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Old 06-14-2011, 10:04 PM   #1
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Tandem

Ok so I am 37 weeks preggo and I am nursing a 20, almost 21 month old girl...she nurses once for nap for about 10 minutes then again before bed for 20 or so minutes. She plays at the breast but still just loves nursing. My original idea of weaning before the next LO arrives is obviously not happening. Nope!
So I am planning on tandem breastfeeding. My midwife gave me a few suggestions. One being to always nurse the NB first of course, especially for the colostrum. She said if I am engorged to have my toddler relieve the fullness so the baby can latch on better...

I was just wondering if anyone could share their personal advice on the matter. Any tips or tricks? Things I oughtta know? I would like to wean my toddler by around age 2 unless she self weans before then.

Thanks!

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Old 06-14-2011, 10:26 PM   #2
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Re: Tandem

The MW gave you one of the best tips of any! Let the toddler nurse first if the engorgement is too much for baby to latch. It made nursing much easier for me than with my others that weren't tandemed
I tandemed my #3 with #4, and I expect I'll be tandeming #4 with #5. I never worried about who nursed first, the baby always nursed way more than the older anyways.
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Old 06-14-2011, 10:32 PM   #3
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Re: Tandem

Sounds like your first is almost weaned She might get more interested in nursing when the little one arrives. I always just let my new one nurse first. I didn't get as engorged the second time around. Thank goodness! I would definatley begin to talk with your first how she will have to take turns once the baby gets here. My son found it difficult at first to share but he was nursing on demand 6-10 a day plus nursing to bed. That was the toughest part, bedtime. Be sure your partner is on the same page and willing to help with the bedtime routine.
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Old 06-15-2011, 12:14 AM   #4
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Originally Posted by mama2madj
I never worried about who nursed first, the baby always nursed way more than the older anyways.
Yeah, that's true. I shouldn't worry... My MW actually mentioned something about how my toddler doesn't seem to nurse enough to worry about taking all the milk. I'll just make sure to give the nb first dibs and a decent shot at the hind milk.
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Old 06-15-2011, 12:25 AM   #5
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Be sure your partner is on the same page and willing to help with the bedtime routine.
Omg, I have put her to bed with nursing every night since birth. He had to maybe twice because I was gone but I have been trying to get him to help with naps at least. I am very frustrated because he kinda acts like once the evening is over his parenting duties are done. He has never really taken initiative to get her to sleep on her own unless I am not home which is like never. So, yeah, I need to have serious talk about how I will be very busy with the newbie so he needs to step it up!
I am tempted to use bottles with the nb, only a little, just so that he helps more with naps and night. It just didn't seem fair that I would have to put both kids to bed twice a day myself all the time.

Do you think it is a bad idea to use bottles so that he can be more involved? I would pump and mostly BF, not use formula...but I know nothing of bottles. My other two kids never wanted the bottle but I didn't exactly offer it enough to get then used to it.

???
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Old 06-15-2011, 08:53 AM   #6
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Re: Tandem

It's not something I would chose to do
If you do, do not start offering the bottle before breastfeeding is very well established, *at least* 6-8wks.
It would likely be more beneficial for everyone for your partner to focus on helping the toddler at bedtime, not the newborn. I would also suggest he start that sooner than later. Like NOW, so the toddlers transition to no longer being the baby hopefully goes more smoothly, not feeling you are pushing her away in favor of the new child.
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Old 06-15-2011, 09:10 AM   #7
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Re: Tandem

Yay for tandem

My toddler def helped w/ engorgement but she is only just 1 so she nurses now 4-5 times aday when b4 baby she was just nursing 1x and having bottles the rest (w/ formula) but now she is back to full time nursing. It works really well. She has her breast and the newb has his that way i never have to remember which side and who ate last... they just eat off the one side only. And my newb is def growing so it works for us. And sometimes i have to set a limit w/ my 1yo while her brother is nursing and tell her no, most the time i have her climb next to me and she nurses with him sweetest thing ever!!!!

Bed time routine...feed newb first then have DH take him to a different part of the house, then rock/nurse your toddler and do your normal routine. When your done go get newb and do his routine this is what we do, works great....
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Old 06-15-2011, 10:22 PM   #8
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Re: Tandem

yeah ixnay on the bottles! Good idea
Well, we shall see how things go!
My little girl these last few days seems to be not nursing as much...

se la vie!
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Old 06-16-2011, 08:23 AM   #9
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Re: Tandem

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Originally Posted by mama2madj View Post
It's not something I would chose to do
If you do, do not start offering the bottle before breastfeeding is very well established, *at least* 6-8wks.
It would likely be more beneficial for everyone for your partner to focus on helping the toddler at bedtime, not the newborn. I would also suggest he start that sooner than later. Like NOW, so the toddlers transition to no longer being the baby hopefully goes more smoothly, not feeling you are pushing her away in favor of the new child.
Totally agree here. If I didn't *have* to use bottles for work, I totally wouldn't choose to use them on purpose.

I was the only one who put my older to bed until about midway through my pregnancy, and then my husband took it over. My husband started helping put the little one to bed when she was about a year old, and then I went back to doing the older. The little one had stopped being able to nurse to sleep (she would nurse and still be awake) arount 11-12 months, so that's when bedtime became his duty. He still puts her to bed (and to nap if he's home) every day. He's much better than I am at it now!

As for tips on tandeming, the way I usually did it was, I'd let the little nurse on one side and then when she was ready to switch sides, I'd let the older nurse on the side she was done with and tandem them.
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Old 06-16-2011, 09:10 AM   #10
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i tandem nursed my two DS was 10.5 months when DD was born he still nursed every 4 hours and once during the night after DD was born and i had tons of milk DS refused the bottle ( he nursed my entire pregnancy with 1-2 bottles a day to supplement ) and would only nurse DD nursed every 2 hours so every other feeding i would nurse both of them when DD nursed by herself i would offer both sides when they both nursed they each got one side i tandem nursed them until DS self weaned at 18. months not long after i found out i was expecting again my DD is still nursing every 2-4 hours and sleeps a 4-6 hour stretch at night i am planing to tandem nurse her and the new baby. she will be 14 months and i plan to nurse her until two unless she self weans before that
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