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Old 08-20-2011, 10:21 PM   #1
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It's Been A Rough Day

Like I said in my other thread, right now I'm having a 7-week miscarriage. As if it isn't hard enough dealing with that, my sister-in-law texted me this morning to announce that she's pregnant. I know that she doesn't know that we were pregnant or are having a loss, but still. I cannot even believe that I had to endure that announcement at the same time as I'm miscarrying or that I'll have to watch her be pregnant at the same time that I should have been. I just don't even know how I'm going to handle this.

Also, we took the kids out to eat because our power has been out due to a bad storm on Thursday. While we were out, I saw this hugely pregnant woman SMOKING A CIGARETTE. I just about lost it. I told DH, "Why does she get to be pregnant when that's what she's going to do? I've never even smoked a cigarette, but certainly wouldn't do it while I was pregnant, and I'm the one having a miscarriage?!" Life is just too cruel. I'm not a violent person, but I seriously wanted to punch that chick.

I just needed to vent. It feels like life is ganging up on me and sending me all kinds of things to just make this situation even more unbearable.


Lora, Wife to my best friend and homeschooling SAHM to:
A (3-07) , K (10-08) , C (7-12) my RAINBOW baby & K (8-14) our Subchorionic Hemorrhage/Chronic Placenta Abruption miracle, born at 36 weeks
Forever missing the baby that left too soon ~ August 18, 2011 ~ 7 weeks, 2 days
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Old 08-20-2011, 10:24 PM   #2
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Re: It's Been A Rough Day

A loss is so hard even without all that other stuff! I'm so sorry mama!
Jessica, wife to L (8-5-05) Breastfeeding, co-sleeping, non-vaxing, CDing, ECing, babywearing Mama to H (9-18-09), my miracle baby! TTC #2!
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Old 08-21-2011, 08:33 AM   #3
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Re: It's Been A Rough Day

i always want to punch people like that.. smoking and kids are an awful mix. i almost died because my mom smoked after i was born.. severe asthma ... dr said to quit or i die.. my mom is smart woman now.
My name is Amanda, happily married to Ernesto I'm a former HS teacher turned SAHM to Jake 6.7.10 and Norah 7.23.12

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Old 08-21-2011, 05:10 PM   #4
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Re: It's Been A Rough Day

I'm so sorry Mama. Sadly, I've been there. My youngest niece had the same due date as my last loss. It was hard to see my SIL pregnant...and very hard the first few times we saw our niece. I tried to be positive and excited for them, but came home and wept. It has gotten a lot easier over time. My thoughts are with you.
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Old 08-22-2011, 12:48 PM   #5
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Re: It's Been A Rough Day

Ugh. I'm so sorry mama.
I have several friends who are due within a week or two of my last MC- they are all having their babies now, and I'm waiting to MC again, it's heartbreaking. Since my last dd has come and gone I find that I can't even be in the same room as a hugely pregnant woman without crying. Sigh.
But I know in the end, it will be all worth it. When I have my sweet baby in my arms, this journey will all have a purpose. Everything is okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end.

Sending you lots of healing vibes.
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Old 08-23-2011, 11:38 AM   #6
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Re: It's Been A Rough Day

It's so, so hard. I knew two women in my social circle due within a week of when DD should've come... it's still so hard to see them with their little ones, like an echo of what I should've had. Had two more due within a month of one of my early losses (one of them announced about a week after I m/c) and had to watch them go through the whole process, too...

And yet three of my cousins on my mother's side had kids when they were in their teens, weren't trying, weren't really in a position to take care of them. One of them had five abortions after her first child, then decided to keep the next one along (he was born four months after DD left). I still don't understand how the universe decides who gets the blessings and who doesn't - especially when so many people don't appreciate what they've got.

There's no easy way to get through any of this, but I wish you peace and strength.

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Old 08-23-2011, 08:21 PM   #7
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Re: It's Been A Rough Day

oh Mama My sister and I were pregnant at the same time... I waited to tell her till we had a heartbeat on US (around 9 weeks) but we MC'd at 11 weeks. Her pregnancy has progressed just fine... I struggled a LOT..

Cling to those who love and support you... do what you can... focus on yourself without feeling guilty for not being happy for your SIL... It's so hard give yourself time
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Old 09-07-2011, 11:24 PM   #8
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Re: It's Been A Rough Day

I am dealing with a 7 week loss as well. I found out I was pregnant a week after my brothers girlfriend found out she was pregnant. [The couldnt afford birth control and it definitely wasn't planned. My husband and I had been trying for 9+ months] We announced our pregnancy and she told my brother behind my back that she was PISSED that I was pregnant and that she wanted the attention all to herself and she thought we had stopped trying. Now I have lost my baby I so desperately wanted [and all she can say is she doesnt want to be pregnant.] and she got her way. She is the only one pregnant. She will have all the attention she wants. Oh, and she is being a complete priss. My brother jsut barely got a job and they are not rich, but she doesnt want ANYTHING used for HER baby, it isnt good enough blah blah blah...

I don't understand why this happened to you or I instead of other people who couldnt care less. I am sorry to let my vent out on your thread, but I wanted you to know I understand.
♥ Wife to Eric [9/26/2009] ♥ Mama to Collin [1/18/2010] ♥ Mama to seven angels [9/6/2011][12/27/2011][4/10/2012][7/22/2012][10/8/2012][3/18/2013][9/3/2013] <3 Praying for a Rainbow <3
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Old 09-08-2011, 06:31 PM   #9
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So much good advice and some wonderful support here already, but I wanted to add some and to let you know I'm praying for ya.

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(Hayden, Felicity and Teagan), and ten in heaven.
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