was their neighbor, and I saw children going into a house I knew was often and heavily trafficked for drug use, I would call CPS in a heartbeat, kwim? Excluding the the fact her being stoned around them isn't safe, excluding that the smoke from it isn't safe as 2nd hand or 3rd hand for them, excluding all of that, at the very least, the cops and cps possibility would be enough for me to not send them over.

You're doing the right things mama I hope they wise up and decide to act properly and are able to see the kids more often.
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Old 05-19-2011, 04:56 PM   #23
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Re: Are we too protective/strict?

No mama, you're not. You're also not trying to keep them from their grandparents, you're trying to keep them from being exposed to their grandparents' choices. BIG difference. If they aren't willing to come see the kids at your house, meet at a park, etc. then they are keeping themselves from seeing the kids. You set forth a set of (very acceptable imo) rules that they need to follow and respect regarding the safety of your children, and if they choose not to abide by those, the repercussions are no one's fault but their own.

While some things can be seen as being over protective, I definitely wouldn't put those in that category. AN AXE ON THE FLOOR? Come on! Feces? EW. And the pot issue is beyond acceptable by ANY means. If I was their neighbor, and I saw children going into a house I knew was often and heavily trafficked for drug use, I would call CPS in a heartbeat, kwim? Excluding the the fact her being stoned around them isn't safe, excluding that the smoke from it isn't safe as 2nd hand or 3rd hand for them, excluding all of that, at the very least, the cops and cps possibility would be enough for me to not send them over.

You're doing the right things mama I hope they wise up and decide to act properly and are able to see the kids more often.
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Old 05-19-2011, 05:36 PM   #24
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Yikes;, no you aren't to protective. They are lucky you let them see the kids at al

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Old 05-19-2011, 05:51 PM   #25
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Re: Are we too protective/strict?

You're in the right. They have issues and your kids should not have to deal with those issues.
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Old 05-19-2011, 05:54 PM   #26
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Re: Are we too protective/strict?

Uh... yeah... My LO wouldn't be going to their houses either. Don't let them guilt you, mama... they're just mad that you are a way better parent than they ever could be.
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Old 05-19-2011, 05:59 PM   #27
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Re: Are we too protective/strict?

We do the same thing with my husbands family. They are only allowed to see them if they come over to our house. We told them before we even had them. We don't care what they have to say because you have to protect your children. There is nothing wrong with that!
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Old 05-19-2011, 06:12 PM   #28
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Re: Are we too protective/strict?

No way, you're not overprotective at all, at least not in this case. No way would I bring my son into those kind of environments. I wouldn't even let my mother hold my son if she were a pothead, because of the 3rd hand smoke.
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Old 05-20-2011, 04:42 AM   #29
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Re: Are we too protective/strict?

Quote:
Originally Posted by 4littlenorskes View Post
NOPE!

And I see nothing wrong with this statement: We just ask that if/when they want to see their grandchildren, they come to our house - where it's safe, clean, and free from drugs/druggies.
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Old 05-20-2011, 05:39 AM   #30
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Re: Are we too protective/strict?

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