Reply Hey Mom! Learn more about the Gerber Life Insurance Grow-Up Plan!
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 06-24-2011, 12:13 PM   #1
MeCo7707's Avatar
MeCo7707
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 2,976
My Mood:
How to deal with MY ec failures

Well if that's what you want to call them.

ODD is nearly three, has been diaperless and basically accident free since 9 months - her and I just had a fabulous EC groove.

YDD is 13 months and in dipes at night and while we go out and I am just beside myself

She started out SO well totally diperless during the day from 3-5 months with little to no accidents...then I got sick, and DH started working more, and she had an allergy to our water, and, and, and. OY! She aslo has a fused labia which causes her to sometimes miss her own need to pee. She does pretty good at taking herself to the potty to poop - she has been getting on the potty by herself since 10 or 11 months, and we are by no means accident free - but down to one or two pee misses a day most days. Also she hates when I offer the potty so basically I just leave it there and when she uses it she lets me know and I clean it. She hates the regular size toilets so getting her used to pottying while out and about just seems like an impossible task...

What am I getting at? Well I had it in my mind that this EC journey would be similar to my first only with LESS screwups and miss communications not MORE! How do you deal with your own failed expectations? And I am SO not upset with her - I realize that she is doing well, but in my eyes I'VE completly failed her.

Advertisement

__________________
Stop Stalking Me
MeCo7707 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-24-2011, 02:12 PM   #2
silvermaille's Avatar
silvermaille
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Very Suburban Chicago
Posts: 192
Re: How to deal with MY ec failures

You haven't failed her at all. If you weren't doing EC, she would be in diapers all the time. Your assumption was based on that it was about how YOU were doing with the EC process, not your child. It's about the process of communication and we all communicate differently. You should also realize that, when you were ECing your first, she was also your only. You can't always be attentive to the needs of one when you have two. Give yourself a break, mama.
__________________
Christi

Married to DH for 18 years, Mom to a little miracle queen bee (3/10)
silvermaille is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-24-2011, 05:49 PM   #3
wonton's Avatar
wonton
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: TX
Posts: 2,688
My Mood:
Re: How to deal with MY ec failures

I think the PP said it so well but I wanted to respond too.
I am in awe mama! Really you have not failed her in anyway!
Both of you have done so amazing!

I know I struggle w/"perfection" and I over analyze everything, I have this idea of how things should go and if it diverts from that I have a tendancy to focus on that instead of the bigger picture, and Im really hard on myself.

So I can relate!
__________________
~Amber, sahm to Caden 02/17/03, and Baby Georgia 1/30/11!
"I'll just have to save him. Because, after all, a person's a person no matter how small." His Body His Choice, Say NO to circumcision! ISO:xbox360 monster jam path of destruction
wonton is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-25-2011, 02:28 AM   #4
MeCo7707's Avatar
MeCo7707
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 2,976
My Mood:
Re: How to deal with MY ec failures

Thanks ladies!

Amber - I am SO much like you I am such a perfectionist and when a small failure happens I do focus on it...thanks for understanding!
__________________
Stop Stalking Me
MeCo7707 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-28-2011, 07:13 AM   #5
mel j
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 2,724
My Mood:
Re: How to deal with MY ec failures

Awww! You haven't failed her! Your children are just different. Your first daughter being out of diapers at 9 months has always amazed me! Mine were both older!

My children don't always like to use the potty when out; they'll try to hold it if they don't like a particular bathroom unless they really really badly have to go. My son often prefers using the potty in the back of the car with the back door closed all the way; occasionally he will use the potty in the public bathrooms. He tends to prefer the bathrooms that are one room bathrooms and usually will not go in the bathrooms that have more than one stall. I think he feels like the one room bathrooms are more private and "less scary". My daughter tends to prefer using the toilets, but only if she really badly has to go. Then there were the times they often seemed to like to stand to go, too which makes trying to potty them in public bathrooms hard...

I think I would keep taking her to the bathrooms, just to get her used to the idea that there are bathrooms in other places too, even if you don't think she has to go - just take her without even offering so she can get to know the bathrooms.

And yes, having two does make things a bit more difficult with EC'ing sometimes!

Last edited by mel j; 06-28-2011 at 07:15 AM.
mel j is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-07-2011, 10:03 PM   #6
jessicah
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 608
Re: How to deal with MY ec failures

I am doing EC for the 4th time.

And all four of mine have been different- some easier than others. Different personalities of each child, I think, is what really makes those differences in how they do. One of mine had food sensitivities and that also made it a little different. Changes in our lifestyle and/or living situation made some things different for each,too.

Our first, like yours, was pretty easy. We started at one month old and he was out of daytime diapers around 1 year and dry at night a month or so later.

Our second DS had LOTS of misses. After having such an easy first, he seemed difficult and I wondered if I was doing something wrong.
but even with all those misses, he ended up being potty trained by about 16 months for daytime.

Our little dd did excellent -rarely a miss at all during her first year of life. She was the easiest baby by a long shot...Then we moved and I put her in diapers during the pack/move time. After we moved and settled in she would not use the potty anymore- she ended up wetting or pooping in her pants for a whole YEAR- after being virtually accident free her first year of life. Crazy! I tried everything to get her to use the potty during that year. Nothing worked. Then all of a sudden the accidents completely stopped. Looking back, I can see that the year was pretty stressful for me and so it must have been for her too.

Our current little dd is 2 months old and so far so good. This time I am blessed to have 4 other little Mamas (4 older sisters) that are big enough to bring her to potty and change diapers. They can already tell when she is fussing because she has to go. Very neat.

Just wanted to share so you know your not alone - and every child is unique!
__________________
Jessica
jessicah is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-08-2011, 12:04 AM   #7
MeCo7707's Avatar
MeCo7707
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 2,976
My Mood:
Re: How to deal with MY ec failures

Jessica - thanks for sharing your experiences
__________________
Stop Stalking Me
MeCo7707 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-18-2011, 02:09 PM   #8
Sakari's Avatar
Sakari
Registered Users
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 4,138
Re: How to deal with MY ec failures

Meredith! I'm still waiting to read your EC book ;-) This new DD is just going to enhance that - no worries
__________________
DSS - 10yrs DSD - 6yrs DD - 4yrs
married to my best friend since 2007

I sell Baltic Amber jewelry!
Sakari is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-19-2011, 07:17 AM   #9
MeCo7707's Avatar
MeCo7707
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 2,976
My Mood:
Re: How to deal with MY ec failures

I kind of gave up on the EC book...my mom read it and said it was crap so I got discouraged and it is just sitting on the computer :/
__________________
Stop Stalking Me
MeCo7707 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-20-2011, 11:29 AM   #10
Sakari's Avatar
Sakari
Registered Users
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 4,138
Re: How to deal with MY ec failures

What does she know?!?! I bet it's great.

btw - Congrats on your pregnancy!
__________________
DSS - 10yrs DSD - 6yrs DD - 4yrs
married to my best friend since 2007

I sell Baltic Amber jewelry!
Sakari is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Copyright 2005 - 2014 Escalate Media. All Rights Reserved.