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Old 09-12-2011, 09:53 PM   #21
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Not sure if we count as non-traditional, but I'm young! I just turned 21. DH (almost 28) and I have a 19 month old. We got engaged when I was 18 and I got pregnant a few months later. We got married almost a year ago. I can't say that we're totally into the non-gender programming, as I love bows on DD, but she has cars, trucks, superheros, a tool kit, and other "boy" toys. She also has super hero shirts and tons of GN clothes. We let her play with whatever she wants and wear whatever she wants. We also live in western KY, so everyone here considers us non-traditional ( CDing, BFing, vegetarians, recycling,etc). I love hearing about you guys!!!

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Old 09-13-2011, 05:58 AM   #22
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Hi! I'm Carisa, single mama to my awesome 13 month old daughter Clara. I currently work full time as a writer and go to school part time - I'm about 6 months from a bachelors in child psych!
I don't really discuss the full story often because people judge, but my daughter's father and I were never in a relationship. We were "friends" if you catch my drift...He stopped taking my phone calls when I was 14 weeks pregnant and was MIA until my daughter was 10 months old. It's been so hard letting him into our lives, but I do believe he has the potential to be a good father and I don't want to deprive my daughter of that.
He's done everything he can to try and make it right, but I still harbor a lot of anger toward him. It's hard.
So, that's us in a nutshell!
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Old 09-13-2011, 08:20 PM   #23
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Hi! I'm Carisa, single mama to my awesome 13 month old daughter Clara. I currently work full time as a writer and go to school part time - I'm about 6 months from a bachelors in child psych!
I don't really discuss the full story often because people judge, but my daughter's father and I were never in a relationship. We were "friends" if you catch my drift...He stopped taking my phone calls when I was 14 weeks pregnant and was MIA until my daughter was 10 months old. It's been so hard letting him into our lives, but I do believe he has the potential to be a good father and I don't want to deprive my daughter of that.
He's done everything he can to try and make it right, but I still harbor a lot of anger toward him. It's hard.
So, that's us in a nutshell!
Hi there


Yaya for you for trying to do what you think is best, whatever that is. My DH was a truck driver and when he was around he was disinterested in DS1 until he was 1.5. It was so hard to see DS try and try and try to get DH's attention/interest.
NOw, he tries really hard to get DS1 to play/cuddle/interact and the table has turned. DH has been so much better with DS2 and DS2 has responded in kind... DH has realized what the consequences of his attitude back then have had. They are repairing their relationship tho and making progress.

Give them both room and time, and support it as much as you can. At the same time, you have every right to feel angry, and to express that constructively. I can't wait to hear about the progress as time goes on. WElcome!
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Old 09-13-2011, 08:22 PM   #24
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Re: Off to a good start.

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Not sure if we count as non-traditional, but I'm young! I just turned 21. DH (almost 28) and I have a 19 month old. We got engaged when I was 18 and I got pregnant a few months later. We got married almost a year ago. I can't say that we're totally into the non-gender programming, as I love bows on DD, but she has cars, trucks, superheros, a tool kit, and other "boy" toys. She also has super hero shirts and tons of GN clothes. We let her play with whatever she wants and wear whatever she wants. We also live in western KY, so everyone here considers us non-traditional ( CDing, BFing, vegetarians, recycling,etc). I love hearing about you guys!!!

thats sounds pretty non-trad to me. I am a stay at home mama, and that is really unusual around here. Also, *not* beating my children on a regular basis is considered bad parenting... Sigh... where you live really changes your perspective on yourself right?
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Old 09-13-2011, 08:28 PM   #25
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Yay for a Poly mama! I'm not one myself (I honestly know I could never do it), but I'm totally supportive of those that do/can. I loved watching the Sister Wives show on TLC. I had never really known much about polygamy before then. It really opened my eyes. I hate when people assume how "that world" does stuff. My Mom brings up the old ways (you can't leave a poly family, they are strict, women are slaves.. blah blah.. I swear she gets this stuff from weird's!!). I really liked the show.

I'm all for a non-judgemental place to chat.
Hi there, great to have you!

Just a quick note (That I am sure will have to be repeated, really needs to be a sticky on this forum):
I will state very Clearly that there are different terms:

Poly: Short For Polyamorous
Polyg: Short for polygamous
Open: means a relationship that is not strictly speaking monogamous. (often denotes allowance of physical relationships outside the marriage)
Compersion: The experience of feeling Joy because someone you love is experiencing Joy.

I am Poly, not a polyg. geez it complicated! lol...
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Old 09-13-2011, 08:34 PM   #26
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I read in My Mother Wears Combat Boots about gender programming and even though the author tried to be extremely careful about it her daughter was still a fashionista. I think some children just have personality traits. They are "something inside that cannot be denied!" (Guess the song, win a prize... ha ha)
suggestion to read: Feminist Parenting by Dena Taylor
great book about non-sexist parenting


i don't consider myself "non traditional". we're just who we are
me 30
Wife 31
married (legally, thank you Ontario, Canada) 5 yrs.
DS (who wears a heck of a lotta pink) will be 3yrs old in December. (im bio mom to him) my DW will ttc baby #2 whenever we're ready.
hi
and hi Carrie(as you know i join threads then never post again)
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Old 09-16-2011, 08:54 AM   #27
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Re: Off to a good start.

I'm Lisa, single mama to two boys 5 and 2 now. I separated from my ex well over a year ago and our divorce was final in may (though the 'proceedings' began around this time last year lol). It took me a while to pay for everything so that was the hang up lol

I've met several quacks along the way but recently began dating someone and he's been a wonderful man so far. We're 150 miles apart - so it's kind of good in a way so that he have lots and lots of time to talk without putting other things first and feel like we haven't gotten to know each other. KWIM? He's a little older than me (13 years) but it works perfectly for us (i've been interested in older man for a few reasons). He has 5 kids of his own but they are much older than my children..many positives so far and no red flags so we'll wait and see. For now just enjoying the moment!
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Old 09-17-2011, 11:47 AM   #28
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Mysonsclothbum, I had no idea. Welcome.

Weezy, Good luck! our boys are close in age, it would be cool to have the bigger ones write letters, would you be interested?
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Old 09-17-2011, 12:14 PM   #29
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I suppose we fit in the non-traditional a little. Our house consists of me, dh, my son from a prev. marriage (13), dd (10), ds (3), sister (19), and her son (19m). My dh doesnt sleep with me in the bedroom, my ds and I co sleep. It works for us. I stay home and thats not the norm here either. I dont beat my kids, thats not the norm either. I cd and thats frowned upon too. I cook and bake for my family on a daily basis and take care of their every need. Friends call me Donna Reed. LOL. But like I said...it works for us.
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Old 09-17-2011, 12:58 PM   #30
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I suppose we fit in the non-traditional a little. Our house consists of me, dh, my son from a prev. marriage (13), dd (10), ds (3), sister (19), and her son (19m). My dh doesnt sleep with me in the bedroom, my ds and I co sleep. It works for us. I stay home and thats not the norm here either. I dont beat my kids, thats not the norm either. I cd and thats frowned upon too. I cook and bake for my family on a daily basis and take care of their every need. Friends call me Donna Reed. LOL. But like I said...it works for us.
sounds pretty normal to me too

My goal is to show everyone how "non-traditional" is really... well... just about everyone.
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