Diaper Swappers

lilsoldiersmommy · 09-08-2011, 10:05 PM

So my husband told me over a msg that he wanted a divorce about 2 1/2 months ago. He then emptied out our bank acct and was only sending me $1000 a month. All of our stuff was in storage in tx since I moved home to have the twins. After consulting with a lawyer, I decided to go get my things and also most household stuff we acquired while married. We gave had very little contact since then. He always tries to say I was keeping his kids from him etc, but when I wound tell him when to be on skype, he never was. He never told me when he was coming home, I had to find out on another girls page! He has cheated throughout our marriage.

Fast forward to today, he gets back and immediately goes to our storage unit and sees everything is gone and calls me asking why I took HIS stuff. I told him it was ours and I could.

I want to file for separation/ divorce but unfortunately my lawyer requires $2700 upfront and I don't want to use up most of my savings. The reason I would like to file is so I can get temporary child support bc I know he is gonna try to not give me anything, especially now(he has already stopped the allotment he had set up.)

For people who have gone through thus what are your suggestions on what I could do or is there anything you found out later that you wish you knew at tue beginning?

Sorry for such a long post.

pcjs · 09-08-2011, 10:28 PM

I would talk to JAG and see if they can refer you to someone cheaper and file at the local child support office and let them take care of it - its free to file.

3rockstars · 09-09-2011, 06:35 AM

Did you go through JAG to speak to a lawyer already? Is that the one that wants $2700? If not, JAG is always an option. A good friend of mine had her divorce done through JAG and is quite pleased with it. Her husband was also cheating on her and not giving her child support when he left her.
Also, did you find out if you qualify for legal aid? They take FOREVER but they are great if you have no other option. Legal aid did my divorce. Ours was simple and uncontested so I can't attest to their skill with contested divorces but I was pleased once they finally contacted me back to get the process rolling. It goes by need essentially so the most pressing the issues, the faster you get help. I found the phone number for mine off my state's human services webpage.

Good luck with this. He sounds like a butthead.

lilsoldiersmommy · 09-09-2011, 08:19 AM

I have not gone to JAG, I am back home in Ga and the nearest base is an hour an a half away. The lawyer I went to is a good one. The upfront cost is for the filing fee and 10 hours of work. I know it will be contested unfortunately I have a feeling it will be a long drawn out process. My dad's friend (who is also a family lawyer and I might go to him) said to way and let him file so he would have to pay the filing fee.

Can I file for child support with no other kind if orders like a separation or divorce?

Sha-nanagins · 09-09-2011, 10:58 AM

You need to contact JAG. You don't mention what your husband's rank is, but if he is lower ranked enlisted, some of the pay allowances he receives are specifically due to him being married. Also, though I understand that it does depend on the specific officers involved and that times have likely changed, the military in general does not look kindly on public adultery or failing to financially support one's children (yes, I know it's common, but they don't want it broadcast). If your husband's chain of command is one of those, they will, shall we say, encourage him to reinstate the support allotment.

3rockstars · 09-09-2011, 04:18 PM

yes you can file for child support separately. I know my divorce was $151.50 to file but I went through Child support Enforcement for child support before the divorce because I was waiting on legal aid so I don't know the cost. Maybe it's similar to the divorce, that's why I posted the figure.

justjacqueline · 09-10-2011, 05:32 AM

Are your children on Medicaid? If so, they will take him to court and MAKE him pay. Even if they have to take it from his pay automatically every month. I would also check out LegalAid, we have used them for custody issues and they have worked just as hard as top dollar lawyers!

and good luck mama!

09-08-2011, 10:05 PM	#1
lilsoldiersmommy Registered Users Join Date: May 2009 Location: Georgia Posts: 380 Ratings: 2 Feedback: 100%	It begins..... So my husband told me over a msg that he wanted a divorce about 2 1/2 months ago. He then emptied out our bank acct and was only sending me $1000 a month. All of our stuff was in storage in tx since I moved home to have the twins. After consulting with a lawyer, I decided to go get my things and also most household stuff we acquired while married. We gave had very little contact since then. He always tries to say I was keeping his kids from him etc, but when I wound tell him when to be on skype, he never was. He never told me when he was coming home, I had to find out on another girls page! He has cheated throughout our marriage. Fast forward to today, he gets back and immediately goes to our storage unit and sees everything is gone and calls me asking why I took HIS stuff. I told him it was ours and I could. I want to file for separation/ divorce but unfortunately my lawyer requires $2700 upfront and I don't want to use up most of my savings. The reason I would like to file is so I can get temporary child support bc I know he is gonna try to not give me anything, especially now(he has already stopped the allotment he had set up.) For people who have gone through thus what are your suggestions on what I could do or is there anything you found out later that you wish you knew at tue beginning? Sorry for such a long post. __________________ Emily-SAHM to DS J 4/08 and twins L & K 2/11

09-08-2011, 10:28 PM	#2
pcjs Registered Users Join Date: Jan 2010 Posts: 14,206	Re: It begins..... I would talk to JAG and see if they can refer you to someone cheaper and file at the local child support office and let them take care of it - its free to file. __________________ Mom to my wonderfully sweet toddler who is the joy of our lives. :

09-09-2011, 06:35 AM	#3
3rockstars Registered Users Formerly: FaeryGnomeHome Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: becoming more comfortable in my own skin Posts: 15,135 Ratings: 349 Feedback: 100%	Re: It begins..... Did you go through JAG to speak to a lawyer already? Is that the one that wants $2700? If not, JAG is always an option. A good friend of mine had her divorce done through JAG and is quite pleased with it. Her husband was also cheating on her and not giving her child support when he left her. Also, did you find out if you qualify for legal aid? They take FOREVER but they are great if you have no other option. Legal aid did my divorce. Ours was simple and uncontested so I can't attest to their skill with contested divorces but I was pleased once they finally contacted me back to get the process rolling. It goes by need essentially so the most pressing the issues, the faster you get help. I found the phone number for mine off my state's human services webpage. Good luck with this. He sounds like a butthead.

09-09-2011, 08:19 AM	#4
lilsoldiersmommy Registered Users Join Date: May 2009 Location: Georgia Posts: 380 Ratings: 2 Feedback: 100%	I have not gone to JAG, I am back home in Ga and the nearest base is an hour an a half away. The lawyer I went to is a good one. The upfront cost is for the filing fee and 10 hours of work. I know it will be contested unfortunately I have a feeling it will be a long drawn out process. My dad's friend (who is also a family lawyer and I might go to him) said to way and let him file so he would have to pay the filing fee. Can I file for child support with no other kind if orders like a separation or divorce? __________________ Emily-SAHM to DS J 4/08 and twins L & K 2/11 Last edited by lilsoldiersmommy; 09-09-2011 at 08:23 AM.

09-09-2011, 10:58 AM	#5
Sha-nanagins Registered Users Join Date: Jun 2009 Posts: 1,606 Ratings: 6 Feedback: 100% My Mood:	Re: It begins..... You need to contact JAG. You don't mention what your husband's rank is, but if he is lower ranked enlisted, some of the pay allowances he receives are specifically due to him being married. Also, though I understand that it does depend on the specific officers involved and that times have likely changed, the military in general does not look kindly on public adultery or failing to financially support one's children (yes, I know it's common, but they don't want it broadcast). If your husband's chain of command is one of those, they will, shall we say, encourage him to reinstate the support allotment.