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Old 11-19-2011, 01:06 PM   #121
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Re: Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

I like my job but I hate working. Does this make sense? When I am there I give 110% but I would so much rather be at home tending to the house, the kids and family side of life (which I do anyhow). I miss my husband and my kids when I am working but if I didn't work, we would miss the paychecks and the flexibility and money that we use to do fun things, help out our family, etc. One day, I hope that my husband owns his own business and then I can work 1 or 2 days a week instead of 3-4. I think THAT would be perfect.

ETA: My work schedule is 3-1130pm so this works out great for our family. My youngest goes to the neighbor's house 1-2 days a week for 30 minutes and then he has back home with my oldest until my husband comes home. My oldest also picks up our middle son from school. He is SUPER helpful, but also gets paid a little because this is a little more than just contributing to the family. I rely on him to help. The only person it really sucks for is me because I get home after midnight- am up by 730am to get the smaller kids off to school, cook dinner, clean, etc THEN I go to work. So, it is like having 2 full time jobs without helping my kids with their homework 1-2 weeknights a week.

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Old 11-19-2011, 08:59 PM   #122
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Re: Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

I haven't read through this whole thread, but I definitely would not be a WOHM if I did not have to be. I think the grass is always greener on the other side, so both WOHM's and SAHM's have ideas about what the other half lives like. I don't think the answer is the same for everyone, and that's okay.

I spend a lot of time doing budgeting and trying to figure out what salary DH would need to make (he is a SAHD right now) in order for me to stay home at least part-time. I think a lot of it does have to do with upbringing in terms of whether you're happy with where you end up. I was raised by a SAHM and never dreamed that I wouldn't be one myself... so I have a lot of bitterness because I'm not where I thought I'd be with my family.
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Old 11-23-2011, 07:55 AM   #123
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Re: Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

I personally like it. I like my job and I feel like I am a better mom for it. I went to school for it and I feel I should be using my degree!
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Old 11-23-2011, 08:08 AM   #124
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Re: Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

I think I would go crazy if I were a SAHM...in fact I started to even while on my short maternity leaves...I am happy with my choice to be a WOHM and find my career fulfilling...working mom guilt creeps in for sure, but I dont feel like I'm less of a mother because I WOH and I dont think my kids will suffer at all because of that...in fact I think they benefit greatly from school/daycare and the socialization and learning that they get from it.
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Old 11-25-2011, 04:20 PM   #125
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tabbykat369
I haven't read through this whole thread, but I definitely would not be a WOHM if I did not have to be. I think the grass is always greener on the other side, so both WOHM's and SAHM's have ideas about what the other half lives like. I don't think the answer is the same for everyone, and that's okay.

I spend a lot of time doing budgeting and trying to figure out what salary DH would need to make (he is a SAHD right now) in order for me to stay home at least part-time. I think a lot of it does have to do with upbringing in terms of whether you're happy with where you end up. I was raised by a SAHM and never dreamed that I wouldn't be one myself... so I have a lot of bitterness because I'm not where I thought I'd be with my family.
sorry to hear that! I hope you can be a SAHM soon since that's what you want!
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Old 11-29-2011, 11:21 AM   #126
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Re: Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

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Originally Posted by GreenDahlia View Post
I personally think working makes me a better mom. I need to be doing something that makes me feel productive. Working also helps me appreciate and manage my time with her. I love looking forward to coming home to her everyday and our time on weekends. I also believe that she enjoys interacting with other people. But I think everyone is different and makes the best of their situation.
Agree to all this

For one year I worked 80% while hubby was sahd, and that was perfect
Now I have worked 100-110% for 6 months and I am exthausted. I am actually a SAHM from thursday, last day on job tomorrow. I will be back again in august, and I know that I will love it, but in the end of the periode I might miss my studies/work again.
I believe I will work reduced
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Old 11-30-2011, 09:45 PM   #127
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Re: Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

I love being a WOHM! I know it makes me a better mama and I'm very happy in my career. After DS was born 5 years ago, I went back to work (work/school, as I was a PhD student at the time) when he was only 5 weeks old. Some women were surprised that I was back "so soon" (as if I could make the semester begin at a different time or something!) and I was asked if I had "mommy guilt" quite a bit. I was actually offended, and a little disgusted, by those questions. I've never once experienced "mommy guilt" and I don't plan to, either! Our society has a way of making women feel like if they don't sacrifice all of their personal goals, needs, or desires for their family - especially their children - then there's something wrong with them. For me, my goals and needs are just as important as my family members' goals and needs and so I refuse to neglect my own needs and goals. For me, that means I work outside the home, which fulfills me in ways being a SAHM couldn't. I know my mom would like me to be a SAHM, and has said things over the years that "hint" at her disappointment in my decisions, but this is my life, not hers.

Now that DD is born, I'm going to go back to teaching on campus next semester as opposed to teaching online courses. DD will be with Daddy Mondays and Wednesdays, with me Tuesdays and Thursdays, and we'll find someone to watch her on Fridays. Thankfully, we both have full-time jobs that are flexible enough to allow us to work this kind of schedule out.
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Old 12-05-2011, 08:46 PM   #128
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Re: Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

I love being a WOHM! I love my career and have worked hard to get where I am.
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Old 12-23-2011, 12:28 PM   #129
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Re: Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

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Originally Posted by gaia06 View Post
I think I would go crazy if I were a SAHM...in fact I started to even while on my short maternity leaves...I am happy with my choice to be a WOHM and find my career fulfilling...working mom guilt creeps in for sure, but I dont feel like I'm less of a mother because I WOH and I dont think my kids will suffer at all because of that...in fact I think they benefit greatly from school/daycare and the socialization and learning that they get from it.
Yes to ALL of this!
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Old 12-23-2011, 12:45 PM   #130
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Re: Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

I like it, but I work slightly less than 1/4 time and have a lot of flexibility in my schedule. Working keeps my license current and I feel more comfortable having the ability to support my family even if I don't currently need to work much. I don't love my job, but I don't hate it. I do love some of my coworkers. For us, my income is the difference between struggling to make ends meet and being fairly comfortable. I hate being broke, so I am happy to work a bit to have extra savings and spending money. I would be really sad to have to work full time while my kids are little, but I feel like I have the best of both worlds right now. I will work more (mabye 1/2 or 2/3 time?) when the kids are all school-aged.
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