Those who are against letting DC CIO

[momof2inohio]

Fairly quickly, during the day and the night. At night I sing the Rock A-Bye Baby song to myself (maybe he can hear me? LOL don't know why). But I start singing it when I first hear him in the middle of the night. Sometimes he falls back asleep, sometimes not and so I go get him. This is only if he's doing that mumbling kind of cry, KWIM? If it's louder than that mumble, then I get up just fast enough that my tired head doesn't get dizzy! LOL

I frequent another mommy board and just cannot believe how some of these woman are. The subject line on a post not too long ago said, I made it 20 minutes! I'm thinking, what, You made it 20 minutes...holding your breath...watching a video on repeat again?? No (is it wrong of me to talk about another message board?) No, she was so proud that she didn't respond to her crying, I think she even used the word gagging, baby left behind a closed door in a crib. 20 minutes her poor daughter cried for her mom and was ignored. The mom was just thrilled the baby went to sleep. I couldn't believe it. Reading posts like that make me want to leave the board, but I've been chatting with those woman since very early in my pregnancy.

[Namaste]

I don't let her CIO, but I do let her calm herself down, kwim? If I put her down for a nap and she's overtired and crying, then I give it a couple of mintues. We all can tell by the sound of our children if they are calming themselves or getting more upset.

[Bare Bottom Gear]

Again....what's CIO?

[davechan2003]

SAHMTo2 - CIO is crying it out.

Originally Posted by kimb96 Cherish every minute of it. Before you know it he will be toddling around and won't want to be held anymore. Two nights ago, ds woke in the middle of the night and cried. I got him out of bed and carried him to the rocking chair where he immeciately fell asleep in my arms. I held and rocked him for nearly an hour. He's 25 months old now and rarely wants to be held or cuddled and I miss those days.

Isn't this the truth! That brought tears to my eyes!!

I remember a friend once said to me, weeks after she'd visited us for a week when ds was young, "have you learned to let him cry yet?" Ds wasn't much of a cryer anyway, but when he did, I went to him right away. I just thought that was normal! I couldn't imagine not responding to his crying! Another friend of mine has a 7 month old and ever since he was tiny she's been letting him CIO for sleeping. Breaks my heart! She would say, "oh, he's down to only crying for 20 minutes to get to sleep" GULP!!! That poor baby! He wasn't even 2 months old when she said this to me! I understand the frustration of having a fussy baby and sometimes had to just put Anna down for a minute so I didn't throw her out the window (not literally, ykwim!), and even then I'd set the microwave timer for 5 minutes and rarely made it to 5 minutes.

So now to actually answer your question. I get to her as soon as is possible if it's not a desparate cry. If I'm in the middle of something I'll usually finish the task at hand. But I can't bear to hear her cry for very long. Even if all she needs is a cuddle, she gets it!

[raceNzanesmom]

CIO= cry it out, letting baby cry instead of tending to their needs

I don't let my babies cry except as has been said- gotta pee sometimes. Once they're older I'll let a little self soothing cry go, but only 2-4 minutes.

At 12 weeks I respond as immediate as possible. A 12 w/o can not be spoiled. If he quits crying when he's picked up it's because that's what he needed. How would dh like it if you shut the door and ignored him when he was talking?? That's all a baby is doing when they cry- trying to express themselves.

[mommy2zander]

I used to bring ds with me latched on & nursing while I went potty if need be!! I still tend to him quickly, but now that he's 2 (it's crazy, he's actually 2, not almost 2, really 2!! But anyway) I am able to let him walk with me & stand by me while I potty & he can still latch on/nurse if he needs too! but since he can walk, he can come to me as well as me going to him!!

If he is tired & fussing, I try to get to him as quickly as possible... I don't consider him spoiled, even at 2! I just consider his needs met!

Originally Posted by mamallama If you do what is in your heart, you should never have to doubt that you did the right thing.

I also think this is great advice!! Feel free to pm me if you need an ear or some gentle parenting support!!

[lindsayncadence]

Cadence was never much of a crier so i go to her whenever she cries ifs shes throwing a fit i kinda just sit beside her and let her throw it LOL but i dont look at her lol......I go to her about 98% when she cries unless im busy

"My Grandma, on the other hand, just smiles and says "of course, that's the right thing to do!". Whether she believes that, or after 25+ grandkids she's learned to smile and shut up, I don't know. But I appreciate it!"

my mom dont say anything to me but my gramma is the same way she always says im a great mom and she thinks my cloth diapers are soo much different (she had ten kids lol so they pry are wayyyy different) and i showed her my slings and she loves them......... i just love grandmas!!! i truly think mine likes how i raise dd though...i think she would tell me if she thought i should do something different....

[Five Green Beans]

Originally Posted by GavinsMommy How long do you let your babes cry/fuss before you tend to them or pick them up?

I cant stand to let my little one cry I always tend to her right away (if I can) or have some one else tend to her if I cant.

[woolfulcomforts]

Originally Posted by GavinsMommy see I knew I wasn't crazy, I get no support from DH & Mum, they say "you're gonna have to let him fuss a little or you will always be tied down" or Mum says "he needs to develop his lungs or that is why he still has a goopy eye (tear duct not open) cause you don't let him cry" COME ON! I cannot stand to let him cry I am SORRY it breaks my heart, I want him to know Mommy will always be there, I too, go right away, it only takes as long as it takes me to get to him (unless of course in potty or trying to pop in a load of laundry somethin like that lol) and even so I will calm him down then go back to what I was doing, or I get him settled close where he can see me... I wear him when possible too, and he's only 12 weeks old (well on thurs) so it's not like I have a 3 year old attached to my hip kwim?

he is only 12 weeks...

man i never let a baby cry.. now Markie , when he was 2.5 yo he cried when i held him and cried when i didnt. but the option of me holding him was there. it was just terrible twos..
but a 4 mo old baby..

and the lungs thing...come on that is just silly..

your doing great following what is natural to you..

[jennyofthemoon]

When they're little, they are basically strapped to me all the time so they don't have a lot of opportunity to cry. But if they do, they'd only cry for as long as it took me to get to them. I HATE hearing babies cry. And I don't ingnore adults who are crying--they obviously need something. Just cuz a baby can't talk doesnt mean they don't need soemthing too.

All of my family and dh's family and well, just about everyone we know really dislikes how I am with babies.I will agree that I am a bit over the top about NOT letting my babes cry, but I have to do what I feel is right.

Now, once they hit 3 and are crying becausre I won't let them have soda...well, that is a WHOLE different story!!!