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Old 08-08-2011, 11:50 PM   #1
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9m old sleep help! im desperate!!

my son is 9 months old and sleeps terrible!!! Nap times i follow his cue when he starts to show signs of tired, i take to darkened bedroom, nurse and i have to hold him to sleep. even this is often awhile due to him crying and fighting. laying him in his crib terrifies me as im not into CIO. once asleep and ilay him down he sleeps for 20 mins or so and wakes crying, i get him back to sleep by sometimes holding or just giving soother back. After an hour or hour 15mins he wakes and his tired acting and cranky. Bedtime he wakes every 20 mins until finally around 11pm after a nother nurse he gets into a deeper sleep only to wake every 1-1.5hours. he is so so so restless!!! im not getting enough sleep and i cannot nap while he does as i have 2 other children and sometimes the only way to get him to settle is give him the boob. does he really need to eat this often? is he truely hungry? or is he using the boob as a soother(which he often wont take at these times!) any suggestions on what i can do or change? i wake up in the am and cry because im so tired but he is up. its making me have less patience with my others as im tired and thinking about what im doing wrong.

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Old 08-09-2011, 05:40 AM   #2
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Re: 9m old sleep help! im desperate!!

oh you poor thing! He sounds over tired. Do you have a nap schedule? You can start one by following his cues. At 9 months he could take three naps a day. It may be late for swaddeling but if he moving all around he may not be able to still his wiggles and that may help. Please know i went through what you are going through and it is hell. I am determined to do things different with this lo. I hated the idea of sleep training, which is not just CIO, walking away and letting them cry till they pass out. I did have to teach my dd to fall alseep without the boob. Then with out being held but I rubbed her back. Then I moved to just sitting close, then to not being in the room. Try not fall into the trap thinking "most" babies sleep through the night by now. Some luck mommiess have kids like that but NOT nearly as many as you think. At 9 months he could still be hungry at night but not the all night snack bar he seems to want There are tons of great books out there that you could pick and choose what works for YOU and your baby. I read No Cry Sleep Solution and while it was not a cure all there were good ideas in there that worked for us. Good luck mama. Get some help if you can just so you can get some sleep. It is amazing how much you can take if you are more rested.
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Old 08-09-2011, 07:25 AM   #3
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Re: 9m old sleep help! im desperate!!

Of course there is never 1 rule that fits every child but it sounds like to me he needs a set schedule. 9 months is getting close to the "cut off" point of getting one set up too. The older they get the harder it will be for you to get it sorted.

You said you are against CIO but have you read up on it? Or are you going by what people have told you about it? There are modified versions of CIO that is really more FIO which is "fuss it out." At 9 months old, your son is more than old enough to learn how to put himself to sleep without any psychological harm. He understands object permanence now, which means he knows when Mama leaves, you WILL come back when he wakes up.

My DD was much like him for the first 9 months of her life too. I had to nurse/hold her to get her to sleep. Anytime I tried to lay her down by herself she was sleep in random short bursts and wake up very, very often. This was even co-sleeping. As it turns out she is a VERY light sleeper so anytime I would move while I was trying to sleep, or DH, she would wake up and restart that entire cycle, we were all so very exhausted.

I was dead set against CIO until my Pedi sat down with us and explained a gentle method of doing it and he said we needed to do it for the sanity and health, that's right "HEALTH" of our entire family. When your little ones aren't getting enough rest, it can impact their physical and emotional health.

So we did it and our family couldn't be happier. My DD went from being a cranky pants to a happy, well rested child on a schedule in a week.

The method we used was:

Night 1: Do the bedtime routine, bathe, feed, put to bed. Turn on noise maker and leave the room. Let cry for 5 mins. Go back in and pat on the back. Leave again, let cry for 10 mins. Go back in, pat on the back, let cry 15 mins. Go back in pat on the back. Let cry 15 mins, go back in pat on the back, and she was OUT!.

Night 2: Do bedtime routine. Put into crib, let cry 5 mins, pat and let cry again 10 mins. She was OUT!

Each night she cried less and less and by the 4th night, she fussed for maybe 3 -5 mins and was OUT.

Not only did she put herself to sleep initially when I laid her down, she was out for the entire night. That's right, not 1.5-2 hour increments, she was out for a solid 8-10 hours.

So about 40 mins the first night, 25 mins the second night, 10 the 3rd etc and our sleeping routine was established. She's now 18 months old and sleeps like a champ. She goes down for naps at 11:45/12:00 and sleeps till 2 or 3. She goes to bed at night at 8:00 till 7am the next morning. Trust me, it was the best thing I ever did.
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Old 08-09-2011, 07:25 AM   #4
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Re: 9m old sleep help! im desperate!!

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